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Repost: Repost Side Effects
Disclaimer: All characters in this story belong to Joss Whedon and
others...not to me, unfortunately. This story was written merely for
pleasure, not for profit.
This is a Willow/Buffy story. If the thought of two women together upset
you, please don?t read this story.
Sequel alert: This is the sequel to Sappho?s spell.
Side Effects
by
Shyfox
Darkness. Darkness all around her. Pitch black all the eye could see.
The very air around her gave no clue as to where she was because there was
very little current moving around her. The only sound her ear could detect
was a faint murmuring sound. Kind of like a chorus of voices in a hushed
crowd or the trickle of a brook as it ran down stream. She strained her
hearing trying to detect where the sound was coming from, but it seemed to
be coming from everywhere
and nowhere all at once. Completely confused, she tried calling out, her
mouth opened but no sound emerged. ?Help me? she thought, before she
abruptly awoke, gasping out a breath of air as her green eyes took in the
early morning light of her dorm room.
?Will? Are you okay?? Willow heard Buffy?s husky voice in her ear as two
warm arms encircled her shaking form. Willow nodded jerkily, trying to calm
her rapidly beating heart. ?Same dream?? Buffy asked, being kind of an
expert on the recurring dream theme.
?Yeah.? Willow breathed, as she allowed herself to relax around the
comforting warmth of her lover. ?Except...? Willow stopped, not quite sure
how to put how she was feeling into
words.
?Tell me.? Buffy whispered, stroking the back of Willow?s neck with gentle
fingertips.
Willow took a deep breath and tried to form her jumbled up feelings into
coherent thought. ?It?s the same dark void, almost impenetrable by light. I
don?t know where I am, or how I got
there. There were a couple of differences in this dream though. When I
first started having the dream the air was so cold...freezing. I?ve never
been so cold in my life.? Willow remembered, shivering a little in Buffy?s
arms.
Buffy remembered waking up one morning not long after she and Willow had
first made love, to find her shivering uncontrollably. Willow?s teeth had
been chattering in her head, and she had her arms wrapped firmly around
herself as she tried to get herself warm. Buffy, alarmed at the state of
her lover, had taken her immediately into her arms, surprised to find her
body temperature perfectly normal. In fact it had been a little warmer than
usual. Buffy thinking Willow might have had a fever, forced Willow to sleep
in that morning not leaving her side until Willow insisted later that she
was perfectly fine. But when Buffy had woke up the next morning
and found Willow in the same condition, she forced Willow to tell her what
was wrong. Willow told Buffy between shuddering gasps, about her dream.
The dreams had been going on in this way for the past three weeks, and Buffy
was getting extremely worried. She continued to support her lover and hoped
that they?d find an answer to Willow?s strange dreams.
?But in tonight?s dream it was warm...so warm and comfortable. And...there
was this sound I couldn?t quite make out. It was like a murmur of a
thousand voices or a dozen bees droning. But in this really weird rhythm.?
Willow tried to describe the sound, but was frustrated when she realized she
just couldn?t do it. She knew she?d recognize the sound instantly if she
ever heard it again, but to describe it...she just didn?t have the words to
do it.
Willow shook her head in frustration, sighing deeply. Buffy pulled her
closer into her embrace, holding Willow tight against her chest and stroking
her hair gently. ?It?ll be okay.? Buffy whispered, kissing Willow on the
top of her head. ?I?ll go talk to Giles, see if he?s found out anything.
He wanted to talk to me about something he found out about that spell of
yours anyway.? Buffy was pleased to hear Willow snort gracefully into her
chest. Willow knew
exactly what spell she referred to. The one that had changed their
relationship for the better, though neither of them had told anyone about
the change in their relationship. Not even Giles. They wanted to get used
to the newness of the relationship first.
Willow looked reluctantly at the alarm beside Buffy?s bed, knowing that it
must be getting late and that she had an early morning class that morning.
She groaned at the confirmed
knowledge, as the red glowing numbers confirmed that it was seven thirty in
the morning. ?Ugh, I have to go to class.? Willow complained, clearly not
wanting to leave the warm spot that was
Buffy.
?I remember a time when you used to like going to class.? Buffy teased
gently, not wanting to leave the comfortable embrace she was in either, but
knowing that they had to get moving. Buffy was curious as to what Giles had
found out.
