Female of the Species Part 7

[lesley@xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx]

Hi Everyone,

Here is Part Seven of Female of the Species :-)



PART SEVEN

"This is great. Just like old times," Xander said, not sounding as
though all of them being together was "great" at all. "Gang's all
here. Question is - why are we all here? Thought we were done with
all that supernatural shit."
Buffy watched Xander as he stared moodily into his drink - a
large scotch on the rocks. Not too many rocks though, Buffy had heard
Xander tell Giles; he didn't want the precious amber fluid to be
watered down and have its effect spoiled. He took a gulp, seemed
almost desperate to get the liquor inside of him. Looking at
Cordelia, Buffy saw an expression of concern shoot over her features.
Then the concern turned to irritation, as though Xander was partaking
of way too many scotches lately for her liking. Princess Cordelia had
no time for drunkenness, and usually she expressed this dislike
vociferously. Buffy wondered how long it would be before Cordelia's
famous sarcasm surfaced. She hoped it wouldn't surface here, because
an argument between Xander and Cordelia was not what any of them
needed.
Although only a week or so had passed since Buffy and Willow had
last met up with Xander and Cordelia, Buffy could see that something
had happened to Xander. And it wasn't something good.
He'd lost weight for a start. An apparently startling amount in
so short a time. His clothes hung off his tall frame, giving him a
somewhat half-starved appearance. Buffy knew that Cordelia wasn't
exactly into cooking - more often than not, Xander had to fend for
himself - but he'd always seemed to thrive. Now he seemed to be
fading away.
Looks sick& Buffy thought, saw Willow nod as her thoughts were
heard and assimilated.
Yeah. You think it has something to do with what Giles wants to
discuss with us?
Willow's mental voice was slightly subdued, and Buffy thought
again how Willow was still worried about her encounter with the
Goddess; was still concerned that she had upset her divine guardian
in some way.
She was about to answer, when Giles began to speak.
"I'm glad you could all make it," he began, apparently ill at
ease, somehow shifty. Unlike Giles, Buffy noted. Usually Giles, even
if he didn't know what they were dealing with, was open and
forthright. But then, they hadn't had to deal with anything too
threatening for a long time. Apart from the usual vampire slaying,
which Buffy mostly coped with alone, nothing big had occurred since
the closing of the Hellmouth. Perhaps he was just out of practise.
Well, they all were&
"I've been looking into your dream, Buffy," Giles was saying,
glancing at Joyce, who gave him an encouraging smile, "and although
what you told me doesn't exactly fit with what I've learned, I think
the creatures in the dream were demons."
"Yeah, well, I said they were, didn't I?" Buffy felt a kind of
relief settle over her; she knew she hadn't been mistaken. And if
they were demons, then she could do something about them. Like kill
them.
"Thing is, Buffy, that they mean you no harm." Giles took off
his glasses, began cleaning them furiously, definitely uneasy now. A
faint flush stained his unusually pale cheeks.
"Well, they're demons, aren't they? Of course they mean me
harm&" Buffy wondered why he was acting so cagey, almost guilty, as
though he had done something to be ashamed of. Giles' flush deepened,
and pressed the cleaning cloth so hard against his glasses, that
Buffy thought the pressure might break them. She saw her mother lay a
hand atop of Giles', and Giles sighed, stopped the action. Answered
Buffy's last query.
"My research has led me to believe that these demons - who are
definitely female, by the way - only attack men."
"Way cool demons," Cordelia said acidly, glaring at Xander, who
was still staring fixedly into the bottom of his glass, apparently
uncaring of what was being said. He appeared to be in a kind of
waking dream-state.
"Cordelia, as ever, your remarks aren't helpful," Giles snapped,
and Buffy saw a small, nastily pleased smile curve Xander's mouth.
Knew that something was indeed badly wrong with her friends'
relationship.
"Well, excuse me, I'm sure. Maybe I'm not needed here," Cordelia
said.
"No maybe about it," Xander muttered, causing a little thrill of
horror to pass through Buffy.
