Impressionable Sorrows
by DawnBTVS
Part VI: Hospital Visits and Appointments
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I'm not aware I'm pacing the hospital, or maybe I am, and just don't know it. Last time I was here, I was stuck in a coma at the hands of Buffy. Not fond memories, no doubt about that. Tara's birthday party was pretty fun. I got her a crystal ball...just my luck that Giles had brought the same present. Unfortunately the event was cut a little short when Joyce had to be taken to the hospital. Buffy and Willow were seated next to each other, Willow resting her head on Buffy's shoulder. Dawn was resting her head on Buffy's other shoulder. Giles, Xander, and Anya were seated next to Willow. I continued pacing, feeling Tara's eyes burning into me. I can tell Buffy's watching me as well. I stop, finally, and slump next to Tara.
"Ahem," cleared a throat. I glanced up as Buffy shot to her feet. Willow opened her eyes, annoyed at first, but soon on her feet, holding both hands on Buffy's shoulders. We were all standing by then as the doctor stood there with a chart in hand.
"What is it? Will she be okay?" Buffy asks, the fear clear. The doctor gives a grim smile.
"Your mother has a low grade glioma. It's a brain tumor. It seems to have started in the left hemisphere of the brain, so it didn't seem to spread from another part of the body. We do believe that it is operable however. We'd like to keep her here for the next few days," the doctor says. I'm numb, can't feel a thing. I can't imagine what Buffy and Dawn are feeling. Buffy just nods her head as the doctor walks away.
"That's good, right?" asks Dawn, sounding scared, and smaller than age fifteen. Buffy looks down, nods her head, but stays silent. Dawn grabs Buffy's hand and holds it tightly.
~~~BTVS~~~
I arrived at the Magic Box a little late, just in time to see Buffy leaving. I decided to take out my frustrations on a horde of vampires. It helped a little bit, but I was still feeling pissed off.
"Where you going, B?" I ask, curious. Buffy turns and looks at me.
"I'm going to find Glory. I'm going to kick her ass," she says, determined, and resolve face firmly in place. I grin. "I need you to stay here, Faith. Dawn should be here shortly. I need you to protect her while I'm fighting Glory. You're the only one strong enough. I've trusted you so far, although Willow's taken a little longer to come around. I managed to talk Giles and Xander into trusting you, but don't expect hugs and presents. I've taken Angel's word that you've been good, and so far you have. Don't make me regret it," she says. I flinch when she says the word regret. She's always been there to try and help me, and I've only filled her with regret for ever trying. I start to protest, wanting to help her, and prove my worth but she cuts me off with a stern look. I sigh, and nod my head in acceptance. I watch her leave, silently wishing that I could be right there battling with her. My job is here though, and I'll do it.
"Hey, Faith," I hear Dawn call. I turn around, smiling. Dawn smiles.
"How'd school go?" I ask, as we enter the Magic Box. Dawn shrugs her shoulders, hoisting the backpack to the floor, as she takes a seat at the table. I give a little smirk.
"The usual, you know," she replies.
"I never finished high school, Dawn, so I might be out of the loop," I say, guilt filling me. Way to inspire the younger Summers right there. She looks at me and makes a little 'O' with her mouth. I sigh.
"I'm sorry," Dawn says, and sighs, seemingly feeling like she made me guilty. It's true, but I can't let her feel that. I smile at her.
"Cheer up. Just because I didn't graduate high school, doesn't mean you can follow my lead," I say, smirking the whole time. Dawn glares at me. She turns back to her homework. I stand up, just walking around.
"Buffy?" asks Xander, as I turn towards the door. Buffy staggers in, badly beaten. Willow and I instantly rush to her aid, helping her to a chair. Willow grabs the cloth from Giles and is already attending to her love's cuts and bruises. I can see a nice laceration on her forehead. It'll likely need stitches. That was quick too, not a good sign.
"We have to get you to the hospital, B," I say. She shakes her head, wincing in pain, letting out a sharp gasp as Willow dabs against a cut.
"Baby, we're going to the hospital. Don't argue," says Willow, putting on her infamous resolve face. I wonder if anybody's been able to knock that down. Xander told me once, that Willow could've stopped both World Wars with that look. I have to say, I'm starting to believe him. Buffy gets up, with help from Willow. They'd kill to save each other. People say romance is dead? They haven't seen Buffy and Willow then.
