FIC: Reasons & Advice

["Pat Kelly" <bandits@xxxxxxxxx>]

Title: "Reasons & Advice"
Author: Angela and Pat Kelly
E-Mail: glasswrks@xxxxxxxxx, bandits@xxxxxxxxx
Copyright: Nov. 21, 1999
Disclaimer: Joss owns the characters from "Buffy:The
Vampire Slayer" all others belong to Angela.
Rating: PG-13.
Authors Note: Angela and I combined our efforts. We wrote two fics separately, "Reasons" and "Getting Advice", but they were meant to be together as one fic, and this is the result.

REASONS AND ADVICE

Willow sat alone in the dorm room she shared with Buffy Summers, the person she realized she was in love with. Playing in the background was a Linda Ronstadt CD. She wondered when Buffy would return from patrolling.

She had wanted to go with her, but Buffy put a stop to it.
"I know you've gone with me before... but... I don't think it's a good idea."

"Why not?" she asked, crushed.

"You... you're sort of distracting, Will... not.not that I don't love have you there with me..."

"Oh... I'm sorry Buffy."

"Will... no, stop, please. It's not you... honest. I... I need to think about something, and well, you...vampires... thinking... don't mix. I'm sorry," Buffy replied, hating to see the disappointment on her friend's face.

"Okay... I understand," she replied.

"Tomorrow, Will. I promise," Buffy told her, giving her a quick hug. "You're the best... bye."

With that, she was out the door. Willow glanced at her alarm clock...That had been three hours ago.

(I love you... for sentimental reasons I hope you do believe me...I'll give you my heart)

Willow had been listening to the same song for the last hour. It struck a cord in her, and she felt compelled to listen to it over and over again. She needed to talk to someone, and she knew who would help her. Picking up the phone, she dialed a number, hoping she remembered it correctly.

"Hello?" The voice asked.

"Angel.hey."

"Willow?"

"Yeah. Sorry if I'm bugging you.but.I need your advice on something."

They talked for about twenty minutes, then hung up. Maybe there was hope for them. Soon, she felt her eyes grow heavy, and felt her mind wander...


(I love you and you alone were meant for me)


***


"Die, Slayer!" The vampire yelled at Buffy.

The newly risen were always the over-confident ones. "'Die Slayer?' That was the best you could come up with? Don't any of you have any wit at all?"

The vampire sweep kicked her, but she jumped to avoid it. Turning quickly, she kicked him in the back before he had a chance to regain his balance, and he fell. She rolled him over with her foot, so his chest was facing upwards.

"I don't know if I even wanna waste a pun on you. I don't think you deserve it."

She grabbed a stake from her sleeve, and jammed it into his heart. He turned to ash. Sitting on the ground, she wondered why she was still out here. She could've gone back to the dorm a half an hour ago.

Slaying was supposed to help clear her head. It didn't. Not this time. She had a problem. A rather large one and she couldn't think straight. Normally, she would go to Willow to talk about stuff, but not this time. For good reasons too.

No, there was only one other person who was able to help her, and she didn't know if she wanted to go there. Tilting her head, she listened as she heard faint footsteps behind her.

Jumping up, she came face to face with Spike.

"What're you doing out here?" She asked.

"Watching you work, and feeling sorry for the lunkhead I'm standing on."

Buffy sat back down on the ground. "I guess watching is all you can do now, huh?"

All Spike could do was grimace. "You have to rub it in."

"Of course I do. It's not every day that the killer of two slayers.what's the word? Can't.perform?"

"Once I find out what the hell they did to me," He looked at her accusingly, "I'll be back in the game. So sod off about it."

"Hey, I had nothing to do with that. It's not my fault you get your ass kicked. Well, actually, I guess it is." She smirked, and looked over at him. He was really taking it hard. "Sorry. So what exactly are you doing out here?"

"Trying to escape Harmony. Worst choice I ever made." He shuddered. "And what are you doing sitting in the middle of a graveyard?"

"Thinking." Then she got an idea. "Drive me to Angel's."

"I thought that was a no-no."

"I need to talk to him."

"Why?"

"None of your business."

"Would it involve a bed?"

She punched him. "No. Why? Are you afraid Angelus will show up and tease you?" Spike really wanted to hit her, and she could see that. "Look, it'll get you away from Harmony. Plus, I don't want the guys to know."

"Fine. But I'm not a bloody chauffeur."

"Of course not." Buffy grinned.