They're gonna have a fight, she told Willow, who nodded,
apparently resigned to the belief that everything that was going
wrong was her fault. Hey, Will, snap out of it&
"I beg your pardon?" Cordelia said in response to Xander's jibe,
sounding shocked to the core. Xander looked over at her, eyes sunken
into dark pits in his unshaven face.
"You heard," he said.
"Hey, c'mon, this is hardly the time or the place&" Buffy began,
trying to defuse the situation, but neither Xander nor Cordelia
appeared to have heard her. Or didn't want to.
"Why would I wanna be with a stuck-up, snobby bitch who&?"
Xander began, but got no further, because Cordelia stood abruptly,
leaned across and slapped his face hard.
"Oh, for God's sake," Giles muttered in disgust. "Stop this, you
two..."
"Hey," Cordelia said, sounding beyond fury. "I'm stopping it
right now. I know when I'm not wanted."
"Damn straight you're not," Xander replied.
"Xander!" But Giles' remonstration went unheeded, and Cordelia,
with a final furious glance at Xander, fled the room. A few seconds
later, the front door banged, indicating that Cordelia had left for
good.
"Shouldn't you go after her?" Joyce, who had been sitting
quietly throughout all this, suggested. Xander sneered.
"Let her go. I'm sick of her."
"Xander, what's wrong?" Buffy asked, although she knew the whole
subject of his and Cordelia's relationship was completely off topic.
But how could she ignore her friend's pain? Especially when it had
been thrust in her face so forcefully. Xander pushed his glass in
Giles' direction, and Giles took it without a word, poured some more
scotch, although Buffy thought that Xander had had enough already.
"She pisses me off," Xander said, sounding like a sulky child.
"You don't say?" Giles remarked, handing Xander the glass. "But
this is hardly the time or place, Xander."
Xander shrugged, as though he didn't care. Then he sighed, put
his head in his hands. Gently, Buffy took the glass from him, fearing
he might drop it, and then laid an arm across his shoulders. He smelt
somehow sour, not unwashed, but certainly unclean, as though all his
negative emotions had formed a kind of haze around his body.
"Things that bad?" she asked. Heard Xander sigh deeply, and
although she couldn't see his face, she knew he was near tears.
Casting a troubled look at the others, she repeated the question.
"Been bad for a long time," Xander admitted.
Buffy nodded; it was common knowledge that Xander and Cordelia
fought a lot, but no one had really thought they were hurting because
of it. Fighting was just the way Xander and Cordelia were together,
the way they'd always been. But Buffy sensed there was something else
wrong here. Something bigger than just a crumbling relationship that
had never really been right. But Xander, after a slight hesitation,
just shook his head.
"Things've just got on top of me lately, that's all." He sat up
straighter, took the glass from Buffy's hand, drank from it. "Hey,
sorry, you guys. Shouldn't burden you with my problems, right?"
"You're our friend," Xander," Willow said softly. "Of course you
should."
"You gonna break up with Cordy?" Buffy said, thinking that this
would probably be best all round. Xander smiled that somehow nasty
smile again.
"Yeah. Yeah, I reckon I just might. In fact, I reckon I just
have." He tipped the rest of the scotch down his throat. "So, Giles,
what's it all about?"
Giles cleared his throat, obviously wondering if he should try
to explain, or whether not to bother, so Buffy smiled encouragingly
at him.
"Yeah, c'mon, Giles. We all obviously need to kick some demon
ass. Get rid of the tensions. So who are they?"
"Have you heard of Lilith?" Giles said, and Buffy heard Willow
give a little gasp, at the same time remembered that name from
Willow's invocation.
"Yeah, she's an aspect of the Mother Goddess," Buffy supplied,
because Willow had gone pale, and was looking down at her shaking
hands. She thought for the first time that maybe Willow was right to
feel afraid about what she'd done the other night. But Willow had
only been trying to help when she'd invoked the Goddess. The thought
that maybe she'd made things - whatever they were - worse, was an
unpleasant, somehow disloyal thought. But Buffy said nothing; it
wasn't her place to implicate Willow.
"Dark aspect of the Goddess," Willow muttered. Giles frowned.
