Loving Willow More
by Rin
8
[reviews]
A/N: Hmm...
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The Bronze was a blast. It was good to see old friends but once again, Buffy and Willow were late, and Anya was uncomfortable around the new boys in the group. Nobody was sure how to take Riley, Graham, and Forrest quite yet, especially Anya; she just got a weird vibe from them that she didn't like. As soon as the new arrivals got drinks, their beepers went off, and they had to make excuses to leave. Faith eyed them curiously, wondering exactly what was up; as far as she knew, neither Buffy nor Willow even had a pager.
During patrol earlier that night, they had bonded like old times. They were playful, and took out demons and vamps left and right with synchronicity. When they were waiting around for a fresh grave to break, Faith started the drill.
"So, you and Red, huh?" Faith was flipping the stake in the air, and catching it with ease.
"Yep. Me and Willow." Buffy's sappy grin was heartfelt but Faith still rolled her eyes in amusement.
"When did that happen?" She started juggling three stakes, and Buffy smirked at the display of boredom.
"Almost two months ago." Buffy just leaned against the tombstone, and watched for signs of the vampire to crawl from his grave.
"How does it feel?" Faith stopped juggling her stakes, and plopped down with an audible thump against an adjacent headstone.
"Amazing...beautiful...exhilarating..." Buffy was on cloud nine. Willow's last class was cancelled that day, and she was at the dorm sooner than usual, so they had time for some naked fun before Buffy took off for patrol with Faith. The blonde knew that the brunette could smell her girlfriend all over her, since they cut it right to the minute, giving her no time to shower.
"I get the point." Faith tossed a stake at her, blunt end forward. No need to stake your own people.
"I don't know, Faith. It's like...everyday we're together, we grow stronger. I know she still has a slight harboring for Fred but none of that comes between us; it's like it never happened. None of that crystal business happened; we're just Buffy and Willow, totally in love, no holds barred." She sighed longingly, already feeling the familiar stirrings again after only an hour. Willow was like her drug of choice, and she had no intentions to ever attend a Willow Anonymous meeting.
"I gotcha. I mean, I've never really been like that; relationships aren't my thing but I getcha. It's easy to love Red...don't tell nobody I said that, though, or I'll kick your ass, Blondie." Faith gave a scowl, and pointed her finger for added emphasis.
"Aw...Faithy..." Buffy chuckled, and took the light back tap on her shoulder that Faith let fly. "I've been in love with her for some time, even before the crystal was an issue. Loving Willow is the easiest and hardest thing I've ever done in my life."
"Why the hardest?" The ground started to budge, alerting them that the newbie was trying to escape its grave.
"It scares me that I'm making her an even bigger target for the baddies because I love her. She's my Achilles heel." Buffy stood up, and dusted the dirt from her butt, gripping her stake with one hand; Faith mirrored her actions.
"Huh?" Faith bounced from foot to foot, excited that there would be some release of energy. She loved this part.
"My weakness. If anything ever happened to her...I don't know. I know it sounds melodramatic but I don't think I could go on, fighting the good fight every night." Buffy stretched her arms above her head. They could sense a group of three vamps walking a few yards behind them but knew that the vamps didn't sense them...yet. "I would just...shut down. She's my reason for fighting, not all of humanity, although that's a plus. Having the weight of the world on your shoulders doesn't seem worth it if I can't protect the one person that means more to me than my own life."
"Wow, B...that was sorta poetic, or some shit like that." Faith pulled the vamp the rest of the way from the ground, and didn't even bother prolonging the fight. The other vamp threat needed more attention, since the two slayers could tell the three were older, which meant they would exchange blows better. Buffy allowed her to stake him, knowing that the brunette loved the fight.
"Yeah, well...it's the truth. Sometimes...sometimes I think that I would shirk my calling if it weren't for Willow." They started creeping up behind the other vamps, hiding behind larger headstones, and studying what they were doing. Apparently, the three vamps were planning a night at the Bronze themselves. Unfortunately, the slayers were there to ruin their plans. After playing a little, just for fun, the girls dusted them with gracefulness that belayed their primal nature.
"That's deep, B." Faith stretched her arm muscles after disarming.
"I really love her, Faith. I mean...REALLY love her. It's not that silly puppy love; this is a lifelong deal, and it makes me want to be the best slayer I can, so that I can come home every night to her. Everybody knows that slayers have short life expectancies but I want to change that, and I want you to do it with me." Buffy's eyes widened when she saw the sexual innuendo in her own comment that was causing Faith to smirk. "Work at living longer, I mean."
