Fic: The Wolf Within (9/?)

[Erin <erin@xxxxxxxxxxx>]

TITLE: The Wolf Within
AUTHOR: Erin (erin@xxxxxxxxxxx)
SPOILERS: None, really.
RATING: PG-13 at worst, because of some violence. It is a
Buffy/Willow fic, so if that bothers you, or it's illegal to even
think of a Slayer and a Witch getting it on, then just don't read it.
Or move.
DISCLAIMER: Buffy the Vampire Slayer and all characters belong to Joss
Whedon, Mutant Enemy, and Fox. I'm just borrowing them for a bit.
I'll put them back when I'm done, no worse for wear (but maybe a
little happier). Most of the werewolf stuff is copyright White Wolf,
such as Garou, Crinos, Child of Gaia, Glass Walker, etc.
ARCHIVE: Currently, I believe my stories are being archived at the
following places:
Kim's Corner - 
http://www.fortunecity.com/village/villageplace/93/
Bill's Page -
http://members.spree.com/entertainment/kerrison29/default.htm
Gary's BtVS Fanfiction -
http://psycho.simplenet.com/fanfiction/index.mv?index+buf
Please let me know if I've left someone out, or if one of the URLs is
in error. Anyone who isn't listed here who wants to archive my
stories is welcome to, just let me know so I can add you to the list.
Thanks.
FEEDBACK: Constructive comments are encouraged.
SUMMARY: (Buffy/Willow) Willow discovers that there is more to her
than meets the eye, and it could tear her life apart.

Part the Ninth

Willow looked as if she had been struck. "Wha...No, that's not
possible." She looked at Buffy for support, and Buffy just looked
back at her, sadly.

"How did this happen, Willow?" Nichole asked, her voice deathly quiet.

"It...it was Oz, my ex-boyfriend." She felt numb, and stared at the
burn as if she could make it disappear through willpower alone.

"What happened?" Nichole asked, looking to Buffy for help.

"Oz showed up last night," Buffy began, in a hushed voice. "He had
been gone for a long time, he was off trying to deal with his werewolf
side, and yesterday he showed up on the doorstep. He and Willow
talked for a while, and then I heard Willow calling out that he was
hurting her. I ran out here, and he had grabbed her forearm and was
holding onto it. So I got him to let go, and threw him out."

"If he's Wyrm-tainted..." Chris trailed off, ominously.

"No!" Willow yelled, snatching her arm from Nichole's grasp. "He's
not a bad person! He was just confused, he just needed help... He said
he met someone, a hitchhiker in the New Mexico desert. That person
took him back to some place called Caern, where he taught him how to
control the change." Just like you taught me, Willow thought
silently.

"_A_ Caern," Nichole corrected, gently. "A place of spiritual power."
She and Chris exchanged glances. "Only two tribes have Caerns in that
area: Wendigo, who do not allow any non-Native Americans to join
their tribe, and..."

"And Black Spiral Dancers," Chris finished.

"We've got to help him," Willow said, eyes filling with tears. "We
can't just let him go on with them, we've got to find some way to help
him."

Nichole looked at Willow, compassion and sadness evident in her eyes.
"Willow," she said quietly, "there's only one way to help him, and
that's to free him from his torment. Release him from this life, so
he can go on to the next."

"You mean kill him," Willow said, flatly. She wiped her eyes, and
stared at Nichole angrily. "I can't do that, and I won't let you do
it, either."

Buffy stepped forward. "Will, we can't let him go if he's going to go
on to hurt other people..."

"He won't," Willow said, drawing back. "He's not a bad person, he was
just confused. There's got to be a cure." She looked at Chris, and
pointed a finger at him accusingly. "You said that Garou can renounce
their tribe. Choose another one. Well, we'll just give him the
chance to do that."

Chris shook his head. "Willow, it isn't that easy in this case. When
a werewolf becomes a Black Spiral, voluntarily or not, they're forced
to go through a ritual which breaks their mind. It makes them insane,
and makes them _want_ to serve the Wyrm. Even if we could get through
to him, he wouldn't want to change tribes, and his Wyrm-taint is so
great that no tribe would have him anyway."

"So are you going to kill me?" Willow asked, brokenly. She held up
her burned arm. "I have Wyrm-taint on me, too."

"No," Chris replied slowly, "We can cure that."

"So why can't you cure Oz?" Willow was starting to shake now, but
whether it was from remorse, fear, or anger no one could tell.

"Because there's no way to remove the Wyrm-taint from a Black Spiral
Dancer," Chris replied, losing his patience. "Even if we wanted to,
we just can't cure them!"

"We can't," Nichole interrupted, softly. "But there might be beings
that can."

Chris looked at Nichole, sharply. "That's insane, you're talking
about..." He threw his hands up in the air in disgust.

"I'm talking about the Gurahl," Nichole finished. 

Willow looked from Nichole, to Chris, and back again. "You know
someone who can help us?"

Nichole shrugged. "I don't know, but if anyone can, they can."

"This is ludicrous!" Chris exclaimed. "Even if we can _find_ a
Gurahl, and even if we can get them to talk to us, there's no
guarantee that they'll actually help us."

