Leaving Her
by Salix
Moving On
[reviews]
An entire year has come and gone since Buffy had walked out on Willow, taking their daughter with her. She has been living in the small apartment in the small town ever since. They've grown to think of it as home, just not as good as what they had when they lived in Sunnydale. It took Buffy six months, nine days, fourteen hours, twenty-three minutes and forty-seven seconds to get over Willow. Well, she's over her to the point where she can live without her, and laugh and smile without feeling guilty. It took her another four months to get to the point where she started to just think about dating again. She wasn't so sure though, it just seemed so soon. They'd been together for so many years, shouldn't it take her two or three years to get over this?
Emily is also doing better but not by much. She talks to Willow everyday. The redhead pays for the long distance phone calls so that they can talk for as long as they want. In the first couple of months it was how much they missed each other, and then it started to become how much they miss each other plus what's going on in their daily lives. Emily is dating a guy named Mike. He's pretty new to the Hollow as the town is sometimes called. He's been living here for five months, they've been dating for three. It's getting pretty serious, and Buffy is getting pretty worried.
The two Summers girls finally fit in, in this tiny town. They've been accepted by the rest of the people and get along with most of them. There are a couple moms who have a problem with her sexuality saying that they don't want her 'corrupting' their children, but she just ignores them. One thing that she has noticed about Stars Hollow is that there is no evil. Everywhere she's gone in the town she can't sense a vampire or demon for miles. She wants to do some research on it, but she hasn't talked to Giles or Xander in so long. They've talked every once in a while, a call on Thanksgiving and Christmas, and birthdays and stuff, but for the most part they don't talk much, mostly because the bill would be too high.
Willow did come out to visit that last Christmas. Emily had been so happy she was in tears almost the entire time. And then she took her redheaded mom around the town and practically paraded her around for all to see. They did plenty of things together, like shopping at the Hartford mall, and the little Stars Hollow bookstore. She took her to Luke's and introduced her to the best coffee on the East coast. But mostly they stayed at the apartment and watched T.V. while enjoying some very missed mother-daughter snuggles.
Willow apologized at least a million times for the way she had ignored both of them, the way she had put her work first. Emily was very quick to forgive but Buffy wouldn't. She told her that 'it's ok, it's in the past,' but she never said the words 'I forgive you,' which is what Willow had wanted to hear. She had been hoping to show up in the little town and sweep Buffy off of her feet, even picking her up and spinning a couple of times like the guy does to the girl in those cheesy romantic movies, but that never happened. All she got was a 'hello, how are you?' and that was pretty much it. They didn't talk much while Willow was there. Buffy had told her that she was there to spend time with their daughter not with her. She wouldn't even let Willow stay at the apartment, instead she got her a room at the Inn, and she paid for half of it.
They were civil to each other and even had dinner together one night. It was the night before Willow was going to fly back to Sunnydale. Buffy had finally agreed to go out with her, but it was just dinner, it was in no way a date. Although it was in a nice little romantic restaurant where there were a lot of couples out on dates, but they weren't on a date. Willow had explained a few things to Buffy while they were out. The first thing she did was apologize for treating her so badly.
Then she told Buffy about what was going on in her life now. She had a better job with a different company. It was a high income, but she only worked three days a week, eight hours a day. She said that she was still living in the house, and everything was pretty much the way it was when Buffy had left, minus Buffy and Emily's stuff and half the kitchen ware.
Then she went on to explain that she was still single. She was waiting for Buffy to come back to her. She was a little hurt, ok, a lot hurt, when she saw that Buffy had taken off her wedding rings. She asked the blonde if she would come back with her. That she would stay a couple of extra days to help them pack and then they could all fly back to Sunnydale together. There was a long pause from the blonde. She didn't know how to answer that question right away. So she thought about it for a few minutes and then came to a very tough decision. She took Willow by the hand and she looked into her eyes, tears brimming Buffy's hazel ones as she looked deeply into the green orbs.
"Willow, I still love you. A part of me will always love you, but I just can't go back with you. After everything you put us through, how you ignored me and the constant fighting, I just can't see how we could make it work a second time. I'm really sorry, but I just can't. I have a life here now. This is where I belong now. You can come visit Emily whenever you want, but we can't be together. I'm sorry Willow, I really am." And then she leaned forward and planted a sweet and soft goodbye kiss on Willow's lips. When she pulled back they were both crying. Buffy stood up and let go of Willow's hand and she pulled some money out of her purse and placed it on the table before she rushed out of the restaurant in tears.