?I still do! I just don?t like leaving this bed.? Willow pouted, a look
that made Buffy weak in the knees every time.
?So...what fascinating subject is it this morning? Anthropology? History?
Biology?? Buffy teased.
?I?ll have you know it?s much more interesting than that.? Willow stated,
imperiously.
?Oh yeah? What is it?? Buffy smirked, enjoying their game.
?Human sexuality and reproduction.? Willow enjoyed how Buffy nearly choked
on that one. That is before Buffy got the upper hand on her.
?Didn?t we just do that?? Buffy asked, forcing Willow to raise a red
haired eyebrow at her. ?Well...except for the reproduction part.? Buffy
chuckled at Willow?s shocked expression.
?Well, I?d love to be able to lay here and do this all day, but I really do
have to get to class.? Willow sighed, starting to climb off of Buffy.
?No, I guess I wouldn?t want you to miss your class. But...? Buffy got a
wicked gleam in her eyes and Willow could swear she knew where Buffy was
going to go with this. ?Do you think they give extra credit for at home
participation?? Buffy asked, starting to nibble on the sweet skin of
Willow?s neck.
?Buffy!? Willow exclaimed in protest. ?Really Buffy...Buffy I can?t. I
don?t have time this morning.? Willow said, as she tried to squirm out of
her amorous lover?s embrace.
?Are you sure?? Buffy asked Willow, who had finally managed to stand up
next to Buffy?s bed.
?I?m sorry. Maybe later?? Willow answered the entreating look in Buffy?s
eyes. ?Please don?t give me the pout, you know I can?t withstand the pout.?
Willow pleaded internally as the
corners of Buffy?s mouth started to turn downwards. ?I really have to go.?
Willow practically ran to the closet as she grabbed an outfit to wear and
threw it on. ?Sorry.? Willow called over
her shoulder, as she threw open the dorm room door and quickly left. She
leaned up against the wooden frame, waiting for her heart beat to slow down
a bit before, smiling to herself, she headed off to class.
?Oh well,? Buffy said to herself. ?I guess I really shouldn?t keep Giles
waiting.? She sighed, then chuckled at the way Willow had practically
bolted from the room.
********
Willow was just about to leave the dormitory, when a sudden attack of
queasiness hit her. ?Oh no, not again.? She thought, dismayed, before
running into the nearest bathroom hoping to
make it to the closest stall before she lost the contents of her stomach all
over the bathroom floor. She quickly closed and locked the door of the stall
before leaning over and heaving into the toilet. This early morning ritual
was quickly becoming detested. Willow was sure it wasn?t something she ate,
and yet she didn?t think she was getting sick, after the initial bout of
queasiness it seemed
to fade for the rest of the day. She hadn?t told Buffy about this, not
wanting to make her worry anymore than she already was, and she vowed to
herself that if it didn?t go away in a couple of days she would go to see
her family physician and get it checked out. After rinsing her mouth and
washing her hands and face, Willow made her way out of the bathroom and
continued on her way to class.
********
?GILES?!? Buffy called out, slamming the door to Giles apartment as she
entered. Giles was just coming out of the kitchen, holding a steaming cup
of Earl Grey tea.
?Oh Buffy, you?re here. Excellent. Would you like a cup?? Giles offered,
knowing that Buffy probably wouldn?t take him up on it.
?Uh no, maybe later Giles.? Buffy said, as she flopped down on Giles couch
and looked at him expectantly. ?So...you wanted to tell me about the
spell?? Neither Buffy nor Willow wanted to take the chance of researching
the spell themselves. As far as Buffy could remember, all Willow had done
was read the spell before she was under it. So, Buffy had brought the spell
book to Giles, hoping that he would be able to safely say what the spell
was, where it had
originated from, and what the purpose behind the spell was, having informed
him as little as possible of what had happened that night. Luckily, when
Buffy had found the spell book it was already open to the pages Willow had
been reading, since Willow had no memory of what had happened that night at
all. So, it was really only a matter of Buffy asking Giles to determine
what the two spells on the pages were for. Giles had ruled out the first
spell right away, it being a
simple levitation spell that Willow could do in her sleep. The second spell
had captured his attention, and he had taken the book without hesitation,
muttering something about researching as
he walked away.