"I gotcha, B. No harm no foul." Faith sent her head back, and cracked her neck to relieve some tension in her collarbone. "I'm with ya. Let's make slayer history...not that we already aren't because there's two of us and all but you know what I mean..."
"Yeah, I gotcha, Faith." Buffy smirked, and the two girls took off to get ready for some Bronzing. The blonde picked up Willow, who was dressed comfortably but absolutely gorgeous (not that she wouldn't look gorgeous in anything she wore). They actually had to take time out to relieve Buffy of some of that 'hungry and horny' bit that Faith was always raving about after they patrolled. The redhead never did have any problems acquiescing to this simple fact...one that she enjoyed quite immensely.
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Fred had FINALLY come out of her room, and had FINALLY taken off Willow's hideous pink fluffy sweat. Cordelia was elated, and managed to drag the girl to Caritas. After several drinks, Fred was somewhat slurring her speech, and nearly toppling out of her chair. Cordy mentally scolded herself for not paying more attention to how many drinks the girl consumed. Looking at the two empty glasses, and the one half filled, she realized that it apparently didn't take much. The young student was currently talking to a blue-skinned demon that seemed more interested in her cleavage than Fred herself. Cordy sidled up on the barstool next to her, and caught the end of their conversation.
"It's like something out of Fitzgerald: the man who can have everything but love. Well, maybe in some ways you're better off because love is...well, in a way it's everything. But it's also heartache and disappointment, and those things are good to avoid." In her inebriated state, she was barely aware of anything happening.
"Fred, I think it's time we headed home." Cordy tugged at her, and grabbed their jackets. The other girl made no movement to protest, and just followed her friend all the way back to the Hyperion. Getting there, Cordy helped her best friend get to the bed. Halfway up the stairs, she'd started crying again, and it was unnerving. Tomorrow, the former cheerleader had every intention of helping Fred out of her funk, and possibly move on from Willow.
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"What do you want to do today?" Buffy stretched her muscles out across her bed, and watched Willow put her things away from class. After finishing her own classes, the blonde had met her girlfriend for lunch, then came back to sneak in a nap before Willow got back from her final class.
"I have an idea but I'm not sure if you'll like it." Willow placed her philosophy book on her desk, and turned back around to the blonde with a sheepish grin.
"I'm sure I'll like it. There's nothing I wouldn't like if you were there." Buffy got out of her bed with one final stretch, and moved to embrace the redhead. "Now, what is it you have planned?"
"Well...I was thinking that maybe..." Willow knew this was a big step in their relationship. They'd been together three months, and things were beyond perfect. However, she wanted to make it even more perfect if possible. Unfortunately, segueing Xander into them as a couple was harder than they originally thought, and it was taking too much time. Time they could spend doing couply things, even though they did those to an abundance, not that either was complaining. As their relationship progressed, Xander regressed further into bliss. The only person that knew in their group was Faith, and the dark slayer liked to egg them on during research at Giles's, making off-hand comments about them that were clean but full of innuendoes. Anya immediately would snap up the innuendoes, and think that they were directed at her and Xander instead, so it was safe but not progressive in their 'coming out' together, even though everybody knew their sexual preference status already. It was just the Xander issue; they knew it would break his heart, and neither wanted that, either.
"Come on, Wills..." Buffy kept them in a loose embrace, sliding her arms down around the redhead's waist.
"Okay, this sounds silly but do you think that maybe we could move the beds together, and make one big one? I mean, we don't have to if you don't want but I thought it'd be nice, and we wouldn't argue about which bed to use at night, and we could go shop for a bigger..." Willow was cut mid-babble by Buffy's soft lips. "I'll take that as a good sign?" Her little kid, hopeful voice made the blonde smile warmly.
"It's an 'oh-my-god' yes." Buffy pulled them together tighter, and squeezed Willow's ass playfully, which elicited a slight squeak from the redhead. "I was just thinking about shopping, as per usual."
"There's an Arden B in the new mall." Willow chirped up; turns out her idea wasn't that crazy. Buffy's awe-struck, excited expression and body language told her that.
"I'm having a wicked shoe craving." Buffy leaned forward, and kissed Willow sweetly on the mouth.
