Red Skies at Morning
by TheBear
Chapter 7
[reviews]
Part 7
========== BtVS ==========
"How long have you had... more than friends feelings for me?"
Willow had just resolved never to bring up her romantic feelings again, not wanting to threaten their friendship, and Buffy had to go and ask that question.
Buffy waited a moment, and there was no answer. "Willow? How long?"
Willow was suddenly worried again, as though waiting for the other shoe to drop. She tried to distract Buffy from the subject, "It's not a problem, Buffy. Really. I mean, I never let it mess things up between me and Xander, right? I promise I won't bother you..."
Buffy shut her down, "Don't, Willow. Don't do that. I know you were miserable a lot of the time with wanting Xander, and having him ignore your feelings." She brought her left hand to where Willow still gripped her right and gave her fingers a gentle squeeze between hers, "I need you to trust me enough to tell me anything- no secrets. I want to trust you the same way..." she trailed off, waiting hopefully for Willow to answer her question.
Willow looked down at their joined hands and made an effort to keep any pain from her voice when she answered. "I think I started having feelings for you since you sat down next to me on your first day at Sunnydale High.
Buffy gasped, "Have you always liked..." she trailed off again.
"Girls?" Willow supplied. "Yes," she answered simply.
Buffy was a little thrown. "But Xander..."
"Oh I like boys, too," Willow interrupted. "I like both girls and boys." Not without some bitterness she continued, "That gives me twice as many opportunities to be rejected."
Buffy squeezed her fingers, wincing at the emotional pain Willow had lived with for so long. Essentially abandoned by her parents, living with unrequited love for her best friend, feeling rejected not only by every boy she ever liked, but the girls too.
Willow reminded herself of her intention to keep the pain out of her voice. "Anyway... When I first saw you with Cordelia I thought you looked so pretty. I was sad to see you with that bitch."
Buffy was shocked to hear that word from Willow's mouth, but she kept her own shut, sensing that Willow needed to get this all off of her chest without discussion.
Willow continued, "So then when you came and sat down with me, and you were nice to me, well I guess I was naturally attracted to you." She sighed deeply and kept going, "Well, I didn't really pay attention to it, I mean I'm attracted to lots of people... then when you fought the master- even though you knew you were going to die..." she looked up sternly at Buffy- don't you think Giles told us how you were going to quit and run away? And then you came over here after Cordy and I found those bodies, and you comforted me and you went and fought him. It was just like a romance novel- at least it was for me- like you were going to leave but your love for me made you go out and slay the dragon, or vampire in this case, but you get the picture." She stopped, realizing she was about to babble away. "Pathetic, Huh?"
She didn't give Buffy the opportunity to answer, pre-empting her with, "I didn't start dreaming about you until that night Angelus was going to kill me in the school... I just knew I was dead, and then you were there. Again with the swooping in to save the day like the romance hero to save the heroine. I dreamed about you that night- that after vanquishing the evil villain, you swept me up in your arms and we kissed..." she thought for a moment about all the wonderfully romantic dreams she'd had about Buffy.
Seeing the look on Willow's face she couldn't help but ask, "Just kissed?"
Willow looked up at her sharply but relaxed when she saw the smile. With a boldness that surprised her a little, she answered, "In *that* one."
Buffy raised an eyebrow, "Oh? There've been others?"
Willow continued with the boldness, "Oh yeah!"
Buffy's eyes widened and sparkled playfully, "Willow Adena Rosenberg!"
Willow grinned- it was that grin that showed her bottom as well as top teeth. When you saw that grin you knew that she was, for that moment at least, truly happy. A happy Willow made Buffy very happy.
Still playful, but also curious, Buffy asked, "Like the dream you were having this morning?"
Willow's grin slipped away as the events of this morning once again came to the fore.
Buffy sighed, seeing the joy in Willow's eyes dim. "Willow, we need to get past this. I'm not mad about anything that happened this morning, except for the part where I bailed on my best friend in the world, but as long as she forgives me, I'll get past it."