?Buffy, that was a very...uh...interesting spell you asked me to research.?
Giles started, noticing the look of anxiety that swept across Buffy?s face
before she hid it.
?Really? Did you find out anything?? Buffy asked, examining a freshly
painted fingernail in pretended disinterest.
?Well, for one thing...?Giles sighed, ?It?s a very old spell. How it
wound up in that book that Willow had is quite frankly beyond my
comprehension. If my research is correct it dates
back to the time of the Ancient Greek civilization. It?s also extremely
powerful. It?s a good thing Willow hadn?t finished reading that spell.?
?Uh, really? Why?s that?? Buffy asked, unable to hide the subtle squeak
in her voice.
?Well, any love spell is dangerous, but this one was supposedly graced by
the Greek Goddess of Love Aphrodite. As you?ve already witnessed someone
under a love spell can be incredibly dangerous.? Buffy nodded, remembering
the time that Xander had tried to cast a love spell on Cordelia, and it had
affected every woman but Cordelia, Buffy included. ?This spell is much more
powerful than the one Xander and Amy cast. The effects could have been....I
can?t
even begin to fathom it.? Giles said, noticing Buffy shudder. Buffy
wondered what Willow would have done if she hadn?t gotten carried away by
the passion of the moment, or if she had tried to restrain Willow the way
she had wanted to at first. The power that Buffy had felt while they were
making love was astronomical and she truly believed what Giles said.
?And I believe I?ve stumbled upon some possible side effects of the spell.?
Giles continued, noticing Buffy?s distracted look.
?Side effects?? Buffy asked, dragging her attention to Giles worried face.
?What kind of side effects??
?Well...I?m afraid I haven?t...I mean I?m not entirely sure...? Giles
stumbled.
?Spit it out Giles.? Buffy said, her impatience starting to show through.
If Willow was going to experience some unforeseen side effect, Buffy wanted
to know about it. Then Willow?s dreams popped into her head and Buffy
thought that she knew what one of them might be already.
?Well, the spell is strange in that it is dedicated to somebody. Two
somebody?s actually. It states the wish that the two people?s threads never
be cut. Now in Greek mythology, a person?s
life was decided by the three fates. Clothos, Lachesis, and Atropos, or as
they were sometimes called, The Mother, the Maiden, and the Crone. They
each had their own jobs. One was the weaver and she wove the thread of
somebody?s life into this big rich tapestry. How she weaved determined how
somebody?s life would go. One of them simply held the thread, and dealt it
out to the weaver. I suppose, she decided how long someone?s life would be.
And the last was
responsible for cutting the thread. A person?s life ended when that thread
was cut. Now, how this affects the spell I?m not quite sure. It may have
been a spell for the two to live out their lives in
immortality, having the fate never cut their thread, or it could have been
talking about their descending line. It may have been a wish that the
Warrior and the Follower?s descendants never die out, and this spell may
have been used to see that they never did.?
?In English, Giles.? Buffy said, having lost the Watcher after the whole
three fates bit.
?Right. I?m thinking this spell was either used to bring two soul mates
together. Or to ensure the continued line of the Warrior and Follower
by...um...urging the descendents to...uh...mate.? Giles got out, blushing
furiously.
Buffy looked at him strangely, her face turning white. ?That?s
um...really...strange Giles.?
?Yes. Quite.? Giles agreed, thinking about the spell once more.
********
?Just when you think you know all there is to know about a subject, you
find out you?re wrong.? Willow reflected silently, as she paid attention in
her human sexuality and reproduction
class. ?I mean, after sleeping with a were-wolf and a Slayer, you would
think I would know it all.? Willow always found the class discussions
extremely fascinating, and she loved to hear the
various students stories about their own love lives, and the questions they
evoked, although she had never opted to share any of her own stories. She
probably would have been lucky to get two
sentences out without stuttering uncontrollably.
Today they were starting the section on reproduction though, and Willow sat
glued to her seat, fascinated about the many changes a baby went through
before it was ready to be born. The professor had brought a film to class
showing the developing baby from time of conception through the ninth month.
It was fascinating to Willow how everything about the baby formed.