"I thought we put you on the patch." Willow arches an eyebrow in mock admonishment, and her playful quip receives her a playful wiggle.
"Those never work." Buffy was grins and giggles, as the girls gathered their purses, and made their way hand in hand downtown to the new mall. Once there, Buffy went on a super high, as she bought a few new pairs of shoes, and Willow bought a new pair of orange sneakers. Bags in one hand, and the others entwined together, the girls made their way from the shoe store. "Where to next?"
"I was thinking we could maybe shop for a comforter now?" Willow beamed, walking with a bounce to her step. They walked into the closest designer store, and started talking about color schemes, decorative pillows, and sheets. Walking through a few more stores (with a short break for mochas), the girls finally decided on a nice navy down comforter, a few matching decorative pillows, and new maroon 700 thread count Egyptian cotton sheets. In conclusion, a paradise between sheets was in the making. "Hey, do you wanna make out in public?" Willow had her excited face on that Buffy never could ignore.
"Where did that sudden burst of sultriness appear from?" Buffy moved her body out from being directly beside Willow's, and using their clasped hands, swung herself back in before kissing the redhead briefly on the cheek.
"Last time I checked, that's not making out...unless I'm doing it wrong." Willow raised her eyebrow, and smirked at her girlfriend's cuteness.
"No, you have it mastered." Buffy grinned smugly, looking up between batted lashes.
"Darn tootin'! You're not the only super hero in this one Starbucks town. Just call me Master...er, Mistress Make Out, wronging bad kissers and saving good ones." Willow beamed. For some reason, her usual cloud nine emotions were tripled. Just being near Buffy had something to do with that but mostly it was because she was WITH Buffy. They were an 'us.'
"Well, as long as you're not the one doing the kissing, then I guess that's fine." Buffy again leaned over, and this time captured her lips in a tender, lingering kiss. Since they were still walking, they had to end the kiss, or risk running into somebody, or something. It wasn't on their 'to do list' for the day, so they just started their walk back to their dorm. On the way there, they would stop briefly for some smoochies, and that's how they were found by Buffy's mother, who was driving by at the exact moment that Willow allowed the blonde's tongue entrance into her mouth. They were surrounded by noise, and since it was still light outside, there wasn't a vampire threat, so the two girls just focused on the soft moans and mews coming from each other. That's why they missed Ms. Summers's Jeep pulling up on the curb beside them, and the reason they were startled to death when she blared the horn. "Oh, shit."
"You can say that again." Their breaths were still coming in pants from that last kiss (and also from the slight heart attack from the sudden intrusion), and Willow jumped back from Buffy as though shocked. They hadn't told Ms. Summers they were an item yet, and from the look on the older woman's face, they were about to get 'the talk.'
"Girls, why don't you get in?" Joyce had that mom tone of voice that left no room for arguments, so the girls climbed in the car. Buffy climbed in the front, saving her girlfriend the discomfort of mom peripheral vision while driving. Both of them just fiddled with their shopping bags until they reached Revello Drive. The oldest Summers was quiet the whole drive over, and didn't speak until they were all seated in the living room. Faith was upstairs reading comic books, listening to music, and doing whatever Faith does during the day. "Is it the crystal?"
"What?! Mom! No, the crystal's gone." Buffy took a deep breath. During the whole ride over, she was getting scared of the silent treatment. When her mom gave her the silent treatment, it usually meant she was either in trouble, or was going to be soon.
"Then...how did this happen? I don't understand." Joyce looked from girl to girl, confusion etched on her face. The last she had heard from either of them, Buffy had come home to do laundry a month ago, right before the night that she missed roast beast, which shocked the older woman, since Mom roast beast was Buffy's favorite. Apparently, she'd found a new favorite thing to eat.
"It didn't just happen. Well, okay it did kind of but it has nothing to do with the crystal." Buffy took another deep breath, and entwined her fingers between Willow's, attempting to calm the near-panicked girl beside her. Giving a little squeeze for reassurance, she continued. "I love Willow, mom. I honestly do, and sure, I thought the same thing with Angel but this is completely different."
"Breathing, for one thing." When she noticed the wide-eyed reaction, Joyce thought maybe she should stay quiet, and let them explain. It was just a shock to be driving home from the gallery to see your only daughter swapping spit with her GIRL best friend, right in the open.