Buffy looked at the Garou, puzzled by the conversation. "What's a
Gurahl?"

Nichole sighed. "Everyone should take a seat. This is a long story."

* * *

"A long time ago, long before the Wyrm was corrupted, all beings lived
in peace with one another. There were many different kinds of
were-folk back then. The Garou, or werewolves, were not the only
members of the Changing Breeds; many other races straddled the line
between animal and human.

"There were the Nuwisha, or Werecoyotes. Tricksters all, they forced
us to question our ways through the use of pranks and practical jokes.

"There were the Corax, or Wereravens. They were the spies and
messengers of the Changing Breeds.

"There were the Bastet, or Werecats. As cats do, they watch and
protect, and have an insatiable curiosity for knowledge and secrets.

"There were the Ratkin, or Wererats. They were the shepherds of
mankind, both protecting the cities from the Wyrm, and holding check
on the human population to make sure it didn't get out of control.

"There were the Moloke, or Werealligators. They protected the swamps
and deepest jungles from harm.

"There were the Rokea, or Weresharks. As the Moloke did in the
swamps, the Rokea protected the deep oceans from harm.

"There were the Anasasi, or Werespiders. Servants of the Weaver, they
were the builders of the Changing Breeds.

"And there were the Gurahl, or Werebears. Perhaps the Changing Breed
that was closest to Gaia, the Gurahl were peaceful folk who grew adept
at healing the land, the other Breeds, and each other. Their skill
grew so great that it was said that they knew the secrets of life and
death, and could raise creatures from the dead using their Spirit
Gifts.

"There were many other Changing Breeds as well, and all lived together
in peace.

"Then the Wyrm became Corrupted, and began sending His minions out to
destroy life, to bring it under His dominion. The Changing Breeds
worked together for awhile, and enjoyed great success in their fight
against the Wyrm. The Garou were Gaia's warriors, the Corax were Her
spies, the Bastet were Her guardians, and the Gurahl were Her healers.

"And then came the War of Rage.

"Few know how it started. Legend has it that the Garou, particularly
the Silver Fang Tribe which ruled over the others, demanded that the
other were-breeds bow to them, and obey their orders in the war
against the Wyrm. After all, the Garou were Gaia's chosen warriors,
it seemed only right that the other breeds obey.

"But they didn't see it that way, of course. The other breeds
refused, and the Garou, believing that if the other breeds turned
against them they must be allies with the Wyrm, began to war against
the other were-folk.

"It was our darkest time. We lost many of the advantages and gifts
that we had received from our peaceful co-existence with the other
breeds, and many innocent were-folk on all sides were needlessly
slaughtered. All because the Garou could not contain their Rage, nor
their vanity."

* * *

Nichole fell silent; the others sat stock-still. Finally, Buffy broke
the silence. "I guess the Garou haven't always been the
happy-go-lucky pups you are now, huh?"

Chris snorted. "Still aren't. There are still a lot of us that can
think of nothing else than building up their own renown, or capturing
power however they can, even if it means flirting dangerously close to
the Wyrm. The Garou have made a lot of stupid moves over the years,
and the War of Rage was just one of them."

"So these Gurahl, these werebears, can help us?" Willow said, quietly.

Nichole shrugged. "It's possible. After the War of Rage, the Gurahl
withdrew from the world, hiding themselves away in remote locations
where they wouldn't be bothered by man or Garou. They are peaceful,
though, and I doubt they would hurt you if you went looking for one.
I can't tell if they'd help you or not, but they probably wouldn't
hurt you."

"Forget it." Chris shook his head, vehemently. "There's no way.
Willow is far too young and untested a pup to go searching for a
Gurahl. And what if the Black Spiral comes back? Are we supposed to
tell him, 'Oh, just take a seat there, Willow will be back shortly to
make everything better.' He'll try to kill us. The only thing we can
do is put him down--"

"Listen, you bastard," Willow said, teeth clenched. "You're talking
about my friend, the person who at one time I was in love with. If
there's anything at all I can do to help him, I'm going to do it. And
if you try to stop me, it will be _your_ tribe that I'm going to
renounce." Ignoring Chris's shocked look, she sat back, arms folded
across her chest.

Nichole stepped between the two before Chris's Rage could kick in.
"Ok, listen. Chris, you know as well as I do that every pup has to
undergo a quest before they receive the Rite of Passage and become a
full member of the tribe. I can't think of a better or more useful
quest right now, to be perfectly honest."

Chris opened his mouth to speak, and then closed it again. He
couldn't argue with the truthfulness of her words.

Nichole relaxed a bit. "I can speak with the Wyld-spirits in the
area, see if I can get a general location on the closest Gurahl.
After that, it will be up to Willow." She turned to face the young
redhead. "Generally, the quest is given to an entire pack of Garou,
but you are just one lone person. I don't think it's unreasonable for
you to take at least one other person with you, for assistance." She
shot Chris a look, but the Glass Walker just nodded.

Willow glanced at her best friend. "Buffy?"

