Desperate measures
by mike
Passing time
[reviews]
Chapter 3
Passing time.
Willow was all set on having some fun until she saw Buffy's painful transition across her face. She leapt forward to catch her friend as she collapsed. Pulling her out of the pouring water, she gently cradled her body. Stroking Buffy's cheek and gently encouraging the unconscious girl to wake up.
"Buffy, come on Buffy. You're scaring me. Please wake up." Willow repeated over and over, rocking and rocking, stroking and stroking.
"Ohhh," Buffy moaned as her eyelids began to flutter. "What happened to me?"
"I don't know. You were smiling and then your face went through these terrible expressions that looked really painful and then you fainted. But how do you feel right now?" Willow asked with her hand still cupping Buffy's cheek as hazel and green eyes were locked on to each other.
"I think I'm OK. I remember thinking that you looked like you wanted to have some fun playing in the water. And I was thinking how much fun it would be and then this voice started speaking. It was really low but insistent. It was telling me all these awful things and the voice got louder and louder telling me the world would end over and over and that's the last I remember." Buffy hadn't moved and was still captivated by the green eyes above her. Then she realized that she was naked and Willow was naked and holding her so lovingly. Buffy was relishing how wonderful it felt to be this close to Willow and she could feel herself flush and begin to tingle all over as she became more and more aware of the beautiful soft body pressed so close to hers. That's when the voice started again. The moment she heard it, she broke from Willow's arms and stood up.
"Willow, I think I'm going crazy." Buffy said as tears began to roll down her cheeks.
Willow heard the fear in her friend's voice and stood up and began to approach her.
"Stop, don't come any closer. Being near you causes the voice in my head." Buffy spoke as she held up her hand palm out in a stop signal.
"How could I cause the voice? We've been close before. Why now Buffy?" Willow's voice was strained.
"It's not you being close exactly. It's more what I'm thinking when you're close, especially naked and close." The last few words were barely a whisper and Buffy had lowered her head in embarrassment.
"We need to talk about this Buffy. Something strange is going on and we need to get to the bottom of it. But let's get some clothes on and go over to the kitchen where we can talk over a soda or something." Willow grasped the essentials of the situation just as Buffy finished speaking. She had a near epiphany of what her friend must have been thinking when the voices bombarded her mind but knew to get to the bottom of this they needed to move things where any stimulation could be kept minimized.
"That sounds like a great idea. Think Anya left us any clean clothes or does she want us prancing around naked all the time?" Buffy asked without much hope in her voice.
"I noticed a button on the wall next to the bench. Let see what happens when we press it." Willow said with a flare of adventure.
The both approached the wall. Buffy stood back by the bench as Willow pushed the large gold button. With a quiet whoosh, the wall folded up to reveal a shallow closet with hanging clothes and some things on a few shelves. Both girls immediately discovered the panties were all thongs. No pants, just very short, low riding shorts. Tops were bare midriff halters and tees. The hanging clothes were all sheer, low cut or some other form of revealing.
"I am so going to kill Anya. Have you found any bras yet?" Buffy looked at Willow while holding a sheer black blouse against her body, her breasts barely hidden creating an alluring sight that instantly drew Willow's gaze, a gaze she couldn't break until Buffy saw the salacious look on the redhead's face.
"Sorry." Buffy exclaimed, turning quickly away from Willow's piercing eyes.
"Oh goddess Buffy, I'm so sorry but you just looked so lookably delicious I couldn't help myself." Willow frantically exclaimed.
"It's OK Will. Any other time and I would have been very flattered but right now I can't afford to go there." Buffy soothed her friend without turning. "Lets just get something on that isn't see through."
Both girls quickly dressed in nearly identical outfits of shorts and halter tops. Only the colors were different.
They both finally felt comfortable looking at each other and chuckled at each others appearance.
"We look like hookers. Can I hold her while you kill her?" Willow asked shaking her head.
"I'd be honored." Buffy smiled gently.
They then headed over to the kitchen where they found coffee all made. Fixing themselves each a cup, they sat at the intimate table for two.