***


Standing outside the door to Angel Investigations, she wondered if she had made the right choice in coming here. Well, it was too late now. Spike said he needed to get back before Harmony went looking for him, so she let him go. She would have to find another way home.

There was still a lot of night left, so Angel could have been out. She turned the knob. It was locked. Someone behind her cleared his throat, and she turned around.

"Can I help you?" The man asked with a thick Irish accent.

"Yeah. Is Angel here?"

"Depends on who you are."

"Buffy. He knows me."

The man relaxed and then recognition flashed in his eyes. "Angel wasn't kidding."

"Excuse me?"

"Oh, sorry. Doyle." He held out his hand, which she shook. "He's downstairs."

They went inside, and Buffy looked around, noticing the setup. Reception desk, computer, plants. It was nice.

"How's he doing?"

"As good as a brooding, souled, vampire can be doing." He joked.

"You don't seem like the brooding type."

"Me? Far from it. I keep trying to get him to look at the wild side of life, but he's."

"Stubborn?"

"That's the word. All the man needs is to go to a bar, get drunk, and then wake up the next morning in bed with." Doyle looked at Buffy's expression. It said, 'stop now'. ".a really bad hangover."

They got to the elevator that led down to Angel's home, and Doyle opened the gate.

"I'll let you go down."

"Thanks."

Buffy shut the gate, and pushed the down button.

***


Angel was sitting on his couch, reading a book, when he looked up and saw Buffy step out of the elevator. He stood, and they met each other halfway.

"Hi." He said.

"Hey. Place looks good."

"Thanks."

"I met Doyle up there. He's definitely the Oscar to your Felix." Angel gave her a quizzical expression. "TV reference."

"I still have to get one of those. So.how'd you get here?"

"Spike. Don't ask."

They were silent for awhile.

"What do you need?"

"I need to talk to you about something. Actually, I need your advice." He nodded, and they went and sat on the couch. "I would've just called, but Willow's in the dorm."

"Okay." He said, still puzzled.

"I kind of.like someone."

"You don't have to come ask my permission to ask someone out, Buffy."

"I'm not. I just don't know what to do. I've had some bad.experiences lately, and I don't wanna mess up again."

"I heard."

"How?"

"Spike." Buffy cast her eyes downward. "You made a mistake. It's okay."

"You're not mad?"

"Buffy, I left.so you could move on. I'm glad you're trying. Just tell me you hit him. Hard."

"Eventually. Twice, actually." She smiled.

"So, what's going on?"

"Willow's been real upset lately, cause Oz."

"I know. He came by."

"He did?"

"He wanted to know a good place to hide out for awhile. I don't know where he decided to go."

"Oh. Well, something just kind of hit me afterwards." Angel gave her a 'go ahead' look. "I think.I think I love Willow." He was quiet. "Reaction please."

"I always knew you did. And deep down, I think you did too."

"I guess I did."

"Do whatever makes you happy. That's all that matters. All you have to do is tell her."

"I did.but she was numb. I don't think it registered. I didn't even know I said it at first. It just slipped out."

"I'm still not clear on the problem."

"Duh! Angel, if I tell her, and she doesn't feel the same way, our friendship is done for."

"But if you don't, you'll never know how she feels. Sometimes a risk is worth taking."

"What if the risk falls through? I don't want to lose her."

"You won't."

"Have you ever put any of that wisdom to use on yourself?"

"What do you mean?"

"You probably sit here reading this same book every night. How many times?"

"I think its somewhere near a thousand now."

"Angel, you have to get out. Do things. We were both supposed to move on, and you don't look like you are. It's making me feel guilty."

"I never want you to feel guilty. But I'm a vampire."

"Really? I hadn't noticed." She said sarcastically.

"A relationship with anyone."

"Who said relationship? You can go out and not look for a relationship. I haven't forgotten the clause."

"Me neither."

"But there's always loopholes in clauses. You're doing good things, Angel. Eventually, someone's going to notice, and put you in control permanently. I know it.

"But if you don't make an effort to be around people."

"I know."

"Tell you what. I'll tell Willow that I love her, if you promise to go have fun with Doyle somewhere. Several times. Not just once. Deal?"

"Deal."

"Good. And thanks."

"You're welcome. Do you need to get back?"

"Yeah, nobody knows I'm here. Well, except for Spike. Gotta go see a redhead."

She stood, and he walked her to a door.

"You can go this way. You sure you don't want a ride?"