That was eleven months ago, she's only seen Willow a couple of times since then. On Emily's birthday and then again when Willow came for a surprise visit. They never stayed in the same room alone for more then a few minutes, and Buffy would drown herself in her work every the redhead would come to the town. Whenever she saw Willow at the Inn things were tense but she stayed professional about it. She didn't want to cause a scene in her place of business.
But the other workers could feel the tension coming off of her whenever the redhead would come into town and a couple of them, mostly Lorelai and Sookie, would question her about it, but she would just shrug it off, saying that she was fine just a little stressed. She never told them that it was the beautiful redhead who had broken her heart so badly. She had never told them what Willow looks like or acts like. She kept it a total mystery because she didn't want things to get tense between the other workers and Willow. She wanted the redhead's stay to be at least somewhat enjoyable, but Buffy could tell that the redhead was still waiting for her and she wondered if Willow would always be waiting for her.
Buffy walked out from the kitchen and over to the computer. She needed to check up on a room, the person staying in it had complained about the heat not working and she wanted to look up their name before she called up there to see if it had been fixed. She typed in the room number into the computer and then the information came up. That name sounded so damn familiar to her, but she couldn't place it for the life of her. She thought about it for a few minutes but it just didn't come to her. So she asked Michel if he would call up and check instead, she didn't want to talk to them just in case they recognized her before she recognized them.
That kept nagging at her all day long. She knew that she had heard that name somewhere before but she couldn't remember where she had heard it from, and so it was going to continue to bother her until she figured it out. The day went by fairly slow. No big emergencies or annoyances. The one thing that Buffy found that she didn't really like about the job was the people. Not all of them, just the ones that seem to complain about every single little thing. The ones that are never satisfied with what you do. But that is the only downer. Other then that she loves everything about her job, and the fact that she works with really nice people who respect her and take her seriously.
When she got off of work she went straight to Luke's. She needed a little pick-me-up, which meant a very hot cup of coffee. She'd never been addicted to the stuff this badly before but Luke's is the best coffee she's ever had so she doesn't really mind. She sat at the counter and exchanged hellos with the man and then they started to talk about their day. She and Luke get along pretty well and they'll have the occasional conversation but they don't talk all of the time. Mostly because they don't really have a lot in common.
As she was waiting for her coffee she heard the front door open and close, the little bell announced their presence. She looked over when the person sat a couple of bar stools down from her, and her eyes grew wide. She knew she had recognized that name, and now the person was sitting a couple of seats down from her, looking a menu, completely oblivious to Buffy sitting there, staring at her. She adverted her eyes before she got caught staring and took a couple of sips of her coffee. She had to think of someway to get the woman's attention and not look like an idiot.
"Oh my God, Buffy Summers, is that you?" she heard the woman ask. Ok, or maybe she wouldn't need to come up with a plan. She looked up from staring into her coffee cup and over at the woman. She still looked great, maybe even a little thinner then she used to be. But other then that she was still the same, same pretty hair, same pretty eyes, same soft looking skin. Yep, this was definitely her alright.
"Tara?" she asked and the woman nodded her head. She got up and sat down next to Buffy. The two squealed and then enveloped each other in a friendly hug. They smiled widely and then Luke decided at that moment to interrupt and ask Tara what she wanted. She looked over at Buffy for help, this being her first time here she doesn't know what's good. So Buffy answered two hamburgers with everything and Luke was off to fix the order. Then Buffy looked back over at Tara the happy grin of seeing an old friend still plastered on her face.
"So, what have you been up to? God, it's been so long," Buffy said and took a sip of her coffee. She and Tara had been friends in college. They started a friendship after Buffy had saved her one night from the Gentlemen. They were good friends but not too close. Willow got really, really jealous of the other witch so Buffy made sure to keep her time with Tara limited. She will admit, if only to herself, that she is attracted to the other woman. Who wouldn't be? She just assumed that Willow had picked up on that attraction and was afraid of losing Buffy. That was back when they said they would be together forever and ever.
"Well, I was an English teacher for a while at a school in Northern California, but because the school was going through some money troubles they had to lay off a couple of the teachers, me being one of them. So I got a job at this little magazine, and I guess I was doing something right because they promoted me a couple of times. That's why I'm here. I'm doing an article on the Independence Inn. Nothing too big though. I just have to write about the food, the service, stuff like that." She paused when Luke came up and gave them their food. She thanked him and then he started to go bus the tables.
"I heard about what happened, between you and Will. I ran into her a couple months ago when I went back to Sunnydale. Sorry for what happened," she said and took a bite of her food. She looked over at Buffy with sad eyes and the slayer slightly shook her head from side to side. She finished chewing and then swallowed before she replied to that.