"Buffy, I know this is going to be difficult for you. But we both need to be open and honest or we are going to be here a very long time. In addition, I suspect that someone has been messing with your mind. I think its past time to uncover this. So please tell me about this voice. Does it sound like anyone you know and what does it say?" Willow spoke encouragingly while restraining her desire to reach out and hold her friend's hand.
Buffy took a deep breath and then another, letting it out slowly.
"The voice is almost familiar, but it's muffled so I can't be sure except that it's a man's voice." Buffy got out the easy part, dreading the next.
Willow waited patiently for Buffy to proceed. She watched those beautiful dark green eyes look down into her coffee before proceeding.
"I would start to have thoughts about you. They are nice thoughts but the voice tells me that I'm disgusting. It tells me that I am only attracted to men and that I desire only men. Then if I try to argue or keep thinking thoughts, it tells me that a slayer can't be with a woman or the world will end. Then it just kept repeating; be with a woman and the world will end getting louder and louder until I blacked out." Buffy gave a quick sigh at the end.
Willow gathered her thoughts. Buffy had filled in the gaps and she knew her original suspicion was right.
"This voice, had you ever heard it before we came here?" Willow asked sweeping her arm around.
Buffy glanced at her and then looked down again. "Yes, there have been other times."
"Do you recall the first time you heard it?" Willow asked softly wanting to keep the tone even and steady.
"I think so. But it was a little different the first time. It was a soft whisper, offering a suggestion, encouragement. It was at the Bronze, just before Xander tried to have a fling with the bug teacher. Do you remember the night when Angel gave me his leather jacket?" Buffy looked up again this time keeping her eyes on Willow while she waited for an answer.
"Yes, I remember. That was the first time that I'd seen him. Xander was very put off by how handsome he was." Willow smiled remembering how young and innocent they were.
"Well, when I saw Angel the voice encouraged me. It told me that I needed a strong man. It told me how attracted I was to him. I thought it was just me telling myself that, but now I don't think so. When I found out about Angel being a vampire, the voice encouraged me to forgive and understand him. There were other times when I thought about it being not a good idea to be dating a vampire when the voice would convince me otherwise. But the voice wasn't pushing me towards Angel specifically, it was just telling me that I needed a man in my life and Angel was the strongest."
Buffy sipped her coffee, looked at Willow's friendly face then looked at the ceiling that faded into nothingness. Returning her gaze to her coffee she continued.
"The first time it was negative was the time we went to the zoo and Xander became hyena boy. We were walking next to each other and you had one of your incredible smiles on your face. You just looked so adorable that I thought how nice it would be to kiss you. The voice said I was disgusting and I felt a little queasy. There were other times over the years. The first bad one was when I was all worried about you over Moloch, jealous actually." Buffy hung her head a little more than looked up at Willow to see the gentle friendly face hadn't changed. Encouraged, Buffy looked back at her coffee and picked up where she left off.
"There were actually numerous times when I would get the gentle reminders, but the next big one was the Halloween where I got you to dress up all sexy." Buffy's face paled as the voice dug at her for the memory of her friend's deliciously sexy body.
Willow saw the look on Buffy's face. "Buffy, it's OK. Just breathe and relax, take a big breath. You know it's not you now. And we'll get to what it really is very soon if you can just keep going."
Buffy followed Willow's instructions, taking several minutes before her face was fully relaxed once more.
"Thanks Will. Anyway, it's been happening over the years. All this time I just thought that I was psychologically damaged, I even though I was homophobic. But I discovered that wasn't the case the day you told me about Tara. I felt like all the air had left my body when you told me. I felt this incredible sense of loss and then the voice told me it was OK. That it was good that you had a girl friend and how I wouldn't be tempted by you anymore. I realized then that while I had a personal problem with becoming intimate with a woman even though I thought about it a lot, I didn't have a problem with you being gay. In fact I remember feeling happy but the happy was all overwhelmed with the feeling of loss and the confusion about me. That's the real reason I behaved so strangely that day. I had all those thoughts and feelings whizzing around in my head playing bumper cars."
"I am so glad you told me Buffy. I can't tell you how good knowing that makes me feel." Willow spoke softly and kept smiling.
