Girl's Night Out - Too
by Exiled-Too
Part Two
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Part Two
`She moved in circles, and those circles moved....'
By Theodore Roethke.
Tonight everything in my life is going to change. It will change utterly and completely. Whether I'm all snuggled up in my bed or if I'm out hunting Buffy, it doesn't matter. I know it, I feel it, I've been dreaming every night for the past week.
I check the clock and yep, it's exactly 2 minutes later than the last time I looked at it. My stomach growls because I haven't eaten since this morning. I haven't been able to keep anything down for the past two days-thus I don't want to eat ...
It's been two weeks since Buffy ducked out on me. And it's hurt. I didn't know I could hurt like this, like I can't breathe, can't catch my breath because something is missing. Buffy is missing in my life.
I thought I could give her more time, I thought I could be cool with her needing space. Except, my dreams tell me that time just ran out. A dread has been building inside me for the past two weeks, the dreams have been intensifying, and tonight everything has reached the zenith.
Something's coming and I can't stop it. I get up from my bed; it doesn't matter if I'm ready to leave a few minutes early. It's taken me two weeks to prepare for tonight and no matter how yucky I may feel I will stick to my plan, I have too.
I walk around my empty, lonely, dorm room collecting the spells I need, thinking about Buffy. I haven't been able to turn my brain off for the entire two weeks. Something's not right with her, something is very wrong and she won't talk about it. Normally I can tell what's going on in her head; her face is so expressive. It's easy to read her if you just pay attention. But lately it's been impossible.
I know that she's avoiding me because she's never let us be alone. I tried to catch her at home twice last week. Mrs. Summers' answered the door both times, which was good. I'm glad she's recovering so well from her surgery. 'Damn, I'm drifting again...
...I can tell that she's avoiding me because she's never let us be alone. If I show up at her house, somehow she knows it, and she leaves through the back door. If I walk in on her while she's training at the Magic Box she suddenly has to have Giles show her some a new move.
'Stop this Willow your tummy is going all yucky again .. Think of, think of the spell you don't think you should use.'
'No, you have to get this out or you'll just stand in front of Buffy and cry when it comes time to talk.' So, ok, the only time we've exchanged more than a word or two was during the weekly Scooby meeting on Thursday. Ergo, the avoidance. I realize that I had been standing next to my bookcase, lost in thought for a good five minutes, which means I'm going to be late if I don't hurry up.
I have to stop by my dresser to stock up on pixie dust; it should work on one or two vampires and requires little energy to invoke. Most of my spells are low grade energy users so I can use more of them, thus knocking out more targets. The only problem I have in stopping by my dresser--is that it has a picture of Buffy on it--and I nearly start to cry again.
'I have to deal with these feelings now .'
To say I'm a little miffed at Buffy's avoidance is like saying the Hoover Dam is a Beaver Pond. After she blew me off two weeks ago, I came home and circled today on my calendar. I did that for several reasons, one I was so angry I wanted to either turn her into a frog or put a truth spell on her. Both of which would be against the ethics I chose when I signed up for the Witchey lifestyle. So I wanted a cooling off period. The second reason was that Buffy might have actually been telling the truth; that she needed to get home to her mother. So I wanted to give her time to come to me and talk about what was going on.
'Ha! Like that would ever happen in this lifetime!'
And the final reason I waited, it's also the most important: I wanted to be able to protect myself from Sunnydale's nightlife. I have a responsibility to not to take stupid chances with my life. I don't want Buffy to be destroyed because I was dumb. The fact is: I know that Buffy loves me. She's told me twice now. She would die if I were killed and she wasn't there to protect me.
Love comes with conditions. The first is not to take stupid chances with your life.
"Hear that Buffy! You love me and you have to tell me what's wrong so I can help fix it!"
Seven days ago the dreams started. Faint at first, just a series of sensations, then over the past 3 days they have grown into full-blown-surround-sound colorful dreams. It's almost like the dreams are what Buffy calls her "Slayer dreams." They always begin the same, they just end differently.
I shake myself out of my thoughts; I so cannot do the dream interpretation thing right now. That's enough dealing, I'm going to be late.
