Revelations
by Kit
[reviews]
Chapter 1:
The Past Remembered
Buffy Summers, a lovely blond headed young woman, was packing up her dorm room for the final time. She picked up a picture of her and a lovely red headed woman, her best friend and lover Willow Rosenburg. Tears were streaming down her face. They were so happy then. She had kept the same room they had always had, but had it as a single after her friend, lover and confidant left.
"It seems like yesterday, Wills," she sighed.
**She watched Willow from a near by tree as they, her friends, waited for her to come to school.
Oh guys, she thought, I don't know whether to stay or go. Xander, you finally got your wish, Angel is history. Oh Willow, I could never tell you that I love you. That I have been in love with you since the moment I saw you.
She looked down at her duffel bag and knelt beside it. As she stood up, a hand gently touched her shoulder.
"Don't," a familiar voice said.
She turned quickly and stared in awe. It was like looking at a mirror, only this one showed an older version of her.
"What," she asked.
"Listen, Buffy, I am yourself from another time. You run away and lose what ever you had with Willow. If you leave, she will die. No, not now, but in the future. You blame yourself and leave Sunnydale to rot. You leave your mother and your friends to die. Trust me, I know. I'm your future self."
"Willow is going to die? How?"
"Angelus. He returns and he gets his revenge. Come on Anne, you know why you are running. Not because of Angel sure you loved him, but it is that fiery red head that has your heart. She has had it since the day you met. She knows it too."
"How?"
"She takes a sword to the heart for you, for me. She dies in your arms, my arms, and the last thing she says is I love you."
The younger Buffy drops the bag and looks back to her friend in the wheelchair.
"I'd almost lost her this time, I couldn't stand if it happened again," younger Buffy said.
"Go to her."
The older Buffy disappeared and the younger one grabbed her bag and headed to the school.
"Hey Wills," she sheepishly said, dropping her duffel bag.
"Buffy," Willow exclaimed, then looked over to Xander, "Told you."
Buffy kneeled in front of her, taking her hand. Tears were streaming down her face as she looked into those lovely green eyes.
"Buff? Why do you have your duffel bag?"
"I was going to leave, because of what happened."
"What stopped you?"
"A realization."
"What do you mean?"
"If I left, I would be losing the best thing in my life. You Willow."
"Me?"
"I'll explain in due time. I am still expelled, so I am going home to talk to my mom."
"Ok. Buffy?"
"Yeah?"
"I love you."
"Love you too, Willow, always."
Buffy stood up and kissed Willow's forehead. She then grabbed her bag and headed home. Her mother was still dumbfounded by the note. When her daughter came knocking at her door, tears of joy streamed down her face. She hugged Buffy, not wanting to let her go. Finally the two women sat down and had a long conversation. Her mother called the school, and found out that Giles had gotten Buffy re-instated. She would start back the next week.
That night, Buffy headed over to Willow's house. Willow was upstairs in her room. Buffy lightly knocked on the door.
"Come in."
Buffy entered the room, and her eyes feel on Willow. She walked over and sat on Willow's bed.
"Hey," Buffy said.
"Hey," Willow replied.
"How are you?"
"Still kind of scared you know."
"Yeah, me too. Will, I have to tell you something."
"What?"
"Angelus was Angel when I killed him. It's not your fault. I was too late. Acaltha was already opening the portal. It had to be done."
"Oh Buffy, I'm sorry."
"I'm ok, honest Will. I was more frightened at the fact that I could have lost you."
"What do you mean?"
"I was going to leave Will, I was going to go and not come back. But something stopped me. My future self stopped me. Made me realize something too."
"Future self?"
"Yeah. Came back to stop me from leaving you."
"Me?"
"Don't you see Will? Why did Angelus go after you?"
"Because I could give him back his soul."
"No, because I was in love with you, because I am in love with you."
Buffy stood up and walked to the window, tears streaming down her face.
"My future self told me how you died, and how I just left after you died. I never told you how I felt because you have Oz, and I was with Angel. It always seems that if something goes wrong, I leave. I pack up and run away. Not this time. I want in, Willow. I want to be with you more than anything I know."
"Buffy, come back to the bed."
Buffy walked over and sat next to Willow.
