Always Time to Say Goodbye
by hexx
chapter 3
[reviews]
Chapter three
"Buffy . . .I . . ." Willow felt overwhelmed and confused by what she
was being asked. What was Buffy REALLY asking of her? Going back to do it
again? Do what again? The years since Sunnydale had been good to her,
did she really want to give that up for , for what, a chance that it
could turn out worse? And what about Kennedy? Was she willing to give up
the years they had been together, for Buffy?
She knew the answer even as it entered her mind, a realization that
forced her breath to catch in her throat. No matter what had happened
between them, she knew that whatever Buffy had needed from her she would
give it. Hell, she had just lied to her wife and gone off with Angel to
restore Buffy's soul into her vampiric body.
And now she was offered the chance to do it all again, to spend those
years at the slayer's side, again. She realized with no small amount of
guilt that she hadn't really needed to think about this at all, she'd
made the decision the moment it was offered. Now all she had to do was
confirm the growing hope inside her heart, and discover what it was that
Buffy was hiding in hers.
Angel picked that moment to return from whatever it was that Buffy had
asked him to do. He knelt down by her and placed his hand on her
forehead feeling the heat under the undead skin. " You're burning up, you
know that's not a good thing, right?"
Buffy only gave him a weak smile and gave his hand a gentle squeeze. "
I'll be OK, is everything set up?"
"Yeah, I placed everything you'll need in the room out back,
everything's ready to go." He paused, he wasn't entirely convinced this was wise.
He also had an idea of what was really driving the slayer to do it and
it hurt him to know what he was going to lose. "Are you sure that this
is what you want?''
"Kinda too late for second thoughts isn't it? But, yeah, it is. I know
this is going to be hard for you, . . . I just want you to know how
much it means to me that you're willing to do this for me."
Angel leant down to whisper into her ear. "There has always been a bond
between us, I believe there always will be. I'll always be there when
you need me."
Angel looked over to where her Willow was sitting and back to Buffy,
"She looks like she's made her decision."
Buffy couldn't look at her, she knew all to well what she was asking
her friend to do, and she recognized the very real possibility that she
would turn her down. "How's she look?"
"She's got a pissed off version of her 'resolve face' on, it doesn't
look good. Maybe you better prepare yourself for the worst."
Willow watched the interaction between the two vampires not really
understanding what they were discussing, and not really paying that much
attention to it either, she was still reeling from what she decided to
do.
That didn't make it any easier though, and the fact that Buffy was
asking her do this now, after all these years. . . all the terrible things
that had happened to them back then, and she wanted to live through all
that again on the CHANCE that it might be better this time? Willow
needed to be sure, not just of what was in her heart but what the slayer
really wanted.
"Buffy !" Willow said her name somewhat forcefully to make sure that
she had her attention and it startled the slayer somewhat. She looked at
the witch somewhat sheepishly and Angel backed off a few feet, this was
between the ladies and he had no intention of getting between them.
"Buffy, I know you said you can't tell me much more, but before I tell
you what I've decided you need to answer a few questions, and answer
them honestly, and the PTB be damned. OK?"
The petite blonde nodded and looked down at her feet, no this didn't
look good at all.
"OK, you don't have to say much, just yes or no . First, you're in
pain, aren't you?"
"Yes."
"The slayer in you is trying to destroy the demonic body it's now in,
correct?"
"yes."
"And the spell to restore your soul, it won't stop that will it?"
"no."
"How long till it kills you, and don't you dare lie to me."
". . . sunrise." Buffy didn't like the way this was going, Willow
sounded really pissed. She brought her arms up across her belly, hugging
herself, hoping she was wrong.
Willow took a step closer and lifted the new vampire's chin with two
gentle fingers so that she could look into her eyes.
"Look at me Buffy . . .Tell me the truth, you're not doing this because
of Adam, or Glory, or the First, or any other of the big bads we had to
face are you?"
" I . . . I don't know what you mean."
"DON'T ! . . . Please Buffy, the truth, I've already made up my mind,
but I need to hear this from you . " Willow's 'resolve' face melted into
one of concern and need, Buffy knew that it would be impossible to lie
to her at this point.
" No, those aren't the reasons."
" Then tell me ...why?"
"Willow I . . .I can't . . ."
The witch knelt at the slayer's feet holding both her hands, deep green
eyes piercing hazel, tears born from a desperate need wetting her
lashes. "Buffy, please, tell me . . .say it, please!"
"Willow I. . .I've always . . .Because I love you."
"How long?"
"Always, since that very first day in the quad."
"But you never said anything."
"I did, in my own way, but I never had the courage to just tell you. I
never thought for one moment that it could be like that between us.
Then, when you came out I thought , just for a moment that there was a
chance, but you had Tara and there was always the next big bad, and the
chance that my next fight would be my last. I didn't want you to have to
go through that, I couldn't bare it. Then I wasn't the only slayer
anymore, I didn't have to take the risks anymore, but you had Kennedy by
then and I couldn't do anything to ruin that for you, or our friendship.
But it got to be too much for me to be around you knowing what I could
never have, so our friendship suffered anyway."
"Do you have any idea what you're asking me to do, what you are asking
me to give up? I've been with Kenny for over twenty years, good years."
With a sense of dread the small woman could only nod. She knew exactly
what she was asking and what the risks were, and was willing to face
the reality that the wiccan would say no, which at this point seemed an
all too likely possibility.
"When do we leave?"
"Huh? What?"
"I said, when do we leave?"
Buffy looked deep into her green eyes and could see the determination
and resolve burning behind them. She could also see the deep and undying
love the redhead had always held close to her heart for the slayer.
Leaning forward she pressed her lips to Willows, tears leaking from her
eyes from the sheer joy of kissing her one true love at long last.
T.B.C. (soon) please review