?And this, is what a baby?s heart beat sounds like inside the mother.? The
professor said, playing a tape of the last sonogram she had. The sound
nearly rocked Willow out of her seat, as she sat wide-eyed and listened to
the sound she had been hearing in her dreams. ?I?d recognize that sound
anywhere.? Willow had said that earlier to Buffy, and now she was hearing it
in her reproduction class. She didn?t quite know what to make of it. She
didn?t know why she was dreaming of a baby?s heart beat. But, she intended
to find out.
**********
Dr. Wiseburg had been Willow?s family physician for as long as she could
remember. He had probably been her doctor since she was a baby. So she
felt a little self-conscious now, coming into the doctor?s waiting room with
the problem she felt she was having.
?Hello Willow.? Nurse Brackett called out to her, seeing her enter. ?It?s
been a few months since I?ve seen you. Everything going okay?? Willow had
known Nurse Brackett for about as long as she had known Dr. Wiseburg. The
kind faced, slightly chubby nurse had taken her measurements since she was
old enough to walk. ?I don?t see your name in the appointment book, are you
sure you?re due for a physical?? The nurse asked, her eyes looking up at
Willow
questioningly.
?Um, no. I know I?m not scheduled. I know it?s short notice. But, I was
wondering if Dr. Wiseburg had some time between patients.? Willow murmured,
trying hard not to run back out the waiting room door.
Nurse Brackett looked concerned as she glanced down at her appointment book.
?Well, he has an appointment at one. I?ll see if he can squeeze you in
Willow, okay?? Willow glanced at her watch. It was twelve thirty now. She
supposed she?d have enough time to blurt out her secret before Dr.
Wiseburg?s next patient showed. Willow nodded and Nurse Brackett paged the
doctor, telling him who was waiting for him, and before Willow knew it, Dr.
Wiseburg had come
out and collected her, bringing her into his office.
Dr. Wiseburg?s office was a normal Doctor?s office. Diplomas on the wall.
An examination table in the middle of the room. Medical equipment on trays
spread around the office. He had a desk sitting in one corner, which he sat
down at and motioned for Willow to take the visitor?s seat. Dr. Wiseburg
was an older man, who Willow guessed was somewhere in his late fifty?s.
?So, Willow, what can I help you with?? Dr. Wiseburg asked, expecting to
be hit with some innocuous teenage problem.
?I think I?m pregnant.? Willow whispered, unable to meet his eyes. That
had not been what the good doctor had been expecting, anything but that. He
had known Ira Rosenberg?s daughter since he had delivered her. He would
never have expected her to have unsafe sex. But here she sat, in his
office, looking as troubled as he?d ever seen her. The doctor in him took
over before he could think too much about it.
?Well, why don?t we find out, huh? Then we can take it from there.? He
said kindly, then buzzed the nurse through his intercom. ?Nurse Bracket,
postpone my One o?clock to Two, all
right??
?Yes Doctor.? Willow heard the reply through a haze, as well as everything
that happened after that. The examination itself was a blur to her, which
was good in a way because she probably would have found the whole thing
completely embarrassing otherwise. Dr. Wiseberg
took some blood and had it sent to the lab, then told Willow that the
results would be available in about a half an hour and that if she?d like to
get comfortable and wait in the waiting room, he would call her when they
were ready. Willow nodded, waiting for him to leave before she got off of
the examination table and got dressed. Her fingers were shaking so badly
she could hardly button the buttons on her sweater, but sooner than she
would?ve thought she was back in the
waiting room, her stomach in knots as she waited for the results.
She tried thumbing through the year old magazines that were sitting on a
table in the waiting room, but she kept feeling Nurse Brackett?s concerned
eyes resting on her and she found it hard to concentrate on the words.
Also, her mind kept flashing to Buffy, wondering what in the world she was
going to say to her if it proved her suspicions were correct. Worst yet,
she couldn?t imagine how in the world she would?ve got in the position she
was in. She hadn?t slept with a guy since Oz had left almost two months
ago, and she had had a period since then, although she was due for her next
one in about a week. She had a sneaking suspicion this one wouldn?t be
coming on time though.
Willow was so deep into her thoughts that she never even heard Dr. Wiseburg
calling her name until a gentle hand was placed on her shoulder. ?Come on
into my office, Willow.? He said gently, and Willow nodded, avoiding the
questioning glances of the Nurse. Feeling more queasy and light-headed then
she had ever felt, she followed the Doctor into his office, swallowing hard
to keep the contents of her stomach in place.