Buffy nodded immediately. "I'd go anywhere with you, Will." She
glanced over at Giles. "Think you could handle patrol for a couple
weeks?"

"I think so, yes," Giles answered. "I'll get Xander and Spike to help
me."

"Well, then, it's settled," Nichole said, with some satisfaction.

"Not so fast," Chris said, sourly. "What happens if laughing boy
shows up?"

"We're going to have to capture him until we return," Buffy said,
matter-of-factly. "How do you deal with prisoners among your kind?
I'm assuming you don't kill them _all_."

Chris gave Buffy a sarcastic look. "We use a fetish, which is a
magical talisman that has had a spirit bound within it. It's a pair
of manacles which traps the wearer in Homid form, making him both
weaker and easier to manage. I could, presumably, have a pair here by
tomorrow morning if I tell them to FedEx it Priority."

"Modern technology, gotta love it," Buffy remarked. "Ok, then, sounds
like we've all got a plan."

* * *

Buffy sighed, closing the door behind Nichole after she left. "Well,
that was a lot of fun," she remarked.

Willow smiled crookedly, rubbing a pink spot on her arm. That was the
only evidence left that there had once been a bad burn there; Nichole
had healed the Wyrm-taint, and new skin began to grow in its place.

"Will, I gotta ask you," Buffy said, slowly walking toward her friend.
"This whole thing with Oz...Is it really worth it?"

"Don't, Buffy." Willow shook her head. "You of all people should
understand. Oz is our friend..."

"Yeah, but he's evil now. He doesn't even remember our friendship, or
he doesn't care. He doesn't want to be helped, and we may not even be
able to help him."

"Maybe we can't," Willow said, earnestly. "But we can't sit here and
do nothing. He needs our help whether he asks for it or not...
Whether he knows it or not."

"But, Will, we may have no choice--"

"If we don't have a choice, then we'll kill him!" Willow said, looking
Buffy in the eye, her expression angry. "Or have you forgotten Angel?
We didn't stop looking for a way to give him back his soul, even
though we thought maybe it wasn't possible. Even though he killed the
people we loved, and sent some of us to the hospital."

Buffy winced, Willow's harsh words opening up old wounds. She dropped
her head, and said quietly, "I know, Will. I'm the one who tried to
kill him, who sent him to Hell even after he got his soul back,
remember?" She turned abruptly and walked to the window, looking out
on the sunlit lawn beyond, her expression unreadable.

Oh, God, Willow thought, that was uncalled for. She walked up behind
the Slayer, and gently rested her hands on Buffy's shoulders. Her
friend immediately stiffened under her touch. "I'm sorry, Buffy.
I...I didn't mean for it to sound like that. I'm scared." Her head
drooped, and she rested her forehead against Buffy's shoulder. "A
part of me wishes that Oz hadn't come back, that I could go on
thinking he was ok, that he was just out there, somewhere, doing his
own thing. But he did come back, and I have to help him. I don't
love him anymore, but he is a part of my life, and rightly or wrongly
I feel some responsibility."

Buffy turned and wrapped her arms around Willow, drawing her into a
close hug. The redhead, not expecting this act of forgiveness, of
love, began crying with relief. Shoulders shaking, she allowed Buffy
to tighten her grip around her.

"Shhh, it's ok, Will," Buffy said, quietly. "I understand. And don't
worry, I'll help you no matter what happens."

Willow smiled, and wrapped her arms around the Slayer. "Thank you,"
she whispered.

Buffy kissed the top of Willow's head, and said, "Guess we got some
planning to do, huh? I'm not sure what to pack, I've never been the
outdoorsy type." She moved one hand up under Willow's chin and lifted
her head up so she could see her face. Gently brushing away her
tears, Buffy swallowed around the lump in her throat that had formed
from seeing her friend's beautiful, tear-stained face.

Willow looked up and met Buffy's eyes with her own. Those eyes...
they mesmerized her, made it impossible for her to feel sad, or alone.
They were eyes that said, you have nothing to fear, I'll always be
here for you. "You always support me, Buffy," she whispered. "Even
though I don't always deserve it. You've always been there for me."
She reached up a tentative hand, to cup Buffy's cheek. Buffy's
eyelids closed slowly, and the Slayer leaned into the caress. "I love
you, Buffy."

Buffy opened her eyes, and looked down at her best friend, the person
she loved more than any other. "I love you too, Willow." Whether she
leaned down or Willow reached up, no one could tell, but at that
moment their lips met.

The kiss was gentle and tentative, as if neither one were sure that
this is what the other wanted. Willow brought her hands up, cupping
the back of Buffy's head, deepening the kiss. Buffy, in turn, brought
her arms around Willow's waist, holding her closely to her. Long
moments went by, moments where nothing else in the world existed for
the pair except each other.

Finally, they broke the kiss. Foreheads touching, each young woman
noticed the labored breathing of the other. As one, they smiled.
Speech became unnecessary, and superfluous.

Willow took Buffy's hands in her own, led her into the back bedroom,
and closed the door.


END Part 9

Erin
-- 
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*email: erin@xxxxxxxxxxx