Last Confessions
by blacksheep
[reviews]
When she first sat down at her laptop the sun was shining brightly between the gaps in the curtains. Little over an hour ago she had to turn on her desk lamp. She stood and started to stretch her sore back as the printer gave a wail and started to churn out her latest assignment. In the dimly lit space she could see the chest at the end of the bed had been opened and some of its contents removed. Trust Buffy she thought sneaking in here to collect her supplies for patrol, she knows better than to disturb studious Willow. She let out a little sigh at the 'sneaking' part, too much for too long had the best friends been sneaking about in an attempt to avoid the other.
It was now 5 hours since she had turned on her lamp, and the contents of the chest were still missing. Several candles were now shimmering in the darkness as the room's only occupant lay back on her bed fighting back tears. Buffy should of returned by now, she prayed for her best friends return and at the same time she wished she would just disappear becoming only a faded memory. The shrill of the telephone woke her from her self- inflicted agony. After numerous moments of straining to hear the voice on the opposite end, she had become the poster girl for panic, pacing between the two beds and babbling hysterically. She was now faced with a choice of swallowing what little pride she had left and playing the best friend or sticking by her guns and wallow in self pity.
The ride in the elevator went far too quickly, the red head had little time to rehearse her speech. However has the elevator doors slid open she realised maybe she wouldn't need the speech anymore. It wasn't the first time she had been on this hospital ward, and it hadn't changed since her last visit. To her left was a small nurses station that housed patient charts and nurses who spoke in sorrowful whispers. The lights were dimmed and lifeless faces were shadowed. All was silent apart from the regular hum of life support machines, and the occasional sniff from the crying relative. She walked over to her adopted family who were huddled together inside the waiting room.
As soon as she entered, Dawn ran over and wrapped her arms around her, squeezing her tight and wetting Willows neck with tears. Xander stared straight ahead not acknowledging her presence he had that glint of anger in his eye that Willow knew well. Giles shifted nervously on his chair, probably cleaning his glasses for the umpteenth time Willow thought. Seeing her family like this made her knees buckle and her eyes burn. Just as she was about to breakdown she reminded herself to be strong, right now they needed someone to be strong. She repeated this to herself like a mantra, calming the others, reassuring them it would be okay, while she herself knew it wasn't okay this time, not on this ward.
The nurse let her into the room. All lights were off, only the gloomy glow from the numerous machines illuminated the room. Willow took the chair next to the bed and smiled at her best friend. As Buffy tried to sit up Willow shook her head and placed one hand on her friends abdomen gently pushing her back on to the bed. They stayed like this for what seemed like an age until the redhead found her voice.
"How are you Buffy?"
She didn't know why she'd asked, she knew the standard reply and she was right. Buffy assured her that she was a 'okay and there was nothing to worry about' but Willow could tell by the grimace on her friends face whenever she shifted in her bed that Buffy was only trying to make her feel better. Knowing making small talk with Buffy was always a pointless exercise, Willow jumped straight in.
"I'm so sorry Buffy I should have kept my feelings to myself and none of this would of happened."
Willow looked up nervously to meet Buffy's gaze but it was not at all what she expected, instead of a look of hatred she was greeted with pure and utter confusion radiating from those hazel eyes.
"Willow I'm sorry I'm not following..."
"I'm sorry I told you I loved you," Willow sputtered.
Still staring into those hazel pools Willow noticed a sudden change in her friend's demeanour. After a long pause Buffy spoke, her voice cracked with emotion, her eyes pleading for something Willow didn't quite understand.
" D-didn't you mean it? D-don't you love me anymore?"
Willow couldn't comprehend what she was hearing. In front of her was the girl who had avoided her for weeks, the girl who had effectively ended their friendship after her declaration of love, this same girl who currently seemed to be begging Willow to love her....
"I'm sorry I freaked Will, I was scared, terrified even, I don't think I've been so scared in my life and that's saying something for a slayer. Have you noticed Will how my near death and in one case death experience seems to give me a little wisdom?" The Slayer ended her diatribe with a little smirk.
Willow didn't understand, she was sure whatever medication Buffy was on was affecting her in some way. Noticing Buffy's somewhat wicked grin she opened her mouth to speak. Only to be stopped by a set of soft lips pressed against hers. The kiss was soft and all said things words could not.
"I love you Willow."
Willow was just about to reply when Buffy let out a groan and the machine at her bedside screeched at a much higher pitch than before. The nurse who let Willow into the room rushed in, followed by a doctor. Willow stood back watching their frantic attempts to save Buffy. Shutting her eyes unable to watch any longer she leaned against the wall until she felt a gentle tap on her arm.
"I'm sorry miss but there was nothing else we could do for her."
End.
A/N: This is my first fic and I have no idea what others think so please review, I wrote it a long time ago and have been struggling with a second so whatever you think please tell me.