"Yes, well, I don't know much about that," he said. "Wicca is
your speciality, Willow, not mine. But I do know that Lilith was
regarded as evil by the ancient Hebrews, and went down in legend as a
male-hating demon." He peered at Willow thoughtfully. "Of course,
Wicca was originally a primarily female thing&"
"What are you trying to imply, Giles? That I'm a demon
worshipper?" Willow sounded upset."
"No, don't be silly, Willow. I'm just saying that because Wicca
is a female orientated religion, it would be natural for its
followers to embrace female icons. Diana, Selene, for example, and
also Hecate and, I suppose, Lilith. Dark and light, as is all life."
"So what are you saying?" Willow asked.
"I'm not quite sure what I'm saying, except that I believe that
Buffy's dream is to do with Lilith, and my research has led me to
believe that she and her demon children, the Lilim, are in fact
beginning to attack males in this city at this time, for whatever
reason."
"And what evidence do you have to back this up?" Buffy asked,
upset that Willow was upset, because how dare Giles imply that Willow
was somehow responsible for whatever was happening? Anyway, how could
Willow be responsible? Buffy had dreamed her dream before Willow had
invoked the Goddess&
She noticed that Giles was flushed again, embarrassed. He
cleared his throat, glanced at Joyce, apparently for support, and
Buffy saw her mother nod.
"I&er& was researching female demons in the library," he began,
and went on to tell them what had happened.
Buffy, listening to how Giles had apparently had an encounter
with a seductive demon, was alternatively shocked that her adopted
father had been almost attacked in a dream by an evil being, and
blackly amused that even the straight-laced Giles should be open to
such fantasies. But then, Giles was a married man now, and unless he
and her mother had a platonic relationship, then Giles would be a
regular participant in the pleasures of the flesh. Again, Buffy
decided she wasn't going to dwell on that aspect of his life.
"Okay," Buffy said slowly, trying to dispel the disturbing
images from her mind. "So you had a & dream& And you've found out
that Lilith doesn't like men. That she supposedly kills them in their
dreams like a female Freddie Kruger. What other evidence do you have?"
"Well, I don't have any hard evidence&" Giles began, causing
Xander to snigger.
"Seemed like you&"
"Shut up, Xander," Giles said, sounding disgusted. "But when I
got home from researching, the headlines in the newspaper made me
think that maybe there was something going on. True, my dream could
have been triggered by what I'd read, but the unexplained deaths of
five male infants overnight in the maternity unit is highly
suspicious to me. I think we should certainly investigate further
into Lilith and her followers."
Buffy nodded. Suddenly Pete Madison's death had taken on a whole
new meaning. And hadn't the Goddess said that her investigation would
help lead them to the truth?
"I've asked Ethan Rayne for help&"
"That scumbag," Xander interrupted. "Why'd you ask him? You hate
the guy."
" I asked him because he's about the only person I know who has
access to unlimited information. And because he owes me, and because
I have a lot of incriminating evidence against him that could get him
locked up for a long time." Giles smiled tightly. "He might well be a
scumbag, Xander, but he's a useful scumbag. Anyway, he should be able
to provide us with more information very soon. In the meantime, we
must carry on, and be extra vigilant."
"Well, I'm investigating a dating agency tomorrow," Buffy said,
and went on to tell them her discoveries. She knew she really
shouldn't be disclosing what she'd learned - it was FBI classified
knowledge - but if there was something demonic happening, then
everyone had to know. "Could be just the thing female demons might
set up if they wanted to attract lonely men. Seems kinda out there,
but you never know, right?"
"I feel bad," Willow said. And it all came tumbling out of her
mouth - how she'd invoked all aspects of the Goddess. How she
realised that she'd been offered the chance to think about what she
was doing, but hadn't. "It's like I gave Lilith permission to step up
her work, whatever that is. Like I made it all worse."
"You can't know that, Will," Buffy said, but she thought it was
true, really.
"If Lilith had decided to come to earth, to this city, then
these things would have happened anyway," Giles pointed out.
"Yeah, maybe, but it would've been slower. I don't think we have
a lot of time, Giles. I think my invoking Lilith as part of the
Goddess has speeded things up. Given her more power."