"Thanks, but it's not your fault, not need to apologize," she said, keeping her town lighthearted. But it was a little difficult. The subject of Willow was still a very sore one and she didn't like to talk about it. She looked into the questioning eyes of the brown haired witch and thought she knew what was coming, so she decided to just get it over with now. "She was working way too much. She completely ignored me, Emily. You remember my daughter Emily?" She watched as Tara thought about it for a few seconds and then nodded her head. Buffy has gotten into the habit of saying 'my daughter' instead of 'our daughter'. She still thinks that Emily is both hers and Willow's, but without Willow around it's just easier to say 'my'.
"Yeah. I think I met her once or twice. She was just the cutest thing. Picked up on your sarcasm right away." She smiled a teasing smile and Buffy laughed a little. The conversation went on for a while. It stayed pretty light, avoiding really heavy topics that neither of them wanted to know. Until the question of their dating status was asked by Tara, they both answered single, and they both couldn't help but feel that little spark of attraction that they had felt back in college. Then they decided to leave. Tara didn't have a car, and tried to convince Buffy that she could just walk back to the Inn, but Buffy insisted. She pulled up in front of the Inn, and they sat there for a couple of minutes, neither wanting to leave the other. There was definitely something between them, but would it develop into anything?
"So, I guess I'll see you later then," Tara said as she unbuckled the seatbelt. Buffy felt like she should say something, anything to get the other woman to stay, but she didn't know what. The topic of work had come up again during their conversation and Tara knows that Buffy works there, and she was looking forward to running into her. Buffy watched with sad eyes as Tara opened the door and prepared to step out of the sky blue Toyota Camery, but then she stopped, and looked over at Buffy with some apprehension in her eyes. And then before Buffy really knew what was happening, Tara's soft lips were pressed up against hers, and it took her a few seconds to get over the shock before she kissed back. And then they pulled away and they both smiled.
"Bye Buffy," she said and got out of the car. Buffy said a 'goodbye', still a little dazed from the kiss. She watched the woman walk into the front doors of the Inn and then a large Cheshire Cat grin broke out on her face. She threw the car into drive and headed for home, a little faster then she normally would. She took to the stairs, two at a time, wanting to tell her daughter about the arrival of the old friend. But she couldn't find her anywhere. She instead found a note taped to her bedroom door. Mom, you were late so I found someone who would feed me. I'm at Rory's, I'll be back by nine. Love your one and only, Em.
Buffy could tell by the note, not just the words but how dark and deep the pen marks were, that Emily was in a bad mood about something. She wondered if her daughter was ok. For the last month or so she's been quiet, keeping to herself, and Buffy just passed it off as a phase. She thought that Emily was just going through some weird 'I'm seventeen I need to be more independent' type of thing. She shrugged it off, deciding that she would talk to her about it later, and then she tossed the note away and changed into some more comfortable clothes. She decided to go for a little walk. She was so glad that she had finally met someone, even if they would only be in town for a couple of days, a lot can happen in a couple of days.
She ended up at the park, and sat down on a bench, enjoying the cool night air. It had taken her and Emily a while to get used to the cold of the town. Being in California for so long they had gotten used to the sun shining warmly on them, but here, it had seemed like it was always cold even if the sun was out. Things were a lot more expensive too. The apartment she's renting now is four hundred dollars a month, whereas in Sunnydale it would probably only be about two hundred, maybe two fifty. Things on the East coast were just a lot more expensive, that took some getting used to as well. They weren't as bad as when they lived in Rome, things got a little tight when it came to the money, but they finally got used to the price of things.
Buffy was walking down the sidewalk. She figured that she'd been at the park long enough, and she wanted to get home before Emily did. She noticed lately that if she got home late without calling then Emily got really mad at her, and a couple of times the teen accused her of fooling around with someone instead of being home when she was supposed to be. Buffy had no idea where the hell that came from, but she just tried to ignore it, and explained that sometimes she's just too busy to pick up a phone and call home.
She stopped in the middle of the sidewalk and looked over at the store that was still open, most of them had closed by now, it was already eight-thirty. Buffy realized that she had never been in that store before. Probably to stop herself from buying anything. She thought that maybe going in there just to look around wouldn't hurt anything. It's not like she's a compulsive buyer or anything, at least that's what she likes to tell herself. With a small smile she walked into the store, deciding that maybe it would be a good idea to pick some things out. Emily would be so surprised.
~~~
The teen walked into the apartment at nine-fifteen. The door was unlocked so either her mom was home or they'd been broken into. She knew it was the first one, Stars Hollow has a zero percent crime rate, or at least it seemed like it. She closed and locked the door and made her way into her bedroom. She walked down the hall that held the two bedrooms, she glanced into her mom's room, the door had been left open and the light was on. She walked a couple of steps passed the room before what she saw registered in her mind and she stopped and walked into the bedroom.
