Leaving Her
by Salix
Wanna Forget
[reviews]
Sorry I haven't update in a while but things around here have been pretty stressful and very busy. I'll try to post some more as soon as I can, although I'm not sure when that'll be, patience, just have lots and lots of patience.
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Buffy was downstairs in the kitchen, making breakfast. Last night was amazing, no other word described it. Ok so maybe, wonderful, fantastic, astounding and marvelous will work as well. She smiled as she thought of all the things she and Willow had done. Most of them were pretty naughty, but her favorite parts were the ones in between the naughty stuff. When Buffy would just hold Willow in her arms while they caught their breath. She would never tire of just holding the beautiful redhead, everything else was just a great bonus. A spectacular, toe curling, 'oh my God don't stop!' type of bonus. She couldn't help but glow as she placed the pancake onto the plate and then added some syrup. The food that was already on the plate consisted of: a slice of toast with butter and strawberry jam, scrambled eggs, and bacon.
She put the plate on the tray and then poured two glasses of milk, and placed them on the tray as well. She then picked it up and headed for the stairs. She planned on surprising her exhausted lover with breakfast in bed, and then she planned on staying in bed all day since the kid was feeling better she could go downstairs to fetch herself some juice if she wanted it. She had already made Emily some breakfast, it was waiting for her at the center island. On her way towards her bedroom she stopped and lightly kicked Emily's door with the heel of her foot.
"Emily, get up, your breakfast is downstairs and getting cold!" she said loudly before she moved on and went into her bedroom. Willow was still sleeping, surprisingly, and she slowly made her way over to the bed. She placed the tray down on the bedside table and then shut the door. She took off her robe and crawled under the covers. She laid on her side, held her head up with her hand and she watched Willow sleep for a few minutes. Then she decided it was time for her to wake up, because Buffy was getting a little cold and she wanted to be held. That, and she didn't want Willow's breakfast to be wasted, the redhead refuses to eat cold eggs.
"Willow," she said in a singsong voice and scooted closer to her. She started to stroke Willow's hair and the redhead started to move around, but then she stopped and remained asleep. "Honey, it's time to wake up." She leaned down and placed a soft kiss on Willow's lips, but she just groaned and rolled over onto her other side, facing away from Buffy. 'Now I know where Emily gets it from,' she thought and she scooted a little closer. She wrapped her arms around the redhead and started to kiss the back of her neck. She felt Willow start to move around and she started to lightly stroke the soft skin of Willow's flat stomach.
"Mmmm, baby, I'm sleepy. Later, ok?" she heard Willow mumble and she smiled against the back of her neck. She started to nibble at Willow's ear and got a little shiver for her efforts. She waited for the redhead to wake up a little more and then she stopped her touching and moved away from her a little. She smiled when she heard Willow groan in protest and then lean against Buffy. "Ok, I'm up." She still sounded tired as she sat up in the bed and started to rub the sleep out of her eyes. Buffy smiled as she watched her lover, Willow is always really cute first thing in the morning. The blonde sat up and wrapped her arms around the redhead and started to kiss the pale flesh of her lover's neck.
"Someone's feeling frisky. Oh! Breakfast. Ah, you made me breakfast in bed. That's so sweet. Thank you," she said and kissed Buffy's lips. She turned in the warm embrace and she picked up the breakfast tray and placed it in her lap. She picked up the fork and took a small bite of the eggs. 'Just how I like 'em,' she thought and then stabbed another small piece and held it out for Buffy to take. The blonde giggled and took the offered food. They continued to do that until all of the food was gone. Willow would take a bite and then feed Buffy a bite. It was sweet and reminded them of their youth, when they used to feed each other ice cream back in high school and in college. 'But college wasn't that long ago. We're not old, just aged,' Buffy thought and she started to kiss Willow's neck. But then Willow pulled away and Buffy tensed up.
"I wanna check on Emily, make sure she's doing ok. We got pretty...um...loud last night," she said with a blush that Buffy thought was adorable. "I'll be right back." She gave Buffy a quick kiss on the cheek before she put the tray back on the side table and then got out of bed. She knew that Buffy was watching her naked form walk across the room so she put an extra sway to her hips as she walked over to the closet and pulled out a robe. She slipped into it and tied the sash. She turned back and looked at Buffy and smiled before she winked and then left the room.