"Buffy, when you sat next to me, everything stopped for me. Time stood still. Oz and I are just friends now. It wasn't working. He decided that he was going to head out after high school to figure out how to control his wolf."
"What are you saying Will?"
"I love you, Buffy Summers. You had my heart when we met."
They just stared at each other, smiling. **
Buffy finished packing up her belongings. She then sat down on her bed, holding her head down. She put the radio on, and listened to the song that was on. It was the end of a sad love song.
Oh, this is just great. All I need is my heart re-broken. What did I do? I still don't know. I love her so much. I never thought we'd last this long, but we did. But now, I lost it. Willow. I love you, she thought.
Then one of her favorite songs came on.
"This is going out to all the couples out there that are fighting right now. Love will find a way," the DJ spoke smoothly.
The lyrics haunted her.
Walk blindly to the light and reach out for his hand
Don't ask any questions and don't try to understand
Open up your mind and then open up your heart
You will see that you and me aren't very apart
Cause I believe, that love is the answer
I believe, love will find a way
Violence has spread worldwide
And there's families on the street
We sell drugs to children, now why can't we just see
That all we do is eliminate our future
With the things we do today
Money is our incentive now, so that makes it ok
And I believe, love is the answer
I believe, love will find a way
I believe, that love is the answer
I believe, love will find a way
I've been seeing Lisa now for a little over a year
She says she never been so happy, but Lisa lives in fear
That one day daddy's gonna find out she's in love
With a nigger from the street
Oh how he would lose it then, but she's still here with me
Cause she believes that love will see it through, and they will understand
And he'll see me as a person, not just a black man
Cause I believe, that love is the answer
I believe, that love will find a way
I believe, I believe, I believe, I believe
Love is the answer
I believe, love will find a way
Love will find a way
Love will find a way
Love will find a way
Love will find a way
Love will find a way
Love will find a way
Love will find a way
(Blessed Union of Souls, I Believe)
Buffy wiped the tears from her eyes when the song was over and sat up. She grabbed the last box and looked around the room one last time.
"Goodbye, Willow."
She shut the light out and locked the door behind her. She headed down to her black Jeep Cherokee and put the last box in the back. She got in the driver's side and started up the car. She pulled away from UC Sunnydale, hopefully, for the last time. She returned back to her mother's home and unpacked the Jeep. Her mother was so proud that her daughter graduated college. But she was still the slayer, first and foremost.
Joyce, her mom, knew her daughter was still hurting over Willow's departure. Willow had gotten an offer of a lifetime. She was a junior in college when she received the letter. It was from Harvard. They wanted her to help them start up their own demonology department. She and Buffy were still together, and their relationship was very strong, but when Buffy found out about the offer, she shut down. She didn't want Willow wasting her life because of her.
**Willow just stared at Buffy, tears flowing from her eyes.
"Buffy, damn it! Why are you closing down on me like this?"
"Wills, just go. You need to have a life."
"I told you, I want to help people. You have a good fight here."
"And you can have a life out there! Go to Harvard Willow. You don't need me."
"Buffy, don't say that. I do need you. I love you."
Buffy cringed when Willow said that. Buffy knew she would have to stoop really low to get Willow ticked enough for her to leave.
"Well I don't need you! I don't love you! Get the hell out of my life."
"Buffy you don't mean that. I know you better than that."
She was right. Willow knew everything about Buffy. She knew her strengths, faults, and those fuzzy things that made her cry. She turned towards Willow.
"Go, if not for yourself, then for me. Move on, Wills. Slayers don't have a long life span."
"You do Buffy! You've lasted this long."
"And who is to say that I might not live to see graduation. Damn it Will, I want you to go. And I'll do anything to push you away from me so you will go."
"Buffy?"
"Damn it, Will, just go."
Buffy walked away from Willow and didn't return back to the dorm till after Willow left. She cried herself to sleep each night after that. **
"Rupert, we have to do something," Joyce said, over the phone.
"Yes, I agree. Buffy pushed Willow away so she could have her own life. What she failed to realize is, that she was Willow's life. Willow needed her more than anything else in the world."
"Has Willow called you?"
"Yes, on more than one occasion."
"She has called here too. Buffy is dying Rupert."
"Dying?"
"A broken heart."
"They both are. Willow is coming back tomorrow."
"I know. Rupert, Buffy cries herself to sleep every night after patrol."