I look at the clock and gather the rest of the supplies I need to go out safely on a Saturday night in Sunnydale. I bought Old Navy Cargo pants and an Army surplus jacket just to carry everything. The name on the coat is A. Smith . I sure hope whoever A. Smith was that she had good luck with it. Now I know I'm delaying the confrontation. The irony is nearly overwhelming, that I'd been waiting for this moment for two weeks and when the time comes I'm late.
Buffy's Saturday night patrol route will almost bring her right to me. Restfield is just three blocks from campus. Close enough that the risk is small, far enough away that Buffy will insist on walking me home.
"Stop delaying and just go, Willow!" I tell myself, I'm worried that this will be the end. That I won't be able to get out of Buffy what I need to and she'll just float out of my life.
I check one last time to make sure I have everything, I can't believe how nervous I am, my palms are sweaty. Well, actually I can believe how nervous I am. My life is going to change after tonight; I know it, I feel it.
I glance around the room one more time; I don't know if I'm delaying or if I really am trying to be careful for Buffy.
I check my spells one last time; I'm very comfortable with most of the spells I carry. I think I could take on as many as 5 or 6 vamps at once and survive. But Vamps aren't Glory. There is one spell I have that I'm not sure will work. Heck, even if it does work, there's a kink or two I just haven't figured out yet.
The nightmare I had the other night comes back to me: Buffy's lying broken and bloody at the Goddess' feet. I grab up the spell, stuff it in the inside pocket of A. Smith's coat and head out the door. It will be a last resort type thing ...
***
If Buffy follows the route then she should be right over that hill; of course it depends on how many vamps she has to fight and where. 'Then again she might be a little ahead of schedule.' I think as I see a slight figure crest the hill. The vision is dramatic, the moon shining off her bright hair, her head held high and proud. Her gate screams warrior or ancient Goddess, and did I mention proud, well I meant it. With a capital P. Whatever vibe she's giving off it goes straight through me, I want to rush up to her and kiss her; or have her rush down to me and command me. I'm torn as to which one I want to happen the most.
I have to stomp down on the feelings; Buffy will be able to sense them and I really want to have this conversation. Oh Goddess she is something, it's not so much her beauty because, hey 50 feet away and it's dark—but there's something—her strength? Nah, I can't see her strength, she's just different tonight. There's some kind of current running beneath the surface in her, there is a bright light coming out of her that I thought was the moon and now I'm not so sure.
And damn! I can tell the exact moment that she senses me because there is a tiny hint of a pause in her step and the light is extinguished as if it were never there. The strange feeling of current is also gone and some part of me misses it. Maybe it was all my imagination?
Maybe I just thought I saw it, felt it? I know I do see her shoulders slump, creating a defeated curve to her neck, and her feet starting dragging with each step she takes. I realize two things at once, that I was right, this was the only the way I was going to get her alone and that she needs to talk to me. That she's missed me as much as I've missed her.
"Will." Buffy doesn't so much as greet me as acknowledge that I'm here. "She-I wondered how long it would take you to think of meeting me." Buffy stops in front me, stumbling over the words.
"Buffy, we need to .."
"Talk?" She finishes for me, raising a fine eyebrow. "Yes, I know." She sighs and then motions for me to follow her. "I'll walk you back to the dorm, though it looks like you came hunting for bear." She indicates my unusual dress.
"Well a girl's gotta protect herself." I say, trying to lighten the depression I can feel settling over her.
"That is true Will," she answers in a defeated voice. "Willow, about that night," What goes unsaid is that I know exactly what night she's talking about. "I don't know what's going on with me, ever since that enjoining spell I've been feeling kind of weird." She stops and turns toward me and for the first time in weeks she reaches out to me.
Her touch on my cheek is light, gentle, soft. It's hard to believe that the woman before me can literally bend steel because I barely feel it as she lifts a strand of hair out of my eyes. I can't help the gasp of breath I take; I can't help the fire that burns down my spine when her fingers dance across my face. I see her eyes dilate with desire right before it arcs back at me through her hand...
A profound sense of connection springs up between us, so it's the most natural thing in the world for me to lean slightly down and tilt my head right as she tilts her head left...
It's through this connection that I realize when the first demon nears the top of the hill. That's why I have the spell out before it can reach us. Buffy seems momentary stunned, then she springs into action fast enough to grab the sword from the demon that I incinerate.
