Hey, Baby
by Rin
Old and New Lives
[reviews]
A/N: I don't want to give too much away but there was a scene in 'Chosen' that I had to alter in there. Plus, needed to bring in more of Buffy's past. *hint hint* That was more so that you didn't get too shocked, or pissed off...lol. Just trust me.
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"Everything looks good, Buffy." The girls had been more than frantic getting ready that morning. Buffy had shaved her legs a little too quickly, and cut her ankles. Willow had no problem bandaging those up for her. When they were finished, they woke Jesse, and got her ready to go with them. With everything in tow, the two lovers went with their 'niece' to see about making a baby of their own. After the doctor explained the DNA binding procedure, she answered all of their questions and concerns. They talked about everything that could and would happen. When they finished, the two girls decided that they would like to try. That's when Buffy found herself in stirrups, naked, and being probed. At least Willow was there, holding her hand through the process. It was foreshadowing of what was to come from this physical. After being in the office for over an hour, they were with the doctor again, getting the results.
"That's great! I mean...that is great, right?" Willow never let go of Buffy's hand. Luckily, she had managed to keep Jesse occupied with different toys. When the little girl wanted to be held, the redhead still could maneuver the two tasks. She just hoped motherhood was this easy.
"Yes, Willow. This is a good thing. It means that we can go through with the procedure." The doctor wasn't the easiest to see, especially since the girls had to drive to LA for the appointment. Luckily, she was an old sweetheart of Giles named Olivia, who still kept close contact. The girls laughed when they thought of their exact relationship: orgasm buddies, as Anya would call them. She was extremely nice, and Willow couldn't help but give her old mentor a thumbs up for scoring so good on the babe radar. Plus, double bonus points for getting them in to see her this quickly. It definitely helped to know the right people.
"We definitely do, want to go through the procedure, that is." Willow blushed, and couldn't hide the excitement that was on her face. Buffy just sat there with a large grin, and a faraway, dreamy look. "You okay, baby?"
"Huh?" Buffy snapped out of her dreamland, where she pictured what their life would be like with the baby: even more perfect. "Oh. Yeah, I'm peachy."
"Girls, there is something that you will need to be aware of, especially you, Buffy, since you'll be the one carrying the child." The two eager women focused all attention to the woman, as Willow cradled a sleeping Jesse on her shoulder. "With your metabolic and adrenal abnormalities, there is a higher risk involved with carrying a child. However, it doesn't make it impossible. Since your disease isn't common, well...practically nonexistent, it is hard to determine how your body will react to the fetus, not to mention the mixed DNA. Over the phone, Rupert assured that you were extremely devoted to one another, and have been through difficult times together already. That's why I have no problem taking the risk, as long as the two of you are positive, and are willing to take on the complications that may arise."
"We're ready." The conviction in Buffy's voice was added with a loving stare at Willow. She would be willing to do anything if it meant they could create a life together. Willow just smiled lovingly in return, and nodded her assent. The blonde turned back to the doctor, squeezing Willow's hand in hers. "Where do we sign?"
"Well, I'm afraid it's not that easy. We still need to make sure both of your eggs are
fertile. That's another important aspect, as I explained earlier before your tests. Your blood types match, which will make the bonding easier but if one or neither eggs are infertile, I'm afraid there's nothing we can do. Those results should be to us..." There was a knock on the door, and an orderly walked in, handing the doctor the test results. Looking in, Dr. Olivia (as the girls called her) smiled as the orderly closed the door behind him. "Well, seems like it is that easy. Are you ready to sign now, girls?" The two girls giggled like schoolgirls, and baby Jesse grunted in sleep against 'Aunt Willow's' shoulder. It was impossible not to embrace from the good news, and Buffy couldn't stop herself from the quick peck on the lips she planted on her wife's upturned lips.
"Just show us where to sign." Willow's enthusiasm was just as much as Buffy's. Sure, there were concerns regarding the health of her wife but it was a moment of excitement. Worry could come later. The doctor just smiled at the lovers. This was why she did what she did: to see two people in love but unable to conceive a baby together, and make their dreams of parenthood a possibility.
