Reactions and Admissions
by DawnBTVS
Reactions and Admissions
[reviews]
Title: Reactions and Admissions
Author: DawnBTVS
Disclaimer: All characters and settings belong to Joss Whedon.
Rating: R for Graphic Violence
Warning: Don't read if F/F pairings make you run screaming into the night.
Distribution: Wiffy-Dreamverse and Buffy Wants Willow.
Feedback: Would certainly be appreciated.
Spoilers: Up to Xander slamming the phone down on Willow in Prophecy Girl.
Pairings: Buffy/Willow
Summary: Willow gets no response from Xander but receives a phone call from a certain Slayer, needing to talk with her.
Author's Note: Thanks to Erin for being my beta. This is my first Wiffy fic (2nd fic overall).
I sighed, and stared hard at the phone in my hand. Xander was my best friend, and we had known each other forever. I know he's hurting but I'm sure Buffy didn't mean it. She would never hurt him or I on purpose, not after the countless times she's saved our butts from certain death. 'He just needs time' I thought, rested the phone back on its cradle, and turned off my monitor. I pushed the chair back from the computer, and stood up. 'Angel has been sending signals to Buffy and vice versa, I mean hello, smoochies' I thought just as the phone rang. I glanced at the door, a rippling of fear running down my spine, and hoped my parents didn't hear. My mother wasn't big on people calling past 9 PM at the Rosenberg household. I walked up, lifted the receiver, and couldn't mask my surprise.
"Buffy?" I asked, surprised that the blonde was calling. Well, okay, not that surprised considering we talk almost nightly, but Buffy didn't sound like Buffy. She wasn't upbeat and fun and engaging. 'Okay, shooting down Xander might have a big aid in that' I thought.
"Hey Will. So, what's up?" Buffy asked in a soft tone, as warning bells began clanging, and concern flared in my soul. Buffy never sounded this morose and well... depressed. I knew that there was something affecting my Buffy...'My Buffy?' I thought in confusion before Buffy's voice snapped me back.
"You there Will?" asked Buffy. She sounded scared, and I quickly resolved myself to make her feel better.
"I'm here, Buffy. You want to talk?" I asked, maybe a bit too hastily as silence met my remark. I closed my eyes, hoping that Buffy wouldn't turn me away. I was her best friend, and we talked about everything. 'Don't hold out on me Buff' I thought with worry, knowing whatever was bothering her was very important.
"Y-yeah. Uh, Will?" asked Buffy as my ears perked. I would be strong for her. She needed me right now, and there was no way I'd let her down.
"What Buff?" I asked, wondering what she'd be asking me. I wasn't prepared for her answer, at all.
"Could you come over, please?" she asked. 'It's a school night' was my immediate thought, soon followed by me mentally admonishing myself. I guess my gasp didn't help matters, either. "No, I'm sorry. It's a school night, and you're probably doing homework, and I'd be infringing on that, and it'd be wrong and-" Buffy babbled. I smiled, listening to her. 'She's cute when she babbles' I thought before my eyes widened in realization at what I thought. 'Not cute that way, not that she isn't cute because she is, in fact she's very cute but her babbling can't be cute...ugh' I chastised myself, and focused back on Buffy, hoping my internal thinking didn't cause Buffy to think I had passed out.
"I'd be glad to come over. You need me, and don't try and downplay it. I'll be over there in a few minutes. Let me just figure out a way to slip out. Hey, look at me, you've corrupted me into being secret agent gal," I joked, grinning as a laugh met me. It was nice to hear Buffy laughing.
"Thanks Will. This means a lot," Buffy murmured, and I could sense the sincerity. It made me feel tingly.
"Anything for you. Okay, I'll see ya in a few. Bye," I said, and hung up the phone after Buffy said bye. I looked around, and grabbed my backpack, throwing in a bottle of holy water and a couple crosses. Knowing Sunnydale, expecting the worst usually never met up to expectations. It was usually worse. I opened the door slowly, exhaling, and stepping out. 'One time I'm glad my parents sleep early' I thought, creeping down the hallway and down the steps. I quietly walked up to the front door, and grabbed the doorknob but froze in place at a couple of creaks upstairs. I heard the bathroom door close, and wasted no time getting out. 'My parents catching me would lead to a world of badness...although being out at night is badness in itself' I thought, opening my backpack, and pulling out a cross for protection.
~~~BTVS~~~
I walked up the driveway, and walked up to the front door but paused. 'What if Ms. Summers doesn't know I'm here? What if she yells at Buffy, and sends me home! Why, Buffy would be getting hurt because of me, and I don't want to hurt her' I thought, my mind rambling away, and completely oblivious to the door being opened. I looked up, and smiled at Buffy.
"He-" I managed to get out before Buffy grabbed me by the hand, and yanked me into the house. I looked at her, confused by her action. She stared over my shoulder, and pointed as I turned to see what she was pointing at.