Willow lightly knocked on the bedroom door. She knew from experience that if Emily was asleep then she wouldn't wake up from the knock. That kid sleeps better then the dead. The redhead slowly opened the door and peeked into the room. She saw the rumpled blankets and the large bulge in the middle of the bed. She frowned when she thought that the bulge looked bigger then normal. She became suspicious, and concerned, a little angry as well. She walked up to the bed and pulled back to the covers, thinking the worst, and she sighed a breath of relief when she saw that it was only Nikki lying next to Emily. The girls were wrapped around each other very tightly, and Willow smiled at the little scene. Even if Nikki is a bad influence, she can't help but be glad that the two teens are friends. They're like sisters, no doubt about it.
"Girls," she said and nudged Emily's shoulder. She groaned and moved around a little bit. "Emily, Nikki, get up. Breakfast is waiting for you downstairs." Still nothing. Willow rolled her eyes and walked over to the window. She pulled back the curtains and watched as the morning sun settled on the two sleeping teens. They moved around some more, mostly to grab the comforter and pull it over their heads. She chuckled and then she opened the window, thinking that maybe the cool morning air would wake them up.
She started to pick up their discarded clothes and when she picked up Emily's jacket some items fell out of the inside pocket. She thought that it was a little strange that a stake, a bottle of holy water, and a crucifix necklace would be inside the pocket. Where did she get this stuff anyway? Buffy locked up all of their slayer and magic stuff in the attic years ago. She started to empty out the rest of the pockets and she found a flask. She twisted of the cap and took a little whiff. 'Yep, definitely vodka,' she thought. She dropped the stuff to the floor and then went back over to the bed. She pulled the blanket off of the sleeping girls and threw it to the floor. They groaned in protest and started to move around a little. She thought she heard one of them say 'what the hell?' but she ignored that.
"Emily, what is all of this stuff? What did you two do last night?" she asked sounding mad. She knew that if Buffy and Emily ever came back to Sunnydale then Emily would probably sneak out the first couple of nights to go do stuff with Nikki, but she never thought that the 'stuff' would involve a vampire. She wasn't answered by the sleepy girl, instead all she got a was a 'go away I'm tired.' So she reached out and grabbed onto Emily's arm and pulled her off of the bed, letting her fall roughly to the floor. She landed on her ass but she still rubbed her head as if that were the body part that had suffered some injury.
"What the hell is your problem?" she asked loudly and looked up at Willow. She didn't try to stand because she was still too tired. Out of the corner of her eye, Willow saw Nikki sit up to watch them but she ignored her. The only person she was focusing on right now was Emily. She tried to keep her anger at bay but it was kind of hard. A couple of days ago she finds out that her daughter had let a vampire feed from her and now she finds things in her daughter's room that would help fight off a vampire.
"What did you two do last night? Why do you have a stake and holly water in your jacket? What is going on with you?" she asked and Emily stood up. She took a defensive posture. Willow tried not to roll her eyes at the defiance that her daughter was showing. It reminded her a lot of Dawn when she was this age. But an even scarier thought was that it also reminded Willow of Faith and the last thing she wants is her daughter to turn out to be a watered down version of the once troubled slayer.
"We went to the Bronze last night. That place usually has a couple of vampires stalking around so we took some protection. Why are you freaking out on me?" she asked and decided that it was too early to act defiant and sat down on her bed. Her head was pounding and right now she just wanted to go back to sleep. But it looked like she wasn't going to be getting to do that any time soon. Willow looked so mad that Emily wouldn't be surprised it smoke started to come out of her ears. Even though the hellmouth is closed, you still never know what's going to happen.
"I'm freaking out because I just found out that my daughter let a vampire drink from her, and probably had sex with her as well, and then I find all of this stuff that could make a vampire submit to you." Emily just shook her head. Tears welled up in her eyes but she blinked them away. Was she ever going to be able to forget about that? Will the guilt of her actions ever get any better or will she feel dirty forever?
"You what?" she heard Nikki ask, sounding very out of breath. Emily had forgotten that she was there. She looked up at Willow with anger in her eyes, and this look like 'see what you did?' Emily just stared down at her hands. She couldn't look at Nikki, not right now. She knew that her friend was going to freak out, that's why she kept it a secret. She didn't want Nikki to find out because she didn't want her friend to hate her. And then Willow had to mess everything up. 'Don't blame her, it's your fault,' she told herself. "Why didn't you tell me? When did that happen? Oh my God. I need to get out of here." Nikki said and jumped off of the bed. She grabbed her clothes and then started to walk out of the room. "I'll bring your pajamas back later." And then she closed the bedroom door and left the house.