"That's not necessary quite yet. We'll implant the bound egg into your body the week after your next period, which according to this chart is another two weeks away. That'll give you plenty of time to inform your cousin?" The doctor smiled, as she watched Willow rub Jesse's back to lull her back to a restful nap. Her natural mother instincts were already starting to show.
"Yes. He's more than ready to take a vacation." Willow chuckled, remembering how her cousin Elm (short for Elmer, the kids teased him for having a cousin named Willow, and the nickname stuck) had charted the next month for a vacation on his work calendar. He was going to love that he had a definite vacation date now.
"That's good. I'll go over the procedure with him beforehand if he wishes." The doctor looked back and forth between the two girls again.
"His part? All he's going to do is..." Buffy was stopped from further commenting when Willow's hand shot from their grasp to over her mouth. The blonde admonished her playfully with her eyes.
"We'll explain everything to him, and if he has further questions, then he'll probably ask during the process." Willow's eyes were wide, very much aware that Buffy was going to go into her tirade of Mark's jerking off into a cup again.
"Well, I'll be glad to answer any questions he may have. Until then, we'll have Chloe set up your appointment for next week, and have you reservation to monitor your vitals in the hospital here as well. That way, if the fetus doesn't take, then we can flush the excess out, and prepare for another conception procedure. Not to worry, though. We've only had to do that twice in four years, and your adrenal abnormality is actually an advantage for that part. We should have little to no problems making your baby. Are there any more questions or concerns that I can help answer at this time?" Seeing both girls shake their heads, Dr. Olivia stood up, and escorted the girls out of the office, and started to prepare for her next meeting.
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"It's good to see you, Willow." Cordelia Chase hugged her old friend, and then hugged Buffy. "Buffy, you look good but I remember you being taller. Must've been the heels."
"Must have." Buffy tried to hold back her urge to roll her eyes at the former cheerleader. She still never would have guessed that the brunette and Willow were friends, especially once Willow confirmed horror stories of what the leggy woman used to be like, and how she still had self esteem problems because of her.
Since they were in LA, the girls decided to make the most of it. The trip wasn't easy, about 3 hours south from Sunnydale, so they agreed to stay with Fred (much to Buffy's scowl). Willow wanted to see her old friends again, so the blonde didn't want to stop her. Besides, it would give her a chance to see Charles again, since he and Fred were still together. Also, it was only for one night, and Willow assured her that there was nothing to be jealous of at all. Still, Buffy couldn't help it. This was Fred, after all: THE Fred, the first love of Willow's life, probably the biggest before she came along. Fred was a sore subject with the blonde, just like Spike was with Willow.
"I can't believe Xander and Anya are parents, and the baby isn't hideous!" Cordelia was still her usual tactless self. "It is lazy like Xander, though. How long has she been asleep?"
"Since we left the doctor's office. She was already out in there before we left, actually." Willow's arms were tired from holding the girl. She missed the days when the chubby little girl fit into those tiny baby carriers. At least now they had a stroller to keep her in while they ate lunch with the former queen of Sunnydale High.
"She is a cutie." After a sip from her mocha, Cordy got excited all of a sudden. "Oh! I forgot to tell that I got a new job!"
"Oh, yeah? The acting business didn't cut it, huh?" Buffy couldn't help but make a comment. If they went to high school together, there would definitely have been some verbal battles between the two former cheerleaders.
"Well...I'll have you know, I am doing good for the world. I'm working at a detective agency as the secretary but since it's a small company that just started, I have more responsibilities than an average secretary. I actually help with cases. You'll see the office, since I have to get the key to our apartment for you two. The boss is kind of broody, and doesn't like daytime that much but he's an okay guy. We 'help the helpless.'" The smile informed Willow that her former schoolmate was actually maturing. She was actually learning to do things for other people, which was kind of shocking. "Actually, we should head that way now. My lunch break is over, and it looks like Buffy here has eaten the restaurant already."
"Hey!" Buffy pushed away the plate from the sandwich she just finished, and followed Cordelia and Willow, deciding to push Jesse to give her wife's arm a rest.