"Okay, so...it's like this. Last year, the crystal didn't have much work to do because I was already in love with her. I was in love with her before I even met Angel." Buffy smiled warmly at her adoring girlfriend, and leaned closer to her for comfort.
"How long has this been going on? Why didn't you say anything before?" Joyce looked from girl to girl again, waiting for an answer. Finally, Willow decided it was her turn to explain, in order to give her lover a break.
"Three months. It was about a month or so after Fred left. We waited until I was ready before even going on our first date." Willow smiled sheepishly, hoping that the older woman that she considered more of a mother than her own wouldn't lash out at them.
"Well, I'm glad you waited, and didn't jump into anything before you were ready. I'd hate to see Buffy hurt again. With the crystal's thrall, it was bad enough; it'd be even worse if it were real." This time, she took a deep breath. "That still doesn't explain why you never said anything. Does anybody else know?"
"Faith does but only because she caught us kissing on campus during her patrol. We should've been paying more attention but it's just..." Buffy looked to her mom, willing her to not have to finish, and luckily, she got the wanted hand gesture indicating she didn't have to explain. "We wanted to tell you, really but I...we didn't think it would be fair to the others if we just told one person. We were actually surprised, and elated that she kept the secret this long."
"Elated? Buffy, I think Willow's starting to rub off on you." Joyce gave a slight rush when she noticed the deep blush the girls turned at her comment. "Anyways, I wish you would have said something; it's a shock for a mother to see her only daughter making out in the open like that, especially when she wasn't aware that she was even seeing anybody."
"Mom, it's just...Xander..." Buffy looked to her mom for some of that motherly guidance.
"What about him?" Joyce recognized the cry for help, and was more than happy to oblige.
"He's still crazy about Buffy, and we don't want to hurt him but no matter what we do, it'll hurt him, and we've tried to ease him into the whole thing but he just keeps going backwards, and it gets frustrating because then it prolongs our telling everybody, and it's hard to act all non-couply when we're around everybody, and..." Willow's babble would have kept going if Buffy hadn't wrapped her arm around the redhead's waist, pulling them closer together, and giving a gentle squeeze. "Sorry."
"Quite alright, Willow. I think I got that you're worried that Xander will be mad at you two because he's still in love with Buffy, and that you've been trying to drop hints so that the news wouldn't completely shock him when you decide to tell him. Am I close?" Joyce smirked in her teasing tone, and Willow blushed again.
"Yeah." Willow looked at her lowly giggling girlfriend with a mock pout before turning her attention back to the matter at hand. "I just don't want to hurt him, and I know that this will but it just feels right, like...like I'm supposed to be with Buffy."
"Aww...me, too. With you, though, I mean. It feels right to be with you." The girls got an interrupting cough before their lips even had a chance to meet.
"I do wish you had told me sooner but I understand your reasoning, and as far as Xander goes, you just have to trust that your friendships are more important to him. He'll either get mad, and come back apologetic later, get angry, and never talk to you, or be happy for you. It's just a chance you'll have to take." Joyce looked at the two girls, and her expression of 'sorry that I can't make everything right in the world' eased their troubled minds a little. "Would you like to stay for dinner, girls? I can take you back to the dorm when I drop Faith off at Giles's before patrol."
"Sure, sounds great!" Willow perked up; she wished that talks with her mother were like this but she could settle with Ms. Summers. After all, there was a large possibility that she could be her mother-in-law one day.
"Good." Joyce stood up, and went into the kitchen.
"Do you need any help?" Buffy called to her mother, as she prepared to pull Willow up to her old room, and kiss her feverishly.
"No. You girls settle in for a bit. It'll be ready in about half an hour." Joyce smirked, knowing exactly what Buffy had in mind. When she heard the footsteps on the stairs, she called out to them again. "Oh, and Buffy...could you spare me a rerun of yours and Faith's 'release,' please? Thanks." She snickered; it was hard to believe that she sat stock still at their dining table about a year ago, after having been privy to Buffy's attempts at releasing the crystal's thrall. It was hard for a mother to think of their daughter as a sexual creature, especially at such a young age...but at least she didn't have to worry about pregnancy. The awkward thing is that, since then, Faith hadn't really gone out too often. It was patrol, Giles's, classes for her GED (which she had finally convinced her to get), and the Bronze. For some reason, the darker slayer wasn't as wild as she used to be...not that she was complaining.
