Down Twisted
by drkdreamer
Chapter 23
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The compact blonde stood just outside the closed bedroom door trying, desperately, to calm to immense amount of trepidation that was quelling around inside her stomach. With a hard mental slap to her brain, and a resolute shake of her shoulders, Buffy began turning the shiny, gold handle. The Slayer truly thought she'd be ready
but the sight that caught her eyes, literally, obliterated that sense of hope. Alexandra Roberts was laying flat on her back atop the bedcovers staring, sightlessly it seemed, up at the off-white ceiling. The redhead was, once again, standing at the bedroom window
and Buffy ached as she watched the other girl's silent tears fall towards the uncaring floor.
"Wills?"
The Witch turned and locked gazes with her concerned lover. Buffy Summers hazel, blue eyes flickered, constantly, around the room but what really caught Willow's attention was how the strong Slayer was trying to appear as if she where still in total control. "Look dammit, look at what Alex was holding against her heart."
The other girl's eyes automatically glanced down at the photo Willow was holding in her left hand. That gaze widened after seeing just what image that picture contained and her heart grieved all over again for the dark Southerner.
"She never even noticed when I took it from her. God, Buffy, what are we going to do about Alex?"
The confusion in that pain-filled voice compelled the Slayer to cross the short distance that was separating them and enfold the desperate redhead with a loose embrace.
"I dunno, Will. It will probably be hard but I believe we just need to be here for Alex."
The Hacker/Witch, silently, acknowledged that she would have it no other way. The older woman meant the world to Willow because that girl, damn well, knew she and Buffy would still be floundering around in a state of confusion, instead of finally being together, and it was mostly due to the dark Southerner's persistence. However,
mirrored within that emotion was the realization that she and Buffy, in all likelihood, where the sole people who Might be able to jerk Alexandra Roberts out from the confines of her own mindset. Willow, being far from a stupid girl, also knew she wasn't emotionally ready to fully process that information yet, so she put it on the back
burner.
Buffy, who'd been thinking along the same lines, drew a small amount of strength from simply continuing to hold her lover and best friend. The Slayer knew, as surely as the sun would rise tomorrow morning, that they'd eventually have to talk about their equally
troubling thoughts. In all honesty, the blonde was dreading the day that would happen. After listening to Alex's rather complicated formative years, she could no longer try and deny that only certain...things would bring the dark woman back to herself. There
was never any doubt that Willow would do, almost anything, to helpAlexandra Katherine Roberts. But, and this was a truly massive but, Buffy couldn't really believe that her tender hearted lover would have the mental fortitude to get naked-n-sweaty if other people where in the same room with her. To be sure, Wills had heroutrageous moments but, at heart, her lover was a very traditional girl. Buffy firmly banished those thoughts as she brushed a gentle kiss across the Witch's lips and then took a small step back.
"You know, Will, it occurs to me that neither one of us has eaten yet. Don't know about you but I'm starving over here. Let's go to the kitchen, I'll fix us some sandwiches and we can discuss this some more. "'Kay, Wills?"
Grateful for any kind of distraction, the Wicca walked over to the dresser to lay the tear stained photo atop its sturdy surface. With one last look at Alex, Willow headed for the door.
"Coming, lover? I can clearly hear an ice, cold Coke calling me by name."
Buffy Anne Summers was dryly chuckling to herself as she exited the bedroom. Meanwhile, the dark clad figure on the bed still hadn't moved a muscle. Alex was trying to stay afloat on the dark currents that ran in the abyss that was her own mind. It was a cold, utterly silent place that offered her nothing but total absolution. On some
basic level, Alex was faintly aware of her surroundings. It was however a wholly intuitive feeling because there seemed to be nothing but a gray space behind her eyes. Try as she might, and she had tried, no words would come from her throat. Thankfully, her hearing was still present but it had a radically muted aspect. The
cognizant part of Alexandra Roberts wished there where some way she could reassure Buffy and Willow. They where in a great deal of emotional pain because of her but alas, she had no way to tell them anything. The dark, gray gaze blinked, just once, because Alex had never really considered the possibility that she'd ever be back inside this cold place. There was only one thought process going on inside that woman's mind and the thought was repeated again and again.
Dear God, I know we've had our differences but, if you could see it within your heart, please don't let the same amount of time pass before I can free myself once again.