When they arrived at the office of Angel Investigations, the girls saw that Cordy's boss indeed must not like daylight, since the blinds were all down, and there was barely any sunlight at all in the room. Just as Cordelia handed the key to Willow, she noticed that Angel had found his way upstairs... something he rarely did at that time of the day. Then, she noticed the panicked expression from Buffy and Angel, and the concerned look Willow gave her wife, silently asking what the problem was.
"Buffy." Angel stepped forward, careful to keep his distance from the blonde. He was downstairs in his apartment sleeping, and for some strange reason reminisced about a smell he remembered from years ago. Not being able to get the scent from his mind, he went upstairs to ask Cordelia to find the perfume his former girlfriend used to wear but instead of his secretary, he found his secretary, a strange redhead with a baby stroller, and his former girlfriend.
"Angel?" Buffy didn't know what to say. She hadn't seen him in over seven years, and now she had this perfect little life with Willow. It was hard to see him again.
"Angel?" Willow was scared. She had listened to many tales about Angel from Buffy, and it was hard for her to see him for the first time.
"Angel?" The man in questioned turned towards Cordelia, who just shrugged. "What? Everybody said it first."
"Buffy, um... this is awkward." Angel stood back a little, setting his features to brood.
"I know." Buffy was still shocked. Of all places to run into her former beau, this certainly wasn't it. She expected to find him on the nightly news, wreaking havoc, or becoming the scourge of Europe. After their last encounter, this certainly what she'd pictured.
"You... how are you?" He didn't know what to say. He was a completely different person then. It was like he had lost his soul completely, and now he was atoning for the bad things he had done in his life.
"I'm good." She was still trying to wrap her finger around the whole thing.
"You look good." Angel was never one to blush but this was Buffy, the only person he had ever loved. Maybe their chance meeting now, after he was 'cursed' with a soul, as his gypsy friends told him (after some drugs and laughs), there was another chance for them.
"You look...timely." Buffy was closing down, and Willow turned her sad, worried eyes towards her wife, who shook her head to clear her thoughts. "And also good. What are you doing here?"
"Not saving the damsel in distress, that's for sure." Okay, so he'd try humor.
"Oh, you know me...not much with the damseling." Buffy had to stay two steps ahead if she didn't want to break down. Those memories were over but that didn't mean her feelings had changed. Even after the horrible things he did, there would be a place in her heart reserved for Angel. Now, though, it was dwindling more and more each day that she spent with her wife. HER WIFE!!! Buffy turned around, and grinned to reassure her wife that she was okay, more for herself than for Willow. "Angel, this is Willow, and the baby is her friend Xander's. We're babysitting this week."
"Babysitting? I never would have taken you for the motherly type." Angel was dumbfounded. Who was this Willow character? She smelled similar to his ex. Apparently, she was somebody important to the blonde, so he would have to get on her good side if he wanted another shot with Buffy.
"Yeah, well...things change." Buffy moved forward a step, wondering if his tattoo was still on his back. He was wearing a black tanktop but the tendrils from the wings were apparent on his shoulder.
"We should talk."
"We are talking."
"I mean...alone." Seeing Buffy flinch, he tried to reason. "You were right, people and things do change. At least give me the chance to apologize."
"If you need anything, Willow and I will be right here. Trust me, Buffy...he doesn't bite." Cordelia was actually sensitive to the emotions around her, and could feel the tension in the room, and also the pained expression across Willow's face. She wanted answers herself but knew she'd never get them from Mr. Broody. Buffy turned, silently asking permission from Willow, who just nodded her head once. Sighing, the blonde followed her former boyfriend into an adjoining room she assumed was his office.
"What?" She didn't even take a seat.
"Look, Buffy... I did so many things that I'm not proud of, and you're my biggest regret." Angel didn't register how that sounded.
"What? You mean... you never even..." Buffy kept the mantra in her head: 'not going to cry, not going to let him do this to me again.'