She plants her feet and swings the sword like a baseball player trying to hit a home run. It slices cleanly through one demon's midsection, only to be stuck in another's shoulder. Three more short demons rush over the hill while Buffy tries to free the sword and I knock them out with a sleep spell.
"Willow we have to run, those are Glory's scabby minions!" Buffy yells, grabbing me by the arm and pulling me down the path. We only get a few feet before more come out of the woods, cutting off our escape. Buffy doesn't stop, she dodges one's swinging sword while kicking another in the head so hard that I hear bones crack. As it falls to the ground she catches its sword.
The next one is decapitated and I watch in fascination as the gore from it arcs high in the air, spraying both of us. Some of it gets into my eyes and by the time I can see again we are surrounded... surrounded yes, defeated no. Buffy now has a sword in each hand and she's moving so fast she's just a blur. Time seems to slow as she whirls around me slaughtering the demons.
After, I don't know how long, time has no meaning--the Slayer stands tall in middle of the battlefield--still surrounded by demons, only now they're all dead. I'd never seen her move like that, I've never seen her be so ruthless, she hacked them to shreds with their own weapons.
She stands there, and both the light and current have returned. She's covered in gore and blood, and I see at least one long gash that's going to need stitches on her side, but she is stunning. Through the connection I feel her pride and hunger. I am being pulled to her as if by a string, I take the first halting step.
Then she turns away from me and all the weird indescribable energy flows out of her. The bond collapses in on itself.
'Beyond words, beyond silence ..' Runs vaguely through my mind.
She slumps her shoulders and when she looks back at me I feel... a sense of guilt, of shame and humiliation.
"So now you've seen," she says sadly, looking away again. I can't speak, I'm still shaking from the battle, from her incredible ...
A blur rams into her, throwing her 30 feet, into and through the side of a crypt.
"She killed all my minions!" Glory stands before me with her hands on her hips. "Do you have any idea how hard it is to get good help now-a-days?" The insane God asks me. "I think I'll kill you."
"No .." I hear Buffy shout, and we turn to watch her laboriously climb out of the wreckage. She falls to the ground, then slowly stands again. "Leave her alone." She orders, before going back down to one knee.
"Hey, it's only fair, you kill mine I kill yours." Glory tells her reasonably, strolling up to Buffy. "Unless you give me my key?" She asks hopefully. Buffy just shakes her head.
'I am such an idiot!' I think, as I reach inside the pocket of my coat and pull out the spell ingredients. I should have had the spell ready to go.
"Ok then, I'll kill your friend." Glory turns back to me only to have Buffy jumps on her, knocking her to the ground. "Hey, watch the dress, it's an original!" The God moves so fast I can't follow her but when she stops Buffy's back on the ground curled in a ball, bleeding. Glory reaches down and pulls her head up by her hair.
"I want you to watch while I kill your girlfriend." Then Glory drops her and stalks over to me. Out of the corner of my eye I can see Buffy trying to stand, only to collapse back to the ground. I want to tell her it's ok, I have a plan, only if I told her it wouldn't be a surprise... it would ruin it, or not ruin it so much as let Glory know about it.
Babbling in my mind, not smart.
I have to time it perfectly, so I wait until the God is reaching for me before I throw the marking powder in her face--then I say "Discede!" There's just enough time to see her look of surprise before she's teleported somewhere ..
"Well that worked better than I thought it would," I tell Buffy slowly walking to her. She's still struggling to stand up, I reach down to offer her a hand up. "We need to get going, between all the blood and the magic something is going to ..."
Then things suddenly go all wonkey on me, like the earth is moving ... An earthquake?
"Your nose is bleeding Will," Buffy tells me as she's finally able to get to her feet. A pressure is building in my head. My sight is going so it looks like there are two or three Buffys instead of one.
"Willow?" She asks, as she places a trembling arm around my shoulders, supporting me when the ground moves again. "Willow, we have to get gone, I feel more demons coming ..."
'What's happening to me?' As the pressure just keeps building and building in my head until I think it's just going to explode. I have to get away from it.
"Will?" Buffy catches me before I hit the ground, for some reason she can't hold me up like she normally would be able to do, so we both fall.
I feel her pull me into her lap, and she strokes the hair out of my face. "I'll get us somewhere safe, I promise." She tells me, as exhaustion rises up to smother me.