"Dammit." Buffy cursed under her breath, as she lead Willow to her old bedroom. Head hung low, she shut the door behind them, and walked softly to sit on the bed beside her girlfriend. "Okay, so..."
"Yeah." Willow was fiddling with her hands, unsure what to do now. They'd been caught twice...this time by Ms. Summers. It was time to come clean with the rest of the group. The problem was, did they come clean about the Initiative, too?
Buffy's testing still seemed safe, and Dr. Walsh was better than fine. Willow found herself admiring the woman, and following the tests. Sometimes, the psychologist would show them the results they'd received thus far, and the redhead would bubble over with excitement. The scientist had sent Buffy out on a solo mission with a bum taser gun, and the blonde was pissed to high Hell. The redhead smiled, as she remembered the threatening words the blonde sent through her comcam to the underground lab they were waiting at. 'Professor Walsh, that simple little recon you sent me on? Wasn't a raccoon. Turns out it was me trapped in the sewers with a faulty weapon and two of your pet demons. If you think that's enough to kill me, then you really don't know what a slayer is. Trust me when I say you're gonna find out.' Willow began to panic at first, until Walsh explained that it was part of an experiment, and there were soldiers on guard if something went wrong. She wanted to test how Buffy did in a dangerous, real-life situation; she definitely got it, and when she emerged from the sewers, that was the moment that the slayer discovered that Riley, Graham, and Forrest were soldier boys. Realizing it as an experiment, she followed them back through the caves until she was back in Willow's comforting, tight embrace.
Now, the just had to make the decision about how much information to 'come out' with to the gang. It would be a hard assessment to make; that was for sure. Leaning over, Buffy kissed Willow's cheek softly, which resulted in an adoring expression on the redhead's face, and a quiet blush to creep up her neck. The blonde entwined her hand with Willow's fidgety one, and kissed their clasped hands softly, too.
"I think that...right now, we should keep the Initiative stuff quiet but it is time to come clean about us. I've waited long enough to be able to shout from the rooftops that I'm in love with you." Buffy pulled Willow's hand, and urged them to move up the bed, and lean against the headboard, giving them free reign to cuddle.
"Aww...you big softy. What would the evil of Sunnydale think of the big bad slayer now? Huh?" Willow lay her head on Buffy's shoulder, and curled her body completely into her girlfriend's, as their arms wrapped around each other in a loose embrace.
"I think that they'd know not to mess with me." She got quiet all of sudden, and Willow recognized the mood immediately.
"What's wrong?" She raised her head from its comfortable resting spot, and with concern etched on her face, looked up into Buffy's hazel eyes.
"Nothing." The blonde had that distant thing; she should've known better than to try to hide her emotions from Willow. The girl could read her like a book...and the girl had read many books.
"No...no, something's wrong. You've got your 'something's wrong' face." Willow traced the outlines of Buffy's brow with her fingertips, and the slayer sighed.
"I...it's..." She took a deep breath. "I feel that you're an even bigger target to the evil around because you're my Achilles heel. You're the one thing that means more to me than my own life. I'd die for you; hell, I already have once." Buffy giggled slightly, trying to ease the tension. "It's just...I love you so much, and I think that the baddies will use you to kill me, and if I'm completely honest...if anything ever happened to you, I don't know...it'd be like there was nothing left for me to fight for, and I'd falter as the slayer."
"Buffy, I can take care of myself, you know." Willow cupped Buffy's cheek, and lightly rubbed there with her thumb. "You don't have to be all big bad slayer all the time. If you want, you can be just Buffy with me sometimes. I'll take you any way that I can get you, and I refuse to let anything the Hellmouth throws at us to make me stay away from you. You're stuck with me, Slayer, whether you like it or not." She swallowed to gather strength. "So the baddies know how to best you? No matter...because they don't know who they're dealing with. I can't promise that something won't happen to me, just like you can't promise you'll live to see the next day. It's just the risks we take. It's love, pure and simple, complicated and solid. I'm yours, Buffy, and you're mine. We know the risks, and I'm willing to take them."
"Me, too." Buffy collapsed into tears, as she completely embraced her girlfriend. "Oh god, Wills. Me, too." She showered kisses all over the redhead's face, which caused soft giggles until their lips met in a passionate assault. Time flew by, and before they knew it, Joyce was calling up the stairs that dinner was ready, and they had to part; lips swollen, breaths labored, and bodies tingling for more.
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A/N: Aww...but there's always conflict to come...