?Well?? She asked, nervously. Her voice squeaked in fear. Dr. Wiseburg
looked at her soberly, his kind, gentle brown eyes looking at her
sympathetically.
?Well, I?m not quite sure how you knew it...but you are three weeks
pregnant.? Dr. Wiseburg said, confirming Willow?s darkest fears.
Willow?s eyes closed upon the tears she felt building up in them. She
brought a trembling hand to her mouth, holding in a sob as the tears
overflowed her eyelids and dripped down her cheeks.
?Willow, I know how overwhelmed you must be feeling right now. And you
shouldn?t make any decisions at this time, but there are three choices that
you can make about your situation. They should each be discussed with your
parents and your partner, then you?ll be better able to come to a conclusion
about what it is you want to do.? Dr. Wiseburg said, trying to be
supportive, and give some much needed information to the young person.
Willow looked up at him, question in her eyes, and he continued. ?It?s
still early in your pregnancy. We could just end the pregnancy.? The
shocked and offended look in Willow?s eyes
told him that wouldn?t be an option she would consider, and he should have
known just from her being Ira Rosenberg?s daughter, but he felt it should be
mentioned anyway, just to cover all the bases. ?Of course, if that?s not a
viable option for you, there are always good families waiting to adopt a
baby. A family who could love and support a baby, but maybe can?t have
children of their own.? This suggestion didn?t bring as much as an offended
look to Willow?s face, though he could tell that she wasn?t sure if this was
the way that she wanted to go. ?Then of course, you could always keep the
baby. I?m sure you have enough emotional as well as financial supports
around you to help you to raise the baby yourself.? The doctor was thinking
of Willow?s parents, but Willow?s thoughts flew immediately to Buffy. Buffy
was the only person who ever completely emotionally supported her. She
supposed they would find some way to go about the
financial part.
?I?d like to set up regularly scheduled appointments for you during your
entire pregnancy, to help ensure that you and your baby remain healthy and
also to discuss prenatal and post natal
options with you, all right?? Dr. Wiseburg asked, once Willow had composed
herself.
Willow nodded, and then stood not wanting to take up any more of Dr.
Wiseburg?s time then she already had. ?Thank you.? Willow said, although
she wasn?t quite sure what she was thanking him for.
?It?s all right, Willow. Everything will be okay, you?ll see.? Dr.
Wiseburg responded trying to reassure the young woman. ?Please see Nurse
Brackett about setting up your next appointment, and try not to worry,
okay??
Willow nodded, not knowing what to say, then stepped out of the office. She
quickly set up an appointment for the next week, then left the doctor?s
building. She wasn?t quite sure where she
would go, but she needed to take a walk and clear her head.
Willow walked through the park on the way to the dorm, struggling to find a
way to tell Buffy what had happened. She didn?t notice any of the other
college students that were having lunch there, or the students that passed
by her talking to each other. She was wound up in her own little daze of
misery. ?I mean, what do I say? I can?t just walk up to her and
say...Guess what, Buffy? I?m pregnant.? Willow thought sarcastically.
?She?ll probably think it?s Oz?s or that I cheated on her. I really hope
she doesn?t think I cheated on her. I?d never cheat on her.?
?What if she freaks? What if she doesn?t believe me? What if she doesn?t
want children and thinks that I should end the pregnancy?? They had never
really talked about children, or if
Buffy really wanted any. And then there was the whole passed down from
generation to generation thing of Buffy?s. Buffy might be worried that any
child she had would be destined to be the next Slayer. What if Buffy
thought that it would be better off not even being born?
Willow wasn?t even sure what she herself wanted. The only thing that she
did know was that she did not want to end the pregnancy. She couldn?t. Her
parents would never look at her the same way again. If she told them that
is. But beyond that, Willow wasn?t sure if she could end a life...any
life...especially not a life that was taking root inside of her. She
definitely could not end the pregnancy. So, that left her with two options.
Adoption, or keeping the child to raise herself. She wasn?t sure how she
felt about either of those options. Part of it, she knew, would be hinged
on Buffy?s reaction to the whole situation. Willow knew that she couldn?t
make a decision
without her.