"What the hell is that?" she asked and pointed to the little fuzzy thing running around on her mom's bed. She looked around her moms room and saw all of the different things that she had purchased that night when she walked into that store. The litter box, the litter, the toys, the food, the food and water bowls, even a little pink collar with little fake diamonds. After years of protesting about getting a cat, saying that they're lazy animals who do nothing but sleep, her mom had finally went out and got a cat. She was surprised, she had to admit.
"It's a kitten. Isn't she cute?" she asked and then picked up the cat and gave it a little kiss on the nose and proceeded to talk baby talk to it. "Yes she is, she's just the cutest little thing in the world." Emily rolled her eyes, and pretended not to care. She was excited that they finally had a pet, she's been wanting one for years, but lately she's been shutting herself off emotionally speaking. They've been in Stars Hollow for way too long, she just wants to go home to Sunnydale, not that she'll tell her moms that. Nope, because that would involve opening up and talking about her feelings.
"This one's mine," she heard her mom say, snapping her out of her little daze. She put the little white with gray kitten down and picked up a little brown one. It had a brown body, the head was slightly darker, the nose was pink, the feet where black but the tips of the toes were white, it's eyes were a bright blue. Emily had to control herself from squealing or any of that other girly stuff. "This one is yours. They're both girls and they're both spayed. Thought it would be easier if we just got girls, the lady at the store told me that girls are more affectionate." She took the offered kitten and held it up so she could look into its eyes. Still acting like it was no big deal, she held the little kitten in her arms, and started to chew on her lip ring, she does that when she's deep in thought.
"Thanks. I can't believe you got us cats. You've been so anti-pet for years, what happened to put you in a good enough mood to suddenly get two?" she asked and sat down on the bed. She set the little kitten down and watched as the two started to play. She noticed that hers was the more aggressive of the two, also the better fighter. She smiled as her cat tackled her moms and pinned it down, over and over again. She already had a name picked out; Bella. Short for Bellatrix which is Latin for warrior.
"Well, it's funny that you ask. See I was at the diner, having some post-work coffee, and I ran into somebody. Do you remember a woman named Tara Maclay?" she asked and Emily thought about it. She knew the name was familiar she just didn't know from where. It took her five minutes to finally place the name and she felt a sense of accomplishment for doing so. The name didn't bring up any good memories, she remembers the fight that her moms had because of the young woman.
"Oh! She's the girl that you and mom got in that fight about. Mom said something about you having a crush on her and you spent twenty minutes convincing her that she's the only one for you." She picked up her cat and started to pet it. She could tell that her mom got uncomfortable after she said that. Emily knows that she's still not completely over her redheaded mom, which is good. It'll be a lot easier to convince her to move back to Sunnydale if she ever starts dating again.
"Uh, yeah, that's her. Well, I ran into her at the diner. Apparently she works for some magazine and she's doing a review on the Inn. We had dinner at Luke's and then when I dropped her off at the Inn, she went to get out but then she stopped and she turned back around and she kissed me. So, what do you think, should I ask you out?" she asked and got a little excited. She's hasn't dated in a long time, and it felt good to finally reach the point where she's willing to try.
Emily's face fell just a little. She could tell that her mom really did want her opinion, but her opinion was 'hell no, let's go back to Sunnydale and you and mom can get back together and be happy again'. She wanted to hell at her mom for even thinking about dating someone else. She wanted to scream and rant and punch the wall to get the anger out. But she didn't say anything, at least not really anything that would be considered her opinion.
"Do what you want, whatever makes you happy, right?" she said, in a very less then happy voice. She got up from the bed and walked into her room, taking the cat with her. She closed the door and slid the dresser in front of it so her mom wouldn't be able to open it. She was upset, to say the least. She needed to get out of here, and now before she did something stupid. So she moved the dresser from the door and put it back where it belongs and then set the little kitten outside of her door so it wouldn't be locked in there all night.
She turned on her stereo, popped in a CD and put it on repeat, and then turned the volume up so her mom would be able to hear it if she stood outside the door. She flipped off her light and then climbed out the window. She climbed down the fire escape and started to run as fast as she could. She needed to get as far away from her mom as possible, because she didn't want the blonde to see the tears that were threatening to spill over.
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So, were you surprised or was it easy to guess that I was going to go with Tara? I was originally going to use Kennedy, until I remembered that I'm an official member of the 'i hate kennedy club'. Now, before you start yelling at me for hooking Buffy up with Tara, this is going to end as a Buffy/Willow fic, so keep that in mind before you try to stone me to death.