"This is worse than I thought, isn't it?"
"Yes it has. I mean my phone bills alone are proof enough. She kept calling Angel, and he in turn called her. She even called Willow, just to hear her say, 'Hello.'"
"Oh dear."
"Listen, I have to go. I will talk to you later, Rupert."
"Yes, ok. Talk to you later. Bye."
"Bye."
Joyce hung up the phone and it was that right then and there she knew what she had to do. She dialed Willow's number and was hoping to help things.
"Hello," a shy voice answered.
"Willow?"
"Mrs. Summers, is that you?"
"Yeah."
"Hey, how are you? I was just taking a break from packing."
"I'm fine Willow. But I am not calling because of me, but because of Buffy."
"Buffy? What's wrong? Is she ok?"
"Calm down Willow, she seems fine. But we both know that is not the case. She is so in love with you."
"I love her so much too. But she pushed me out remember. I didn't even date anyone else."
"I know, but I think in her own way she thought that she was doing the best thing for you. I mean you still could have gone, if the two of you talked it through in a mature manner."
"Where is Buffy now?"
"Out. She goes to work in the morning at a karate dojo in town, then comes home. She eats dinner, then goes on patrol. This is day in and day out. Sometimes she doesn't come home."
"She still blames herself, doesn't she?"
"Yes. She knows she pushed you away, but to her it was for a good reason. It was her way of saying I love you, but you deserve a life."
"I know. Oh goddess do I know. I miss her so much."
"I know you do. It has been over a year since the two of you talked. I was in her room the other week, and she had a shoe box full of letters written to you."
"What?"
"All of them stamped and addressed to your apartment around Harvard."
"But, she never sent them?"
"I think she thought you were mad at her. I hear her cry herself to sleep every night. Angel has called to check on her constantly. She even calls him, crying."
"Oh my goddess."
"Willow, she needs you and you need her."
"I'll be home tomorrow. Does she know?"
"No, she doesn't. Do you want me to tell her?"
"Tell me what," Buffy asked her mom.
Joyce didn't hear her daughter come home and was shocked to see her standing in front of her.
"Mrs. Summers, give Buffy the phone."
"Buffy, someone wants to talk to you."
Buffy took the phone away from her mom.
"Hello," Buffy asked.
"Hey," Willow's shy voice squeaked.
"Will? Is that you?"
"Yeah, Buffy."
Buffy started to cry. She had missed Willow so much. Buffy could hear Willow crying on the other end.
"Gods Will, I miss you."
"I miss you too. But I am coming home tomorrow."
"Really?"
"Yes. I want to get back together with you Buffy. I have never stopped loving you."
"I never stopped loving you either. Do you really want to get back together?"
"Yes! You are all I have ever wanted or needed. You pushed me away, and I stayed here till the end of my senior year. The program is up and running, and I am ready to come home to you."
"But what about your life?"
"Buffy, haven't you figured it out by now? You are my life. There hasn't been a day that I have not thought about you. It has been too long. It has been over a year Buffy. We were together since our senior year in high school. Your mom told me everything, Buffy. About the letters you never sent. About Angel calling you and you calling him crying. Goddess I love you Buffy Summers, I want to be with you forever."
"Willow, what are you saying?"
"You'll find out tomorrow, I promise. I need to go though. I have to pack up the rest of my clothing. I love you. My plane arrives around 12 PM tomorrow. Be there?"
"Anything for my Wills."
"I love you Buffy."
"I love you too."
"See you tomorrow. Bye."
"Bye."
Buffy heard the phone click on the other end and dropped to her knees. She was sobbing as her mother came over to her and held onto her. She helped her daughter upstairs and laid her into bed.
"Sleep now baby. Tomorrow you will be whole again," Joyce whispered as she left the room.
Buffy fell into a dreamless sleep. She woke at sunrise and headed to the shower. She just let the warm water engulf her body as she slumped against the wall. She got out after awhile, then headed down stairs. Joyce was up as well. She watched her daughter act as if she was in a dream state.
"Buffy?"
"Yeah mom?"
"I'll drive you to the airport to pick up Willow."
Buffy walked over to her mother and hugged her tightly.
"Thank you. I don't think I could have done it myself."
"Its ok. Everything is going to be ok."