Willow had always wanted to have a child when she was growing up. She had
always fantasized about some day marrying Xander Harris and having a child
with him...maybe two. The fantasy had changed as she had gotten older. Oz
had taken Xander?s place in her heart and her dream. And then, Oz had left
and the dream had turned fuzzy for a while. Until the morning she had woken
up in Buffy?s arms and she had finally known where she was meant to be. And
now it looked like the dream she had from childhood was coming true. It
wasn?t the time she would have chosen, she would have liked to finish
college first, but if this was the time it had to be then she wouldn?t
begrudge it.
Letting herself into her dorm room, Willow was surprised to realize she was
completely exhausted. She went over to her bed and lay down, pulling the
covers over her head as she curled up into a fetal position, her hand
resting on her stomach, and immediately fell into a deep sleep.
Willow dreamed again of the sound of a baby?s heart beat. Yet this time,
not all was dark. She was amazed when she saw the shape and definition of a
fetus. It?s not quite formed features swam in a protective pool. Willow
was engulfed in a feeling of such love and devotion for the unborn child
that it overwhelmed her. She knew at that moment that she would do anything
to protect this child.
*********
Buffy came back from Giles place and found Willow curled up in her bed.
Willow was mumbling something in her sleep, but Buffy wasn?t close enough to
make it out. She looked at the position her lover had chosen to sleep in,
and her eyes shadowed with worry as she walked over to Willow?s bed.
?Will?? She called out gently, moving red hair off of her friend?s face.
?mmm, bring the bottle.? Willow mumbled in her sleep, her eyebrows
scrunching up as she twitched in her sleep.
Buffy grinned slightly at the comment, wondering what her lover was dreaming
about. ?Will, you?re dreaming.? Buffy whispered, stroking a freckled
cheek. She watched as green eyes blinked open then focused in on her own
blue eyes.
?Buffy?? Willow sat up, confused. She wondered how long she had been
asleep. She glanced at the clock on the bedside table, shocked to see that
it was four o?clock and that she had slept for
several hours after she had come home from the doctor?s office.
?Will...are you okay?? Buffy asked. It wasn?t often that she came home to
find Willow in bed during the middle of the day. She could only remember
one instance when Willow had the flu.
Willow thought blearily about that question for a little while. Was she
okay? Well, it depended on how you looked at it, didn?t it? Buffy was
starting to get worried at Willow?s silence when Willow finally answered
her. ?Uh, yeah. I?m okay. I mean I?m not sick or anything...it?s just...?
Willow started babbling then made herself shut up before she just blurted
it out. She didn?t want to bowl Buffy over while she was still standing.
?Just what?? Buffy asked, an uncomfortable feeling starting to rise within
the Slayer.
?Um, I kinda need to tell you something, but I don?t want to do it with you
standing up. Can you come here?? Willow said, moving over a little to give
Buffy room to sit down. Buffy sat down next to Willow, her body tense as
she waited for whatever Willow had to tell her. Her eyes met Willow?s and
she saw the fear in Willow?s green eyes.
?What is it?? Buffy asked, a thousand possible answers running through
her head.
?You remember when I told you that I?d remember that sound in my dreams if
I heard it again, anywhere?? Willow started, not quite sure where she was
going with this, but she knew she had to start somewhere.
?Yeah?? Buffy said, as confused about where Willow was going with this as
Willow was.
?Well, I heard it today. In my sex and reproduction class.? Seeing the
confused look on Buffy?s face, Willow continued. ?My teacher played a tape
of a sonogram. It was the same sound. The sound of a baby?s heart beat.?
Willow could see confusion mixing with a dawning realization swimming in the
Slayer?s blue eyes.
Buffy?s mind flashed back to her conversation with Giles and the sudden
realization almost knocked the breath out of her. ?Will...are you...?
Shock immobilized her mouth as she saw
Willow nodding at her.
?I?m going to have a baby.? Willow whispered, seeing the shock fill the
beautiful blue eyes beside her. ?The doctor says I?m three weeks pregnant.
I?m so sorry. I don?t know how it happened.? Willow gasped out, starting
to cry as she anticipated Buffy?s anger and rejection.