~~~BTVS~~~
I wait, just standing there. The gang's all there, but nobody is saying much. Dawn and Buffy are visiting Joyce. Buffy refused treatment, of course. It took Willow coming with-in millimeters of breaking down to finally force Buffy to get taped up. Joyce was getting her surgery tomorrow. I think it's tomorrow. Maybe it's tonight, I'm not really sure as my mind is in a bit of a fog.
"Hey, Giles. How's Joyce?" I ask, curious about her condition. I'm not that close with the family, but I feel like I need to get involved, you know? Be a part of what's going on now. Now that Dawn's become somewhat of a surrogate sister to me.
"She seems to be doing well at the moment. She'll be moved into surgery anytime now," Giles answers. I see Buffy and Dawn walking down the hallway. I wonder if Dawn's figured it out yet. Willow rises out of her seat, instantly embracing Buffy. Buffy winces, but manages to keep her mouth closed. I smile. Love like that, it's real, and it's not something that you can fabricate. I've tried, although attempting that level of love on a one-night stand is hard to accomplish. Dawn walks up to me, and sits next to me. I gaze down at her. Her face is full of fear, worry, and anxiety. Those expressions shouldn't be on the face of a teenager, especially Dawn. Then again, they were on my face since age ten so I've had some experience.
"She'll be fine, Dawn. Don't worry about it," I say, reassuring her and myself. I like Joyce, even with the bullshit I put her through, she's a good woman, and she doesn't deserve this shit. I find it hard to believe in God when stuff like this occurs. He seems to enjoy taking people from me, although I've helped him quite a few times in that regard.
"I'm gonna use the bathroom," she whispers, standing up slowly. I nod my head, watching her escape from the real world, if only for a few minutes. I glance over at Buffy and Willow. Buffy has her head nuzzled against Willow's shoulder. I'm pretty sure Buffy's crying, now that Dawn's out of sight. She had to be the big sister, all strong for Dawn. It's unfair for Buffy, and it's unfair for Dawn that they have to go through this. My mother was a fucking bitch, and she is still alive. I lost contact with her about six years ago, and I don't care what she's up to. I figure she's probably dead. I wonder if, deep down, I wish that were the case? Joyce can't die. She's too fucking good. If anybody should be dead, it should be me. I glance around, realizing that Dawn hasn't returned yet. I look up at the clock, noticing it's been a lengthy time. No reasonable girl can spend their time, that long. Not even a grieving girl, bawling her eyes out. Fuck me. I'm not sure if I should do anything. She isn't my sister after all. I have to help though. I can't go through what happened before, not again.
"Joy," I whisper to myself. I stand up and discreetly I walk away. I check back to make sure nobody's following me. I'm lucky, as I'm in the clear. I curse, angry that the fear is so palpable here in the hospital. I stop, and pause, listening. I can hear Dawn, ever so quiet, talking. I inch forward, ignoring the orderlies, doctors, and nurses. I pause outside a door, pressing my ear tightly to it.
"Do you know where my Key is, Dawn?" asks a female. Must be the bitch that roughed Buffy up. I wonder if charging there in the John Wayne style would get me killed or just beaten down.
"Well, maybe if you described it, I could tell you where it is," Dawn answers. I curse myself again, wondering how I always get dragged into this being a heroine shit. I sigh, clenching my fists at my sides. Time for action, the especially violent kind where I could wind up dead, and Dawn so owes me.
"Who are you?" coos the bitch. Dawn instinctively races behind me and out the door. Just then, Buffy and the rest of the gang show up. Good to have cavalry, before I got my ass handed to me.
"Glory," mutters Buffy. I glance at her. They are on a first name basis, must count for something right? I fly at Glory, no longer caring to discuss semantics with myself. My right hand gets blocked and I go flying right into a wall. Damn, that really hurts. Buffy charges, delivering a nice roundhouse kick and I'm on my feet again. I leap, connecting with a sidekick that knocks Glory to the floor.
"Discede," shouts Willow, tossing dust onto Glory. I stare at Willow like she's nuts, because, well, we're fighting a really tough bitch. I highly doubt sprinkled dust is gonna effect shit.
"Where'd she go?" I ask, unaware that Willow's fallen to the floor with a major league nosebleed. All I know is that Glory is no longer in the room.
"Teleportation spell. There's still kinks and where they end up, is one of them," she mumbles, eyes looking a little glazed over. Dawn darts back into the room as Buffy and her embrace. I'm starting to hate the hospital with a passion. Maybe it's the feeling that I live here now with the injuries and the trauma. Buffy dashes to tend to Willow, as Tara is looking me over, but I shrug her away. It's only a minor cut, something that can be fixed back at Summer central.