"No! I mean...you meant the world to me. You still do. I've only ever loved one person in my life, and that is you. I regret doing all of those things to you. I wasn't me then. It was like I completely lost my soul, and tried to get revenge on anything that made me feel that way." Angel just leaned against his desk, gripping the sides for support. This was harder than he imagined.
"Why didn't you talk to me? I would've helped..."
"Don't you see? You were the one that I loved, so you were the prime target for my madness. That's why I did all of those things..." He decided not to mention those things, since he wanted a good start.
"It still hurts, you know. I mean, I tried...so hard but I just couldn't shake the fact that there was something wrong with me. I always thought that I was just not loveable enough, and that's why you did and said all of those cruel things." Buffy couldn't hold back anymore, and allowed a single tear to fall. Angel was finding it hard to resist the embrace she needed but was holding back nonetheless.
"It wasn't that you weren't loveable enough, Buffy; it was because I loved you too much. I wish I could take it all back, I wish I could say that I'm sorry and have it be enough but I know that it's not. I just need you to believe me when I say that I'm a different person now than I was then, and that I found my soul again, so to speak." Angel just watched her cry. The girl he used to hold, and wipe tears from her face. It wasn't his place anymore.
"I loved you sooo much, Angel." Buffy still controlled herself enough to stop from sobbing. She'd wasted too many tears on this man, and she now had something so much better waiting for her in the lobby. That bit made her smile, and the tears stopped gradually, as Willow's face was plastered in her mind.
"I loved you, and still do, with all of my seemingly unbeating heart." Angel noticed the smile, and that the tears had stopped. He thought that a good sign. "Are you living in LA now?"
"No. I'm just visiting. We had a doctor's appointment. We're staying at a friend's apartment tonight. Actually, we're staying at Cordy's." Buffy looked up at him again, just now noticing the irony of the situation. They had mutual friends all along, and neither knew about it.
"Well, if you can spare a moment, can I buy you a cup of coffee? There's this new place down by their apartment that's just beside the butcher's..." Angel pointed with his thumb hitched towards the direction they were staying.
"No. I'm babysitting, remember?" Buffy avoided eye contact. Angel just now caught something, a new scent on her. She was seeing somebody...a female somebody, and when he searched his aroma databank, he recognized the smell from only ten minutes ago.
"Okay, that's one reason." He crossed his arms, looking at her suspiciously. "What's the other?"
"There is no other." She turned to leave, not understanding what he was hinting at, since she really was babysitting.
"Is it Willow? The girl out there?" When he said that, Buffy turned to look at him. She recognized that they weren't properly introduced. Knowing how jealous and possessive the man could get, she wondered if it would be safe to go into detail about her loving relationship. "You're not telling me something, and I just met her but her scent is strong on you."
"Did anybody ever tell you the whole smelling people thing's a little gross?" She started to walk back into the lobby again.
"Is she your girlfriend?" He followed her, stopping her from exiting the office.
"Is that your business?" She just wanted to protect her wife, since it was already obvious he was going into jealous mode already.
"You in love with her?" He stopped, and took a deep breath. "Okay, maybe I'm outta line here but this is kind of a curveball for me. I mean, we are talking about a woman here."
"It's different. She's different." Buffy got that grin again, and knew she was a goner. She decided a little stab at him would help him back away for a bit. "She has a soul." That worked; it made him stop.
"Oh." He looked up, and rolled his eyes. "Well."
"What?" She really didn't feel like this jealous crap. When they came to LA, her intention was to plan a family with her wife, watch Jesse, and see old friends. She just never expected this particular 'friend.'
"That's great." Then, he mumbled to himself. "Everyone's got a soul now."
"She makes me complete." That just made him scoff.
"You know, I started it. The whole having a soul...before it was the cool new thing." He was once again mumbling but plain for her to hear.
"Oh my God, are you 12?" She couldn't believe this. It was like Junior High with Billy Fordham all over again. At least there was no 'I touch myself' blasting on the stereo this time.
"I'm getting the brush off for Captain Red out there. It doesn't necessarily bring out the champion in me." Defensive mode equals jealous.