"I hear knocking can speed up the process of getting the door open," Buffy remarked as she grabbed a stake, stepped out, and swiftly staked the charging vampire. I was still a bit shocked at what had transpired. I-I could've been a snack! I could've been a happy meal for that guy! Buffy turned, and smiled as Joyce stepped into the hallway, seemingly oblivious to what had just occurred.
"Hello Willow," Joyce said with a smile. I must've blanched because Buffy was instantly wrapping her arm around my shoulder. It felt nice. 'Okay...' I thought, my mind clearly trying to make me go insane. I glanced from Buffy's smiling face to Ms. Summers.
"H-Hi. I hope you're not mad with me being here because Buffy called, and she wanted me to come and if I didn't come then she'd be sad, and I don't want her to be sad because of me but then I thought you'd be angry if I came, so I didn't knock, and...I'll stop," I said, a little out of breath. Joyce had a look of amusement and concern, and Buffy shook me, a little too hard as I toppled to the ground.
"Willow! Sorry," Buffy said with a wince, as I sent up a weak smile to help allay her fears. I stood up, smoothing my shirt out, and looking at Buffy.
"I'm okay," I replied, as Joyce looked at Buffy.
"I hope you girls remember that it's a school night. Seeing as you're here, would you like to stay the night? I don't want to wake your parents at this hour," Joyce said as I looked at Buffy, nervousness and worry on my face.
"Will?" Buffy asked with slight worry coming over her eyes but vanishing just as quickly. I saw it though, and couldn't just leave her like this.
"Sure," I said. Buffy smiled and began tugging me up the stairs. I was trying to figure out why Buffy was so...happy. I'm good but I'm no miracle cure for depression. 'I'm not even approved by the FDA' I thought with a smirk. Buffy pulled me into her bedroom, closing the door. I sat down on the edge of her bed, eyeing her. I didn't want to bring up Xander but that was what was making her down...right? Buffy turned to face me, and I could see a tear starting to slide down her cheek.
"Buffy! What's wrong? Is it Xander?" I asked, tossing my backpack on the bed, and standing. Buffy just sniffled, and I walked to her, enveloping her in a hug. 'She's so soft' I thought, taking in the fragrance of her shampoo. 'She smells like oranges' I thought before I quickly shook my head. Buffy was hurting, and I needed to know why. I could feel her tears subsiding, and I pulled my head back but kept my arms wrapped around her. "What is it Buffy?" I asked, concern clearly evident in my voice. Buffy sniffled, and pulled her head back. I placed a finger on her cheek, wiping away a stray tear. Buffy leaned into my touch, and smiled. I smiled too but couldn't explain why this was feeling so good. 'You like her...but she likes Angel' I thought sadly.
"It was horrible, Will," Buffy said, swallowing a sob, as she pulled out of my embrace. I frowned at the loss of contact, as Buffy walked back to the bed, refusing to look at me. I took a step forward but kept my distance, deciding Buffy needed to get this off her chest. "He's my friend, Will. I love him but not like that. He seemed so heartfelt, though," Buffy said, sitting on the bed, pulling her knees up to her chest, and wrapping her arms around them. I sat down on the edge of the bed.
"I know; he's my best friend. If you didn't have those same feelings for him, though then it was best that you let him down. It'll hurt now but in the long term, he'll be better off for it," I said, trying to massage Buffy's guilt. I didn't want to ask but this had been bugging me. "Was it because of Angel?" I asked, a little fear in my voice. Buffy looked up, fresh tears welling up. She shook her head, as I looked at her in surprise.
"Angel's handsome, very handsome. Okay, a hottie. You said it yourself though, Will. He's a vampire, and I'm a vampire slayer. Our relationship would be filled with cryptic messages, and him not aging, and me hating him for it. I don't think I love him, though. I feel the way I do about Xander with Angel," Buffy said, as confusion was obviously on my face. "Will?" she asked, as I looked back at her, a bit startled. 'B-but...you kissed!' I thought.
"You guys had smoochies, though," I said, as if that was the definition of love. 'If ya smooch, then you're in love' I thought, as Buffy chuckled.
"Smoochies don't mean love, Will. They were okay but...there was something missing. I didn't feel this spark that people should feel when they're in love," Buffy said, as I nodded my head, trying to understand where she was coming from. Of course, I had never kissed, so it was kind of hard for me to make that same connection. Then a new thought hit me.