Willow searched Buffy's face, looking for any hidden resentment. Not finding any, she calmed a bit, but asked, "Why do you want to know?"
Buffy wanted to put off her own confession until she heard the answer to her question. Not so much because she was stalling, but because once she started, she knew it was going to be a long talk. Plus, Willow had really affected her and she was curious to know what they were doing together in her dream that precipitated that activity.
"I actually have something to tell you, Willow. Something important, but I want to know what you were dreaming about first." Seeing the hesitation on the redhead's face, she added, "Obviously, you were dreaming about us having sex. I'm ok with that Wills, really. I could tell it was really hot, and I want to know what it was."
Willow examined her face for another moment before saying, "Ok." She dropped her eyes once again- focusing on their joined hands. There was no way she could look Buffy in the eyes and say what she was about to say.
"We were in a bedroom- neither of ours- and you were on the bed, naked..." she paused, waiting for any negative reaction. Not receiving any she continued, thinking, "Ok, here's the hard part..." Outloud she revealed, "You were... t- tied..." she trailed off, not believing she was actually saying this to Buffy.
Buffy's breath quickened at the thought of being bound. She had never imagined playing such games, but the thought wasn't making her feel anything but hot. "Hands and feet?" she asked breathlessly.
Willow goggled at the question- more to the point, at the lack of disapproval in the question. "Uh, yeah... you were tied to the four corners..."
When Willow paused again, Buffy asked, "Were you naked too?"
Willow was quickly moving into a state separate from reality. Buffy's acceptance of this line of discussion gave Willow the feeling that they weren't really having this talk- that this, too, was a dream. As she began to relive the dream for herself, she was able to describe it- divorcing herself from reality and consequence, and just going with the flow.
At Willow's silence, Buffy asked, "Tell me Willow. What were you wearing?"
Willow answered, her voice slightly dazed from the state she was in, "I had leather boots on, thigh high, with really high heels... I don't think I could really walk in heels that high. "I had a corset on, it really pushed up my breasts..."
Buffy had her eyes closed, imagining the scene. "What else, Willow?" she asked, eager for more.
"Nothing," Willow answered.
Buffy groaned quietly at the mental picture she drew- filling in the details from her peeping-tom act the other morning. "Were you touching me? In the bed, you had one hand playing with my breasts." She whispered.
Willow's own breath began to quicken at the memory. Her eyes closed involuntarily and she lost herself in the dream- "Oh, yeah. I was pinching your nipples, pulling on them. Hard. You were begging me... I moved one hand down your stomach, you were so wet... I asked if that was for me..."
"Mmmh!" was Buffy's only response.
Willow snapped out of the dream, remembering the waking up and wiging out part. "Ok, I can't believe I just told you that!" she said, embarrassed.
Buffy willed her breathing to slow and deepen. After a moment she was able to speak almost normally. "I know you're embarrassed, Will. But that was just about the hottest thing I have ever heard."
Willow was momentarily proud, "Really?" she asked with a grin.
Buffy exhaled abruptly and said, "Oh yeah! Are they all that hot?"
Willow was embarrassed again, "God! No! I mean sometimes we do... stuff... but, that was the first time it was ever so..."
"Kinky?" Buffy supplied.
"I was gonna say, 'intense,' but... yeah."
Neither said anything for a moment, just sitting there, holding hands, looking into each other's eyes.
Buffy broke the silence, "Willow, do you trust me?"
Unhesitatingly, Willow answered, "With my life, Buffy. You know that."
Buffy clarified, "Do you trust me not to hurt you?"
Willow thought about it for a half-second before answering. "I trust you never to hurt me intentionally..."
Buffy smiled sardonically, "That's fair." She paused a moment, working up the courage to say and do what she was about to say and do. "Willow..." she trailed off as she gazed intently at the redhead, willing her to go along with this request. "I just have to know!" she thought.
Willow furrowed her brows at Buffy's intense stare. "Buffy?" she whispered, not understanding what was happening.
Buffy knew this would be a turning point in their relationship, regardless of the outcome. It would either be a hurdle for them to overcome, or the beginning of something different, and very possibly wonderful.
