Blind Sided
by alicorn
Coffee
[reviews]
Part 2
Willow sat on the toilet floor reminding herself it wasn't a dream. They had kissed. No, they had devoured each other. On the dance floor of the Scarlet Cloak. Buffy had kissed her!!?? not a peck, but, a real kiss. Okay so she had deepened the kiss, but Buffy had followed.
What the hell did it mean? Would they kiss again? Was this a once off curiosity solver? Why hadn't she stopped it sooner?
Buffy was in their dorm room now, making coffee. Behaving as she always did when they got back from a night out. 'I bet she's not racking her brains over what this means.'
'This is ridiculous, we were both lonely, both a little drunk, it was nothing more. Bad Beer, very Bad Beer.' She told herself and having set her head as level as it was going to get, she headed back to their room.
Buffy was just picking up the two cups. "There you go." And she handed one to Willow. "So, wanna watch a movie? I'm wide awake."
Willow flicked through the channels and picking an old chic flick, she returned to her cushion and coffee on the floor next to Buffy. Both leaning against her bed, as they always did, they settled in for a film fest.
"I'm getting to old for this 5am thing." Complained Buffy, as her knee clicked loudly and she glared at it accusingly.
"Pretend it didn't happen, denial is a wonderful thing." Grinned Willow.
"Is that what we're doing, Will?" She said changing tack.
"I guess so." Willow replied unable to keep a hint of her sadness, from invading her words. 'a few cryptic sentences, and its over.'
"Why. Will?"
"Because its easier than having to deal with it." Willow replied, realising this was not going to be a five line disappearance. She had some how been volunteered to do the leg work. "Easier than dissecting each others motives. You don't want to tell me it meant nothing and I don't need my ego to hear it." Her words sounded harsher than she had intended.
"I haven't said that. And I wasn't intending to." Buffy stated, turning to Willow as she spoke. "How can you assume it meant nothing to me. I care about you."
"As a friend, yes. But friends don't kiss like that, Buffy. At least not any friends I know. Kinda makes it hard to remain just friends." She ended.
"Why?"
"Cos, the relationship changes, when the kissing starts."
"I don't want to loose you as a friend, Will."
"Exactly, so we pretend it never happened." Willow replied, feeling that as the circle was closing, she was loosing her patience. She wanted this part over. She wanted to be able to relax with her friend and end a night out as they had a thousand times before.
"But I enjoyed kissing you and I may want to do that again." Persisted Buffy.
Willow's eyebrows almost flew off her face with shock as she half heard the words. "You what?"
"Didn't you like me kissing you?"
"Well yes, but it was something of a surprise, Buffy." Willow scrutinised Buffy's face, trying to read her mind and guess where this was going. "Not that I don't like surprises. Well actually I do." She quickly added as she saw the beginning of worry appear on her face. "Hey Buffy, you know I enjoyed that kiss. You curled my toes. But, I don't want to blow it up. Make it seem more than it was. If your honest, your not well....... sexually, let alone ........ romantically interested in me. Your might have been curious.....so that has been sated and..... I was always a safe bet." Too late she saw the anger in Buffy's face.
"I was not thinking that way, Willow. What a horrible thing to say. That you could think that I use you like that. What kind of woman do you think I am?" She seethed and then added to herself, "It went so much smoother when I planned this."
"Planned this?" Willow's eyebrow's knitted in confusion. "What Plan?"
"My plan to seduce you." She said looking Willow straight in the eye. "I just assumed you still found me attractive, minus the Beer. Not the case I guess."
"Your what? Okay now I know you had too many Beer's tonight. You are the most attractive woman I have known in my entire life. Your crazy...that's becoming apparent, but I wouldn't change a thing." Frustration and soft laughter filled her voice and somehow the release of the kiss, allowed her eyes to show that she meant every word. "But you've changed track on me, Buffy. Its no wonder, I don't have a clue where your coming from. How am I meant to react to what happened tonight? I'm sceptical of your motives, that's a given, but what did you expect, Buffy. I'm working in the dark here... so fill me in. What's going on here?" She let her fear and confusion become visible. "Is this curiosity, loneliness, ..." She never got to finish.
"You don't know? I can see it hasn't even occurred to you that I might want to seduce you, because its been running between us like electricity for months. I find you attractive, I want to be more than just friends." Buffy's eyes looked sadly hopeful. "I want to make love, I want to make love to you, I want you to make love to me. It's time Willow, well beyond time. We have danced around this for far too long". She raised her hand to Willow's cheek. "You know we have."
Silently Willow stared at her friend. A thousand thoughts fighting for a place at the front of her head. "But..." Not one thought made it to her mouth.
"Ahh, there's always a, But."
Collecting herself Willow regrouped her thoughts and proceeded. "But, I told you I found you attractive....remember Bad Beer? Why now? Then, you practically patted my head, like a small sweet child. Now you try to seduce me? Decide we should stop being just friends and make love. Why now? .....Buffy have you picked up any amulet's or made a badly worded wish to someone strange today? Hold on, are you the real Buffy, or another dimensions Buffy? Or maybe....." She stared at the carpet between them as she babbled her way to silence.
After a brief moment Buffy replied. "Back then, you know Bad Beer time, I was fighting it, you know, or you must have had some idea that I felt a connection between us, but you scared me. Okay? By the time I got past the fear, you were in a relationship or I was. When you first got the feelings, didn't you try to fight them?" She asked. "I hated it when you found Tara, but put it down to being possessive of my friend and jealous of the times she took you from me. I went out with Riley and Parker, to try and be normal. You know what I mean. But, now we are both single and have been for a while now. I have had time to grow up, if you like and sort out what I want from life. And what I want is you." She said placing her hand on Willow's folded leg.
"But your straight, you like men, they turn you on, not women. Okay you had that brief crush on Faith, that does not a Wicca make and you know it." Willow replied, going for her last logical argument, her last reason why this couldn't work.
"I may like men, that is to say I don't hate them. But, I'm in love with a woman and have been for far too long. You're my best friend, I'm sorry I don't have the Wicca cred, but I have never been in love before. If I'd known I was going to fall in love with a woman, I would have revised for the exam. But it wasn't on the list of options I was given." Slowly she brushed away Willow's hair and raised her face. "I didn't mean for this to be such a shock, Will. But your so good at keeping that friendly distance."
"It seemed safer to, after the Beer episode." Willow gazed at her friend. "This seems so unreal."
"Willow, for god sake say something or kiss me, let me know I'm not the only one who needs more." Buffy pleaded. And Willow's heart exploded.
She gave into years of wishing in that moment. Lowering her head, anticipation filling her, she raised it again, this time closer, quenching her hunger as their lips met. The sweet soft eagerness of Buffy's mouth met her. She found herself in Buffy's arms. 'Too sweet' she thought or did she whisper?
For, "Yes, you are." Came as the reply.