"There were a few other bad times and if you think about it, you'll probably figure them out for yourself. The voice did continue encouraging me towards men. Like Parker and Riley. After Oz left, and you and I were spending lots of time together, the voice was quietly nudging me all the time. Every time I just wished you would say forget Riley, that you were there for me, the voice would go all negative. So I followed the path of least resistance, thinking that I needed a man in my life. So Will, am I crazy or did someone mess with my head?" Buffy pleaded softly once again looking into the emerald eyes of her best friend.
"Oh, I am positive that someone has messed with your mind, emphatically so." Willow nodded.
"Now we need to figure out who and when. Then that should lead us to how and why. Once we have those I'm pretty certain we can evict the little squatter." Willow now gave Buffy's hand an encouraging squeeze.
"Well when is before Angel at the Bronze but probably after the harvest." Buffy said thoughtfully.
"Why after the harvest?" Willow asked wondering how Buffy had narrowed it down so tightly.
"Well before coming to Sunnydale, I had thoughts about other girls before without any voice telling me it was wrong. Then the first time I met you when I asked you to help me get caught up, I had a few thoughts of how nice it would be studying with you up in my bedroom." Buffy's voice got really shy and quiet at the end. Looking up and seeing Willow's friendly smile spread into something even more wonderful she felt no apprehension about telling the rest while keeping her eyes on Willow's face this time.
"After the harvest, you were a little sweaty and you still smelled so good and I got this thought of showering with you, running my soapy hands over your body and DAMNIT, SHUTUP YOU ASSHOLE!" Buffy screamed putting her hands to her throbbing head as the voice began to strongly castigate her.
Willow reigned in her impulse to pull Buffy into a comforting hug. She gripped the edge of the table tightly as she watched Buffy slowly get herself back under control.
"I can't believe that asshole was me for all those years." Buffy finished by taking a deep breath.
"It was probably part of the original suggestion to not think about the origin of the voice. But now that you've recognized it, the wall is ready to come down. And I know how to do it." Willow said confidently.
"The sooner the better." Buffy told her with pleading eyes.
"OK, remember what happened after Glory grabbed Dawn? How I entered your mind that was looping around?" Willow asked her.
"Yea, not one of my finer moments." Buffy hung her head.
"Buffy, your reaction was OK. You suffered a great loss and went catatonic. I on the other hand turn into a murderous bitch and try to end the world. Of the two, yours was the by far the better." Willow did squeeze Buffy's hand this time.
Buffy smiled back at her and then frowned. "Uh Will, didn't that require magic?"
"Yes and no. What makes me so strong with magic is my natural abilities. Abilities I have that do not require magic but enable me to tune into magic more easily. Basically, over the years I have enhanced my psychic abilities to enhance my use of magic. I've avoided moving things with my mind even though it doesn't required magic because it kinda opens my senses to the flow of magic around me. But I can do it without tapping into magic. That's what I'm going to do. I'm going to guide you back to that time between the harvest and Dr. Gregory getting killed." Willow was so confident and upbeat, just like she used to be in high school. The view of her best friend's bubbling expression, reminding her how she always stood with her no matter what, gave her goose bumps of joy.
"I trust you." Buffy told her with complete honesty.
Hearing those words Willow couldn't hold the emotions down. Tears of joy just sprang from her eyes. "I won't let you down Buffy. I love you."
"I love..." Buffy was stopped as Willow's fingertips covered her lips.
"Could you hold that those words and wait until this is all over? Then I would very much like to hear what you really feel. Can you do that for me?" The sincerity in Willow's face made Buffy withhold all her questions.
"I can wait 'till after our trip down memory lane." Buffy smiled reassuringly.
"Thank you Buffy. Let's move over to the bed and make sure we are comfortable 'cause this may take awhile." Willow, who hadn't let go of Buffy's hand, slid her fingers to interlock with the strong supple fingers of her best friend and led her towards what she hoped would be their destiny.
"I want you to lie on your side facing towards the middle of the bed with your knees drawn up." Willow said as she took up her matching position.
Buffy took her position and got comfortable.
"Now close your eyes and listen to my voice. Take a deep breath and hold, hold, hold, hold now release slowly, slowly you're almost done, you're done. Hold, hold, hold, hold, now slowly inhale on four three two one and hold, hold, hold, hold, and release four three two one hold, hold, hold, hold, inhale four three two one ......