"I want to kiss you."
Willow's breathing rate rose by half and her eyes dilated. "But... I thought..."
Buffy interjected, "Thinking and talking in a few minutes, I promise. Right now feel, don't think."
Willow's eyes locked onto Buffy's lips as she moistened them with the tip of her very red tongue. She felt her head nodding of it's own volition, and then she saw those lips get bigger as they approached. Her eyes closed and she felt those soft moist lips on her own. She had fantasized about this moment for over a year, and she couldn't believe it was really happening! Her brain froze. All she could do was obey Buffy's instruction and feel.
Buffy's own eyes closed as she felt the gentle sensation of soft, soft lips against her own. She began to move hers slowly against that sweet softness, suckling at Willow's pouty lower lip, sliding her tongue out and tracing the outline of her upper, and then between them and against her teeth, seeking to enter her mouth.
Willow felt the sensation of Buffy's warm tongue against and between her lips and sighed in utter contentment. She opened her mouth to Buffy's questing tongue, still passive to the experience. She had never been kissed before, and regardless of how often she had fantasized about it, the reality blew the dream away.
For her part, Buffy compared the experience against those of her past. Never in her life had a kiss been so relaxed and soft and warm like this. Angel's kisses had always been hard- desperate and needy and cool. His tongue had been demanding, his kisses possessive. Boyfriends from Hemery had been less experienced but just as demanding and possessive. Honestly, kissing was always fun, but this was sublime. Though not aggressive, she was the initiator; she was kissing Willow, not being kissed by her, if that made any sense. Judging by Willow's little whimpers, she was doing a good job of it.
Though unsure of exactly what to do, Willow began to make tentative movements of her tongue against Buffy's, amazed and delighted by the feel of Buffy's tongue wrestling gently against her own. Buffy's tongue withdrew slowly and Willow chased it into Buffy's mouth. She began to hesitantly explore Buffy's mouth, delighting in the feel and sensation of her teeth and gums, never having experienced anything like this before.
Buffy gave a little moan when Willow began kissing her back. She withdrew into her own mouth, inviting Willow to follow. She was obviously inexperienced, but eager. Still, so soft and gentle in her movements! Buffy enjoyed the feel of these languid and unhurried kisses; imagining that she could spend hours just dong this. She unconsciously drew Willow into her lap, her arms wrapping around her sweet, lithe body.
When, several minutes later, Buffy pulled her lips away from her own, Willow was surprised, but not displeased, to find herself in Buffy's lap, her arms wrapped around the slayer's neck. She wanted nothing more than to live in this moment forever, but she was confused and afraid of being hurt. So she couldn't stop herself from asking, "Why?"
Buffy knew the time for discussion was inescapable. She too would have liked nothing better than to continue kissing this gorgeous woman in her arms forever, but they needed to talk first.
"I had to know," Buffy said with a sigh.
"What? What did you have to know?" Willow asked. This kiss, her first, was like a dream come true, and now she was sure the dream was about to come crashing down... And yet, she was still in Buffy's lap. She still had Buffy's arms around her. She was confused.
Buffy leaned back against the arm of the couch, but didn't let go of Willow. It felt too good to have her in her arms. "I had to know if it would be as good as I imagined," she said, finally.
Willow was still confused. All she could say was the very unimaginative and repetitious, "What?"
Closing her eyes, Buffy began her confession, "After I bailed on you this morning; after I worked out some frustration and confusion on those two vamps," she amended, "I thought about what happened and how I felt about it." Opening her eyes and looking into Willow's frightened gaze, she explained, "Willow... I've *never* been interested in other girls, that way... this way," she added, clearly indicating the position they were in. Before she could protest, Buffy continued, "When I woke up yesterday, and we were all tangled together... It didn't wig me out at all. In fact... I liked it. I didn't know why, but..."
Willow, remembering that moment, unintentionally spoke, "It was nice." She blushed when she realized she had interrupted, but Buffy just smiled.
"It was nice, really nice. So nice that I really didn't want it to end." Buffy paused, reliving the moment, and the event immediately following, "Then, when I saw you in the shower... touching your..."