"I thought you were meeting with Giles?" I asked, as Buffy just looked down forlornly at her bed. I crawled forward to sit next to her. "Buff?" I asked, fearing the worst. "Please, look at me Buffy," I said, fear causing my voice to shake. Buffy looked up, tears now spilling down her cheeks again. I instantly hugged her, whispering soothings in her ear. I pulled back, the next action catching me by surprise. Buffy leaned forward, lips softly brushing mine but slowly pressing harder. 'This is nice...it's Buffy!' I thought, frantically trying to figure out what to do. Buffy pulled away, fear and worry in her eyes. I was a little out of breath, my eyes still closed, as I opened them. I smiled, and leaned forward, pulling Buffy towards me. 'My turn' I thought, as I captured her lips with mine. I felt my lips parting, allowing Buffy access to my tongue with hers. We were like that for a while before breaking apart. Both of us were breathing hard. My mind was whirling in a million different directions. "Wow," I gasped, as Buffy blushed, and looked away. I frowned, fear making my body go cold. "Did I do something wrong?" I asked, worried that I had ruined the moment, and Buffy would hate me because of it.
"It was...better than I imagined," Buffy replied, slowly bringing her eyes to meet mine.
"I-Imagined? How...how long?" I asked, as Buffy flinched a little but I smiled at her, trying to ease her.
"Since the first day we met. You're beautiful Willow. No matter what Cordelia and her club of bitches think. If Xander didn't see the hotness of you, that's his loss," Buffy said, as I blushed to match the color of my hair.
"You think I'm beautiful?" I asked, not wanting to believe it. I was waiting for her to say 'just kidding,' or laugh at me and kick me out of her room, or call me a freak and say how she couldn't wait to tell Cordelia.
"I love you, Willow," Buffy said and I froze. 'Say something doofus' I snapped at myself. Buffy was great. She made me feel safe, important, and she loves me! Buffy began to turn her head away, clearly thinking she went over the line. I couldn't let her think that. Not with my feelings for her.
"I love you too, Buffy. Okay, I was lusting after Xander but that was more because he was my friend. Oh, not saying that I'm only saying this because you're my friend because you're more to me than my friend, which is obvious because I love you too-" I babbled, blushing as Buffy laughed.
"Breathe, Will," she commented as I nodded my head, stopping and breathing to get myself under control.
"It's just that you make me feel safe, Buffy. You make me happy whenever I'm feeling down. You make me feel like I'm important, and that somebody really thinks highly of me. I can't stand being away from you, and being with you makes my life...perfect," I remarked, internally frowning, and hoping she didn't find that really lame.
"How could anybody not fall head over heels for you, Will? I met you, and within an instant, I was totally in love. Your smile, your babbling...okay, your taste in clothes isn't the best," she teased, as I looked at her in surprise, and glared. I picked up a pillow.
"That's it, missy," I replied, throwing my pillow at her. She dodged it, and laughed, throwing her own pillow at me. Soon, we were engaged in a full on pillow fight. I finally fell back on her bed, exhausted. Buffy smiled, and stretched out next to me. I smiled, lost in her eyes and her gorgeous smile. She leaned down, kissing me on the forehead but I pulled her lips down to mine. We broke to catch our breaths again when I frowned. She looked at me with a bit of confusion. "You never met with Giles?" I asked, as Buffy closed her eyes, and leaned back, head resting on her pillow. I snuggled against her, as she wrapped her arm around me but I could feel her body tensing.
"I met. Turns out there are prophecies. One of them happens to involve The Master and yours truly. I fight The Master tomorrow night, and he'll kill me," she remarked with a sigh, as I instantly shot out of bed so quickly that Buffy whimpered at the loss of contact.
"What?" I screeched as Buffy gasped, pantomiming me to quiet down but I was having none of it. No way was my girlfriend, 'heh, I like that, girlfriend' I quickly thought, going to die at the hands of this Master. He's supposed to be tough but damnit...I just found her. "I just found you, Buffy! I'm not going to lose you this soon," I shouted, as the door opened, and Joyce stood there with fear and concern.
"Are you girls alright?" she asked, as Buffy sat up and I turned to look at her. Joyce flinched, as I was still pissed off.
"We're fi-" Buffy began but I cut her off in my anger.
"No, we're pretty far from fine. Buffy, I won't let you die tomorrow!" I stated as Buffy paled.
"Buffy's going to die tomorrow?" Joyce asked in confusion, as I turned to look at her like she should've known what was going on. Then it dawned on me, and I turned back to Buffy in surprise and concern.
"She doesn't know?" I asked in surprise, as Buffy winced, shook her head, and stared at the carpet. My eyes widened, as I realized what I had just done, and I bowed my head, blushing. 'Oh boy Willow...way to get Buffy in trouble' I thought as I stared intently at the carpet. Joyce just glared at Buffy, and turned her attention to me.
"Willow, could you wait downstairs for a while please?" Joyce asked, but I knew it was a command, directed right at me, Willow Rosenberg. I cast a quick glance at Buffy and quietly walked past Joyce and down the stairs. I sat in the living room, waiting for the shouting and breaking of objects that I felt was imminent.