"You're not getting the brushoff. Are you gonna go all Dawson on me every time I have a boyfriend, or girlfriend in this case?" She still couldn't believe the time he showed up the year after he left, when she was dating Scott Hope. That was another unpleasant memory.
"A-ha! Girlfriend!" He was prepared to best her, if possible, even though she was still stubborn.
"She's not! But...we are married." Buffy said that last part calmly, hoping not to raise his anger.
"That'll end well." He just walked back, and leaned on his desk again.
"What was the highlight of our relationship? When you broke up with me, or when I stabbed you? I'm well aware of my stellar history of relationships..." She walked over, leaning on the desk with him, and for the twentieth time, wondered if the scar was still on his torso. When their verbal and mental fights turned physical, he had tried to stab her with his knife but luckily, she had diffused him long enough to knock it from his hands. He lunged for her again, and landed on the knife that she still held. He fell back with surprise, and she was emotionally distraught. Those were not her most proud years but now, with Willow, she had something to look forward to, especially with possibility of a baby. "I see fat grandchildren with Willow. That's never happened to me before but that doesn't matter right now." She chuckles lightly, finally relieving some of the tension in the room. "You know, in the midst of all this insanity...with you, with Riley, Spike, everybody else...a couple of things started to make sense. And the guy thing..." She knew this was what was really bothering him. "I always feared there was something wrong with me, you know, because I couldn't make it work. But maybe I wasn't supposed to."
"Because you could die young?" Angel saw the looks she would get just saying Willow's name, and at least she was happy. She looked at him briefly.
"Because...okay, I was cookie dough. I wasn't done baking. I wasn't finished becoming whoever the hell I was gonna turn out to be. I make it through this, and the next thing, and the next thing, and one day, I turn around and realize I'm ready. I'm cookies. And then, you know, if I want someone to eat..." She stopped, eyes wide, as she realized that was a bad metaphor point. "...or enjoy warm, delicious cookie me, then that's fine. Then, I met Willow, and I was done."
"Any thoughts on why it's..." He sighed irritably. "Do I have to go with the cookie analogy?"
"I wasn't thinking that far ahead. That was the point." She smiled forlornly, indicating that she wished things were different. It was obvious now why he asked her for coffee. He just nodded once. "I love Willow. She's my everything. We mix well together. She's the sweet, chocolately chip, and I'm the nut. Can you understand that at all?"
"I get it. I just wish things were different. Don't you ever think that?" It wasn't whiny, jealous Angel now. He was broody again; he was the one, after all, that messed his chances up to begin with, and now he wouldn't take her away from Willow. Seeing her happy, that's all he could ever want. At least now, he got the chance to know whether she was or not. He'd often debated about tracking her down (after all, he did run a detective agency) but thought better of it. She would've been angrier had they met that way. After several seconds, she just remained silent, not answering the question. He nodded, and started to walk out the door. She called after him to stop him.
"Angel." She successfully stopped him, and he turned to look at her. "I do...sometimes think about it."
"Sometimes is something." He smiled, and began walking back to the lobby.
"It can never happen, though." He nodded again, and she followed him out, greeting her very distressed wife. Obviously, she and Cordelia had been in heavy conversation as well. Luckily, Jesse was still out cold. The little girl really was like Xander, practically a log.
"It's nice to meet you, Willow." Angel smiled politely, and shook her hand. She took it tentatively, and narrowed her eyes in suspicion. Getting the nod from Buffy, she shook it, and smiled her own polite smile. She would shake his hand but that didn't mean she'd have to like it. This man hurt her Buffy but at least she was still HER Buffy.
"Nice to meet you, too...uh, Angel." She let go of his hand, and she started to roll the stroller towards the door. She wanted out of there fast.
"Look, if you ever want to chat, you know where to find me. I'm not getting any older." Angel put his attention on Buffy again, and she just nodded. Walking towards the door, she stopped suddenly, and turned around, deciding that she would hug him for closure. It worked, and the two embraced one last time: one a happily married woman, and the other a changed man. Leaving the door, she joined Willow on the street. They didn't talk the whole ride over to Fred's.
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A/N: So?? Wanna bitchslap me now? Muahahaha!!!!