"OH MY GOD!" Willow shouted in mortification, wishing she could die right then. Wishing that the Hellmouth would open up and swallow her. "I can't believe you saw me! I- I'm so embarrass..."
Buffy quickly reassured her, "Shh, don't. It was amazing... you were so hot, so sexy... I couldn't get that image out of my mind all day. When Xander made that comment about getting a camera... I was embarrassed because I kinda felt the same way!"
Willow was still horrified. "How long... did you hear me..."
Buffy wondered what could be even more embarrassing, given the way she was acting. "Did I hear what?"
"Willow had such a strong subconscious urge to hide that she pulled her hands from around Buffy's neck and covered her face. Still she managed to mumble out, "I kinda... moaned your... when I..."
Buffy caught the gist. "I only stayed for a couple of seconds. I should have stayed longer, 'cause it drove me crazy all day wondering who you were thinking about." Before Willow could engage in any more self-flagellation, Buffy quickly moved on. "The point is, I was turned on by seeing you do that. It wasn't disgusting or horrifying- it was exciting."
Willow was taken aback by Buffy's admission. "Really?" she asked, disbelieving that anyone, least of all Buffy Summers, would be attracted to her.
Buffy recognized that Willow was fishing for complements, but she was willing to give them. "Yes, really! And, when I came in after you were unconscious, and I had my back to you while you were drying off?"
Willow just looked at her, not following her direction.
Buffy ducked her head and said, "I- I was... kindacheckingyououtinthemirror."
It was said so fast that Willow didn't catch it. "What?" she asked, bewildered.
Buffy sighed and repeated, "I was checking you out. In the mirror."
Willow was stunned. "Checking *me* out?" she whispered to herself.
Buffy whined in her pouty voice, "It's not my fault! All that wet, sexy flesh; how could I help myself?"
Willow was sure she must be dreaming. "Y- you think... I'm... S- sexy?" she stuttered. I don't understand, Buffy. What's going on here? What is this?"
Buffy smiled at her bewildered best friend, "hopefully girlfriend," she thought. It was the first time she had actually used the word, even in her head, but she was finally sure. After that kiss, well, there was no question of compatibility. She was totally besotted- mentally, emotionally and physically with the lissom redhead perched in her lap. "This is me explaining to you how I finally figured out what I wanted... although we didn't get to the part where I talked to my mom about it yet."
Willow's mind was once again spinning in circles. "What do you mean, what you want?" After a moment the other thing Buffy said hit her and she squeeked, "You talked to your *mom* about this?! Oh God! I can never face your mother again, Buffy!"
Addressing the second concern first, Buffy said, "Calm down Willow. Mom was surprisingly un-wigged by the whole thing. She actually told me I had to do what would make me happy, and not worry about what anyone else would say."
Willow goggled at that, "Is she sick? Did she have a fever?"
Buffy laughed out loud at the seriousness of Willow's questioning. Rather than address her mother's possible illness, she answered Willow's first question. "What I want... what would make me very happy..." she gulped in sudden and inexplicable nervousness. "...is if you would consider..." she trailed off, not sure how exactly to say it.
Willow stared at her like a deer in the headlights- "She can't mean... she doesn't..." her mind locked into a holding pattern, frozen, awaiting the next input before it could begin processing again.
"Would you..." Buffy tried again. Finally she just asked, "Can I be your girlfriend?" At the stunned silence that followed, Buffy added, "I love you, Will; and... and I think I'm falling in love with you too."
Willow was seriously baffled by this turn of events. She decided that if it was a dream, she was going to enjoy it for as long as she could. And, if it was reality, well her heart was skipping happily through the tall grass, singing 'tra la-la la-la' in pure happiness. She leaned forward to Buffy and once again began to softly kiss those lips that she had been fantasizing about for so long.
"That feels like a yes!" Buffy screamed exultantly in her head, not wanting to break the kiss to verbalize it. This was way too much fun to stop anytime soon.
They spent the next several hours until dark making-out on the couch.
========== BtVS ==========
The End