A New Start
by Bwriter
Chapter ninetine: Safe
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Chapter nineteen: Safe
"Incredible." Giles was the first to find his voice. He was looking at his Slayer/Vampire in awe.
"What is? That my girlfriend had been sending and receiving information to and from Traver's and she didn't even trust me enough to tell me?!?" Xander was hurt. He didn't love Karen but he liked her a lot. He was in love with someone else, but it was someone he could never have and would never be good enough for.
"Actually I was talking about the fact that Buffy is purring. As the Slayer I had heard her purr when Willow was around, but as a vampire... I was unaware that they could. Very few have ever purred. Very few of them feel safe, happy and relaxed enough to allow it to happen."
At the sound of his voice, Buffy stopped purring and turned to face her Watcher and friend. Willow turned to look at Buffy.
"I make you feel safe?" Willow was shocked. Buffy had always been the protector of the group what with her being the Slayer and all, but to hear that the Buffy and ergo the Slayer only felt safe when she was around made Willow feel like the strongest person on earth. She liked that feeling.
Buffy turned to face her lover. Looking her in the eyes and speaking from the heart she answered her.
"What did you think it was? I always have to be the strong one, the person who fights evil and takes care of everyone, but when I'm with you its like all that is insignificant to a degree. I like feeling that way. Its only happened with you with is why I always knew that you were Mine. These last six months have been hell." Taking a breath she no longer need she tried to compose her emotions.
"I felt that I had to stay away to keep you safe, well not just you, all of you really. The longer I went with being able to see you but not touch was... I felt like I was loosing control. My Slayer wanted out to claim you again to know that you still belonged to me... us and my demon had become obsessed with you and it loves you just as much and I do, as the Slayer side of me does."
By this stage Buffy was feeling a little embarrassed that Giles and Xander were there to hear everything but she was worried about what Willow was feeling about her demon being in love with her. She was also getting a little unnerved by Willow's silence and the fact that she was just standing there staring at her like a bug under a microscope.
Willow was amazed. She couldn't get over the fact that Her lover who happened to be a Slayer AND a Vampire felt safe with her. She was snapped out of her trance when she felt Buffy withdraw from her touch. Snapping her gaze to Buffy's eyes she could read the hurt that Buffy was desperately trying to cover up.
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Willow had stood to long just staring so Buffy figured that maybe her lover wasn't as okay with things as she had hoped. She really didn't know how she was going to cope with not being able to just throw Willow up against the nearest solid surface and claim her Mate again. Maybe if she just had a slayer inside her screaming for it to happen or maybe even just a vamp she could resist but having both and being around Willow was taking up every ounce of control she had ever mastered. Hiding her hurt and pain she was starting to retreat from Willow when she felt and smelt the change in her lover.
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Willow knew that she had to have Buffy and soon. She knew that even after everything that had happened that her lover still doubted her love for her so she knew she had to show her, but for now she just had to convince her with words.
Walking the few steps that Buffy had put between them she took her lover's face in her hands and like Buffy, she spoke from the heart.
"You have no idea how that makes me feel. I'm not even sure I could put it into words but I'm gonna have to because I can't purr the way you do. Ever since we first met it's always been you looking out for me. You even tried warning me off incase our being together meant I got hurt. You took the pain you were worried I would have to bare and you did it selflessly. When you first got vamped you could have came to me, I wouldn't have turned you away but I know you needed that time to figure things out and I'm glad that you did. I like the feeling that I'm the only person you have ever purred with, the only person you are ever gonna purr with. I love knowing that even when you're facing another Slayer, who granted you could take in a fight with your arms tied behind your back, you are still happy and content and most of all feel safe enough to purr."
Turning her head she whispered for Buffy's ears only; "I love you and I really want you right now."
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Buffy had tears running down her face but they were tears of happiness. Hearing Willow confess her feelings had swept away all the doubt that had once again filled Buffy's head and heart. However hearing her say that she loved her and wanted her took Buffy's body to an unknown state of arousal. Unable to and no longer wanting to fight the wants of both Slayer and Demon she turned to Giles said a quick bye and see you later, picked Willow up and disappeared from the library all in a heartbeat.