Silence as they all digested this disturbing theory. No one
seemed inclined to argue.
"Has anything& odd& happened to you, Xander?" Buffy asked. She
thought Xander hesitated before he answered, then he shook his head
emphatically.
"No. Nothing."
"You sure. No weird dreams? No&?"
"Told you," Xander snapped. "Nothing. Why would any
self-respecting demon pick on me for their sexual pleasure? Or want
to give me any, for that matter? No-one else does." Another all-too
apparent dig at Cordelia.
"Xander, I don't think this is about sex. I think it's about
domination. And killing males." Giles broke in, and he sounded
worried. Buffy didn't blame him. Giles had, after all, had an
encounter with one of these seductive, deadly creatures that very
afternoon. Who knew what would have happened if Giles hadn't come to
his senses in time?
"Only one female demon in my life," Xander muttered, "and she's
just left."
"You will let us know if anything like that happens, won't you?"
Buffy said.
"Yeah, yeah," Xander said, and Buffy felt almost certain that he
wasn't being entirely truthful. But why would he lie if his life was
possibly in danger? Xander valued his life too much to want to risk
it.
"Well, that's about it," Giles said. "I've told you all I know.
But you should all be aware of what might be happening."
"We'll be vigilant, Giles," Buffy promised.
"Yeah," Willow added. "And I'll go home and try to contact the
Goddess again. See if she'll answer our questions. Maybe she'll take
it back. The dark aspect I mean. If that's what's happened."
Willow stood, sounding happier now she thought she might be
able to help rather than be the partial cause of the problem. Buffy
held out her hands, and Willow took them, squeezed them.
"Let's go then," Buffy said. "Who knows, with a bit of luck, we
might be able to end this tonight."

Of course, that was too much to hope for. Really, Buffy thought, as
Willow unsuccessfully tried to raise the Goddess a number of times,
they should have known better. Once evil had been invoked - even in
all innocence, as had happened here - it wasn't easily dismissed.
Apparently the Goddess had abandoned them, at least for now.
Buffy stroked Willow's hair, laid an arm over her lover's
shoulders, and drew her close. Felt her crying against her; felt hot
tears soak into her T-shirt.
"It'll be okay," she soothed, praying that she was right. "I
promise you, it'll be okay."
"How can you promise that?" Willow whispered against Buffy's
breast. "The Goddess has deserted us, and it's all my fault."
Buffy didn't quite know what to say to Willow's guilty words.
Part of her wanted to say that none of this was Willow's fault. The
other part - which prevented her from saying it - knew that Willow
was at least partially right. Maybe, if Willow had only invoked the
light side of the Goddess, the problem could have been solved before
demons started attacking Giles. And before five newborn males had
died, leaving devastated parents behind to mourn them.
But Buffy didn't say any of that. What point in upsetting
Willow, who was already so upset with herself?
"C'mon, Will," she said, raising Willow's face to hers. "We've
been through worse than this, right?"
Willow shrugged, looked for all the world like a deserted child
or a whipped puppy.
Adorable, Buffy thought, sending the thought out to Willow's
mind. You're so adorable& Saw a tiny, reluctant smile lift Willow's
mouth, causing both love and desire to flare in Buffy's heart.
"Look at what happened when I let Angel make love to me," Buffy
murmured, brushing Willow's mouth with hers. "He turned bad." Another
brush of the lips, more lingering. "At least you'll never turn bad on
me, Will. You're too pure. Still untouched, despite everything."
Willow returned Buffy's kiss, deepened it.
"I'm starting not to feel very pure," she said, winding her arms
around Buffy's neck, pulling her closer, closer still.
Buffy grinned in delight against Willow's open mouth. At last
she had helped Willow to emerge from her self-flagellating depression.
"Show me how impure you're feeling, Will," Buffy murmured,
stroking Willow's hair, running her hands over her body, feeling the
flames of arousal flare higher until they burned out of control. Not
needing to make Willow feel better now.
Just needing&
"Show me, Will," she repeated.
And Willow did.