"No, that's okay."

"Good luck."

"You too."

She smiled at him as he held the door open, and walked out.

***


Shutting the door, Angel felt better. Buffy was right. He made his way over to the couch, and closed the book. He slipped his jacket on, and was about to go upstairs to get Doyle, when his phone started to ring.

He picked it up. "Hello?"

"Angel.hey."

"Willow?"

"Yeah. Sorry if I'm bugging you.but.I need your advice on something."

Angel couldn't help but grin. Buffy was going to be extremely surprised and happy when she got back. They both were.

***

Willow opened her eyes and blinked a few times. She stood still...

"Ah... Miss, would you like your usual table?"
"Excuse me?" she replied, turning to face the man who had asked her the question.
"Your table, we have it reserved for you."
"Oh... sure," Willow replied.
"This way please."

Willow followed him towards the front of the room, where a band was playing and there were couples on the dance floor. The gentleman held Willow's chair out for her, she took her seat, and it was then that she noticed...

"Oh... My... Gosh... I'm in black and white!"

As a matter-of-fact, everything was.

"I'm sorry, did you say something?"

"No... No, not at all."

"I'll bring your usual," he said as he departed.

"Thanks," Willow replied, as she glanced around the room. {I must be dreaming} she thought to herself.

All the women were elegantly dressed and the men wore tuxedos.

"Ladies and gentlemen, Le Maison De O'Leon proudly presents the song stylings of Miss Madeline Summers," the orchestra leader said. Applause followed.

"Here you are."

"Thank you," Willow replied, as a bucket containing a magnum of champagne was set next to the table.

{Buffy?} Willow thought as the curtains parted and Madeline Summers walked up to the microphone.

The spotlight shined brightly on the dress 'Madeline' was wearing. The plunging neckline accenting her breasts and the straps that held up the dress; which seemed painted on, were thin.

"Good evening ladies and gentlemen. I hope you don't mind if I start off the set by singing a song which has become a favorite of mine," Madeline said, glancing back to the orchestra leader.

She gently caressed the microphone, then began to sing.

(I love you... for sentimental reasons. I hope you do believe me...I'll give you my heart)

"The song," Willow whispered.

(I love you and you alone were meant for me. Please give your loving heart to me and say we'll never part)


Willow watched as 'Madeline' looked around the room as she sang.


(I think of you every morning dream of you every night. Darling, I'm never lonely
whenever you're in sight. I love you... for sentimental reasons. I hope you do believe me...I've given you my heart)


Then as the instrumental section of the song began, Willow stared as Buffy's doppelganger locked eyes with her. She was surprised to see that when 'Madeline'
took up the song once more, she continued to glance in her direction.


(I think of you every morning dream of you every night. Darling, I'm never lonely
whenever you're in sight. I love you... for sentimental reasons I hope you do believe me...I've given you my heart)


As the song ended, 'Madeline' received thunderous applause. Willow sat enthralled as 'Madeline' continued for another twenty minutes, after which, she took her break and headed towards her dressing room.

"Miss... If you'll follow me, I'll escort you to Miss Summers dressing room," the headwaiter said, who had arrived as soon as the performance was completed.

Willow walked behind him, moving through the dance floor as couples soon filled the space once more. Soon, they both stood in front of the dressing room door.


KNOCK.... KNOCK.... KNOCK.


"Yes?"

"Miss Summers... I've brought Miss Rose... " The door opened quickly.

"That's fine Gerrard, thank you. Well, are you going to just stand there?"

"What?"

"Come in here silly," Madeline said, pulling a startled Willow into the room, and locking the door.

As soon as Madeline turned around, she closed the distance between them and wrapped her arms around the other woman.

"I wasn't sure you were going to make it," Madeline said, taking a step back and looking into the eyes that held her captive. "I've missed you," she said.

"You... I... um... you were wonderful," Willow stuttered. She couldn't believe this was happening.

"You're so cute when you do that, have I told you?" Willow shook her head. "My mistake... but enough talking for the moment," With that said, Madeline bent her head forward and captured Willow's lips in a kiss.

Willow's eyes could not have opened any wider had she wanted them to.

{Buffy's kissing me} she thought. {No...Wait... it's Madeline... I'm confused}

Before she knew what she was doing, Willow's eyes closed. Buffy's/Madeline's lips were soft and warm...