Buffy shook her head as she tried to let the news sink in. ?This is
unbelievable.? She whispered. The news took it?s time settling in between
the layers of disbelief and shock that were protecting
the Slayer. ?I?m going to be a ?father?? This is really unbelievable. If
I didn?t know it were true, I wouldn?t believe it.? Buffy thought to
herself, the enormity of the situation sitting squarely on the Slayer?s
shoulders.
?Buffy, please say something.? Willow pleaded after Buffy hadn?t spoken for
what seemed like forever. The Slayer was being too quiet, like the calm
before the storm, and Willow was just waiting for Buffy to freak out and
start yelling and screaming at her.
Buffy finally pulled away from her internal thoughts enough to notice the
flow of tears that were streaming down Willow?s face. ?Oh, Will. I?m
sorry. Come here.? Buffy whispered, pulling her lover into her arms.
?You don?t hate me?? Willow cried, her arms wrapping tightly around Buffy.
?Why would I hate you, Will? This is all my fault.? Buffy said, wiping the
tears off of Willow?s cheeks.
?What? I don?t understand.? Willow said, the expression on her face
showing just how confused she was.
Buffy?s face was intense as she looked into Willow?s. ?It?s the spell,
Will. Something happened to me that night. I?ve never felt anything like
it before, or since, that night. At first, I just thought it was...you
know...being with you. It was bound to be intense. But that night, Will, I
felt different.? Buffy saw that Willow?s confusion hadn?t cleared and swore
softly. ?I wish I knew
how to describe it to you. I wish you could remember.? Buffy said, running
her fingers through Willow?s red hair and cupping her cheek. ?Whatever went
through me went into you too.? Buffy
remembered that moment so clearly in her head. The slow build-up of
whatever force that had been in control that night, and the moment it had
merged the two together for a timeless instant. Buffy shook her head,
shaking off the still startlingly clear and pleasurable memories of that
night.
?Anyway...from what Giles said. This is the purpose behind the spell.?
Buffy said, gently resting her hand over Willow?s abdomen.
?Does he know?? Willow asked, wondering if Buffy had told Giles the whole
truth while she had been there.
Buffy shook her head. ?No. I wasn?t quite sure how to bring that up.
Besides, I kinda wanted to be sure before I went into the ?lets see if we
can make Giles stutter uncontrollably? stage.? Willow
shared a smile with Buffy at that, imagining what Giles reaction to that
would be.
They sat in contemplative silence after that, each wondering what the other
were thinking. Finally, Willow?s hesitant voice broke the silence. ?What do
you think we should do??
Buffy took a long breath and let it out slowly. ?Well...I guess I could
quit college and get a job. We?ll probably have to move out of the dorm,
although I definitely think you should continue going to college. The baby
should be here sometime around July...I think. That would give you almost a
month before your next classes started, and I could stay home and take care
of the baby while you were in classes...either that or get a baby sitter. I
wonder if my mom would be able to help out sometimes.? Willow watched Buffy
in amazement. She had obviously given this a lot of thought.
?Buffy. You want to keep the baby?? The surprise in Willow?s voice made
Buffy stop and look at her.
?Well...I just assumed that?s what you would want, too. Do you want to give
her up?? Buffy asked, the very thought of not knowing her own child tore at
the Slayer?s heart. But if Willow wasn?t ready for the responsibility,
Buffy supposed she would have no choice but to go along with it.
Willow shook her head. ?I guess I just didn?t think that you would want to
keep her.?
Buffy looked at her with soulful eyes. ?Why wouldn?t I? She?s mine.? She
said, her hand curling protectively on Willow?s stomach.
Willow smiled at how possessive Buffy was already. She rested her head on
the Slayer?s shoulder, and they rested back on the bed. ?I guess we have a
lot of decisions to make, huh??
?Yeah, like how we?re going to tell our parents....and Giles.? Buffy said,
wrinkling her nose.
Thinking about telling her parents made Willow shudder. ?Yeah. But at
least we made the most important decision.? She said, resting her hand on
top of Buffy?s on her abdomen.
?We?re going to have a baby, Will.? Buffy whispered, awestruck. Willow
smiled serenely at her, and for the first time felt good about the news she
had heard that day. She kissed Buffy gently and then snuggled into her,
content to just lay in Buffy?s protective embrace and watch the shadows on
the floor move their way across the room as the sun set on the prospective
parents.
The end (Till next time)
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