They were just walking out of the Bronze after defeating the Master's vessel. They were all feeling the excitement and relief of post victory. The relief of being alive without fully confronting that they could have died something that teenagers did innately. Buffy looked around her friends and smiled. She couldn't believe that she wasn't alone. She had friends who helped her. Her fear of them getting hurt she reconciled as a motivator to fight harder to make sure it didn't happen. She didn't want to let go of this feeling, the feeling that she wasn't alone. Glancing over at the giddy redhead next to her as they walked towards Giles's dilapidated car she noticed the sweat beading on her forehead, sliding down the side of her face along her neck. Thoughts of running her tongue along her slender neck and lapping up the salty sweetness made her heart race.
Throwing an arm around her new friend she whispered "I can't thank you enough." Willow responded "Not necessary, we're closer than needing thank you's." Willow's smile completely disarmed her. All she could do was give her a hug before climbing into the back seat with her for the ride home.
Giles had dropped everyone off at home except Buffy. "Buffy, I'm very proud of how well you did tonight. Also the chairman of the council would like to meet with you as soon as possible. It will only take a few minutes. Would you mind stopping at my home to meet him?" Giles's voice was calm, almost emotionless.
"No problem, better to sneak back into my room after mom's asleep anyway." Buffy still felt euphoric over the evening's accomplishments.
Giles pulled into his drive. This was Buffy's first visit to Giles's house. They passed through a court yard and Giles unlocked a massive wood door. Sitting in a large arm chair was a balding, roundish man with an insincere smile who stood up as the entered.
"Ah Miss Summers. It is a true pleasure to meet you. I trust everything went well tonight." His smile was so phony Buffy nearly frowned. She became instantly suspicious.
"Buffy, this is Quentin Travers. He would like a few words alone with you. I'll be up in my room. Just call when you're ready to go." Giles then left and walked up the stairs.
Quentin watched him depart and when he heard the door close he turned his greasy smile to the young woman in front of him.
"Merrick told you that we discovered you late." This was not a question so Buffy waited for the next words out of his mouth.
"And all the reports we have received continue to describe how, without early training, you achieve success beyond our expectations." Thinking his complement would disarm the young girl he barely disguised his shock at her reply.
"So you expected me to be dead by now." Buffy's statement was inarguable.
The oily man smiled like an octopus. "Well, you are blunt. Then let me be blunt. We hadn't expected you to survive very long. But you have so impressed us. That's why I have a something special for you." With that he held up his hand, palm out. Buffy instinctively glanced at the upraised hand where her eyes became enchanted with the pulsing blue stone held there.
As Buffy's eyes glazed to an iridescent blue Quentin waited until he was certain the impressionable girl was fully under.
"Do you hear me?"
"Yes."
"There is a special place in your mind. The things I tell you will reside there from here on out to guide you along your proper path. Open the door and invite my voice in to become one with you."
"The way is open." Buffy intoned without emotion.
Quentin proceeded to recite a litany of do's and don'ts about Buffy's personal relations. Reciting from a carefully memorized script he droned on for nearly an hour. His last words were "Treat these words as your own. Integrate them into your own beliefs. Never suspect them of any origin other than your own. When you awake in the morning, all you will remember is Mr. Giles dropping you off down the street from your home and you sneaking back into your room. This visit never occurred and if we ever meet in the future, you will not remember this visit. Do you understand?"
"I under... " The door flew open before Buffy could finish. Willow came screaming in, her hand outstretched and a blast of green lighting shattered the pulsing crystal in Quentin's palm. With a wave of her hand the slimy beast was flung to the floor. Willow grasped Buffy by her shoulders and captured her eyes.
"Buffy, do you hear me."
"Yes."
"The door is still open. Enter the door and kick the bastard out. You don't want him there. He forced himself upon you. Enter the room and kick him out." Willow drove every word in like a nail.
Willow could feel Buffy's internal fight to overcome all the programming backed by powerful black magic. Willow lent her all the strength she could without magic, relying on Buffy's strength to succeed. As Buffy's eyes began to clear to their normal green the smile on Willow's face grew proportionately until Buffy's eyes focused and saw her friend.