Soon, Willow gave into the gentle insistence of whoever was kissing her, asking for entrance into her mouth. Willow's hands moved on their own, slowly wrapping themselves around Buffy's doppelganger's back.

A knock at the door brought them both back to reality.

"Yes," Madeline gasped.

"Ten minutes Madeline."

"Thank you... I'll be right out," she replied, then turned her attention back to her companion. "Are you okay?" she asked.

"Oh... yeah... I'm... I'm great... Buf... Madeline."

"What... no pet names? Really Willomina."

"I'm sorry... Buffy?"

"You... are... forgiven Will," Madeline said punctuating each word with a kiss. "I've got to go, I'll see you later tonight?"

"Count on it," Willow replied.

"I love you, you know that?"

"I... I love you too Buffy," Willow replied truthfully.

They shared one last kiss, and then Madeline fixed her make-up and left the dressing room.

"Wow... Buffy loves me," she said out loud.

***

"Of course I do, Will."

Willow frowned. "Buffy?" she said looking around the room.

"Yeah, Will?"

"Where are you?" she didn't see Buffy anywhere in the room.

"Right here."

"Where... I don't see you?"


***



Buffy had come back to the dorm and had found Willow fast asleep. She was about to turn the CD Player off, when she listened to the lyrics of the song. It seemed as if Willow had particularly liked the track that was playing, because she had heard it four times since returning to her room.

She had changed into her PJ's, and was about to get into bed when she heard Willow's voice:

"Oh... yeah... I'm... I'm great... Buf... Madeline."

{Who's Madeline?} Buffy wondered.

"I'm sorry... Buffy?"

{What.is she dreaming?}



"Count on it."

{Count on what?}



"I... I love you too Buffy."

Buffy walked over to Willow's bed...Willow was squeezing her pillow...Actually, Willow was kissing her pillow.

Buffy shrugged and was in the midst of turning around, when Willow's voice broke the silence:

"Wow... Buffy loves me."

She wondered why Willow frowned when she replied that she loved her as well.


***


"Where... I don't see you?"

"I'm right here Will," Buffy said, as she sat next to her sleeping friend.


***

Willow was surprised to see Madeline come back into the dressing room.

"Aren't you going to be late?" Willow asked, completely forgetting the voice she'd heard seconds earlier.

"No... I needed something."

"What... what do you need?" Willow asked.


***


Buffy was curious as well; wishing she were able to listen in on the other part of the conversation and not just Willow's side.


***


"This," Madeline replied, taking Willow's arms and draping them around her shoulders.

***


Buffy was startled by Willow's sudden movement. What surprised her was the fact that it seemed as if Willow had no control over the action, as if someone else had moved her arms. She was only inches away from her friend's face.


***


"Oh... I think I like this," Willow whispered.

"I thought you might... now kiss me."

"Yes ma'am."


***


Buffy wasn't prepared for the kiss... she had no idea what Willow was "'Yes ma'am-ing'" to.


(Please give your loving heart to me and say we'll never part)


The kiss lasted a few seconds before Willow suddenly slumped back into bed.
"Will?" Buffy asked, getting off the bed, her lips tingling with the memory of the kiss.

"Hmm... Oh.. Hi Buffy. Is anything wrong? How did patrol go?"

"Hi... no... fine."

Smiling, Willow asked:

"Have you been back long?"

"Umm... no... fell asleep, did you?"

"Oh... yeah, sorry, I wanted to stay up," she yawned.

"No problem... in fact, I think I'll turn in," Buffy said.


(I think of you every morning dream of you every night. Darling, I'm never lonely whenever you're in sight)


"Okay... I hope I can get back to the dream I was having," Willow said, fixing her pillows.

"That good, huh?"

"Yeah... well, night Buff."

"Night, Will."


(I hope you do believe me...I've given you my heart)


{Oh boy... what do I do?} Buffy thought as she got into bed, her fingers brushing her lips.

The End.




"When I held that gun, I felt an incredible surge of power. Like God must feel when he's holding a gun.." (Homer J. Simpson)

"You've been fighting evil here for three years, and I've helped some, and now we're supposed to decide what we want to do with our lives. And I just realized that that's what I want to do. Fight evil, help people. I mean, I think it's worth doing. And I don't think you do it because you have to. It's a good fight, Buffy, and I want in."

"I kind of love you."
(Willow Rosenberg, Buffy Summers, BTVS)

"Don't.."
"What? Don't love you? I didn't know I got a choice in that."
(Angel, Buffy Summers, BTVS)