"Willow, you saved me." Buffy's arms went around her friend and drew her in tight.
"Time to go home my love." Willow whispered and opened her eyes to see Buffy slowly open her own where they lay side by side on Buffy's bed in the strange room Anya had exiled them to.
"Hi." Willow said softly.
"Hi." Buffy smiled.
"Welcome back. How do you feel?" Willow reached out and grasped Buffy's hand.
"Good. I feel good. Do you really think it's gone?" Buffy said hopefully.
"Only one good way to find out." Willow leaned forward and pressed her soft lips to those of her best friend and the woman she had been deeply in love with for six years. The kiss started softly, with gentle pressure slowly turning into slow delicate suckling of lips. Buffy let go a moan of ultimate release truly signaling the demise of the terrible voice. She responded slowly and as she felt no adverse thoughts, pressed on more passionately. The kiss swiftly progressed to the passionate dueling of tongues. Sliding hands over lots of bare skin increased the heat between the two impassioned friends, expressing long over due desire. Buffy slid her hand under Willow's top causing the redhead to moan deeply as Buffy's fingers stroked her nipple.
The few clothes they had on were quickly removed and lips, tongues and probing fingers sought to pleasure each other.
Buffy could no longer contain herself. Years of forced repression of her love for her best friend rode on waves of her passion. "Oh Willow, I love you so much. I've been in love with you since the first time we met."
Swirling darkness encompassed the oblivious new lovers as the transition began.
*****************************************
"Anya, what the hell have you done?" Xander exclaimed as Willow disappeared from before their eyes.
"I did just what Willow asked for, nothing more and nothing less except for a few enhancements of my own invention." Anya replied with a jutting jaw.
"Oh my God, Willow said until Buffy admits she's in love with Willow. They'll never be back." Dawn almost whined then caught herself, remembering how dark Willow had used that against her.
"Oh don't be silly. They're already back." Anya declared with a casual wave of her arm.
"But they just left? And if they are back, where are they?" Dawn asked in what she hoped was merely a concerned voice and not a whine.
"Anya what...?" Xander didn't finish as the finger of his former fiancé and current vengeance demon pointed at him.
"The place I sent them exists out of time. So no matter how long it took them, no time passed for us. They are in Buffy's bedroom and hopefully will still be there when you arrive. They just might be a little older is all." Anya said with a wicked smirk on her face.
Dawn beat Xander out the door as he stopped for his keys. In five minutes they were dashing through the front door of the Summer's house with Dawn in the lead. Taking the stairs two at a time Dawn burst into her sister's room. "Buffy!..." She froze at the sight in front of her. Her straight sister and her best friend were naked on Buffy's bed intertwined in the oldest of embraces. This took her all of two seconds to absorb. Realizing Xander was about to reach the bedroom, she grabbed the doorknob, pulled the door closed and held up her hand. Xander's chest ran right into it.
"You can't go in there." Dawn spoke forcefully with just a quiver in her voice.
"What do you mean?" "I have to see if they are all right." Xander tried to push past her but Dawn threw herself in front of the door.
"Xander, they are fine. They are just sorta indisposed right now." Dawn tried to keep her voice calm to dissuade his protective impulses.
"Oh Buffy! That's the spot! Oh goddess...!
Dawn's face turned crimson and Xander's jaw dropped to his chest as Willow's cries were clearly heard through the door.
"Xander, if you go in there, they'll kill you." Dawn delivered the obvious while trying to avoid bursting into nervous giggles.
"I know, but it might just be worth it." Xander smirked, his true nature never far away.
"Oh Willow, that feels incredible. Please don't stop, don't ever stop." Buffy's voice loudly proclaimed.
As Xander leaned forward, Dawn pushed him towards the stairs. "Go home and take a shower Xander, a very cold one. I'll call you when you can come over. I'm pretty sure they're going to be in there for awhile, a long while." Dawn gave Xander a final shove towards the stairs and as he slowly left, she turned and looked at the door. A knowing smile slowly suffused her young face as she fully acknowledged what had just occurred.
"You're finally happy Buffy. And I am so happy for you." Dawn turned to leave the long over due lovers to make up for years of stolen time.
The End.