Willow just stood there for a few minutes, looking down at her daughter. The guilt that was coming off of her made Willow want to cry, to hug her, to tell her that everything would be ok. But she didn't. She just stood there, not really knowing what to do. She sat down on the bed next to the teen, about a foot away from her. She wasn't sure if her daughter would want to be touched right now. She was starting to regret ever coming into the room in the first place. She and Buffy were going to talk to Emily about the scars, but they were going to be calm about it, and not act all emotional and confront her, the way that Willow just did.
"Listen, I'm sorry I got mad, and I'm sorry I yelled that in front of Nikki. Just go back to sleep, or your mom made you breakfast if you want that. We need to sit down and talk about this later, ok?" she asked and Emily just nodded her head. Willow reached over and hugged her daughter, but the hug wasn't returned. She placed a soft kiss against the side of Emily's head and watched as the teen laid back down on the bed and faced away from her. Willow picked the blanket up off of the ground and covered her up with it, and then she went back into her own bedroom. She saw that it was empty and she thought that maybe Buffy was in the bathroom, or downstairs or something. With the mood for intimacy ruined she got dressed and headed downstairs.
She went into the kitchen and saw that Buffy had already made some coffee. She poured herself a mug full, and then started to look for her lover. She wasn't anywhere downstairs, and Willow ever checked upstairs again, but she didn't find her. So she went back downstairs and out in the front yard, but still no Buffy. Then she went back into the house and out to the backyard.
She saw Buffy, in a bathrobe and a pair of Willow's slippers, sitting at the wooden bench, sipping from a coffee mug and looking around the backyard. She had to admit, she missed this place a whole hell of a lot. Willow walked over and sat down next to the blonde. She smiled when Buffy wrapped an arm around her and she leaned against the blonde, loving the warmth she felt. But then her mood turned grim and she frowned as she looked into her mug.
"I think I just fucked up royally," she said and felt Buffy tense up a little bit. She didn't wait for the blonde to ask any questions, she just wanted to get this over with. "I found some stuff in Emily's jacket when I was cleaning up her room. A stake, and a bottle of holy, and a crucifix necklace." She frowned when she thought about it and where it had originally come from. Emily definitely had to have gone through some boxes in the attic or something to have found that. Buffy had put that necklace away a long time ago, so Emily must have found it snooping around or something and decided to take it.
"I woke her up and asked her what she and Nikki did last night, Nikki was in the room with her by the way. I know they went out last night, 'cause come on those two are almost inseparable. And I asked why Emily had that stuff, and she told me it was because they went to the Bronze and there's usually a vampire or two hanging around and she wanted to be protected just in case. And she asked why I was freaking out on her, and I blurted out that it was because I just found out that she let a vampire drink from her and God only knows what else. I said all of that right in front of Nikki and apparently Emily didn't want Nikki to know. And then Nikki left, all pissed off and Emily is all upset now. God, Buffy what's wrong with me? I mean, I finally get you two back and then I just go and mess things up. There has to be something wrong me with, a normal person wouldn't do that." She felt Buffy tighten her hold on her. She heard the blonde's coffee mug being set down on an empty part of the bench and she did the same. She turned in Buffy's embrace, allowing her better access to the warmth of the other body. Buffy started to slowly rub Willow's back, and she placed a soft kiss on the side of her head.
"There's nothing wrong with you, Will. You were just worried about her, that's all. And I don't care how much she missed Nikki, she's not going to start sneaking out again. But we'll talk to her later, ok? I want to know what was going on just as badly as you do. I can't believe all of that was going on and I didn't even notice," she said and then Willow sat up and looked into the hazel eyes that she loved so much. She knew what Buffy was doing, had a good idea what she was thinking. She leaned down and placed a small kiss on the soft lips and then looked into her eyes again.
"It's not your fault. You're not a bad parent, so don't blame yourself. You can't know everything, and you can't be everywhere. It could be a lot worst. She could be pregnant or have a drug problem or something," Willow said and then kissed Buffy again. Willow deepened the kiss and started to run her hands up and down the length of Buffy's sides. She was about to straddle the blonde, to see if she was feeling frisky enough to have a little quickly right there on the bench like they had back when they were in college and they couldn't have one in the house because Joyce and Dawn were in there. But they were interrupted when someone in front of them coughed to get their attention. They groaned, both unpleased by the intrusion, and they pulled apart and smiled when they saw a blushing Xander.
"Just thought I'd stop by and see how you two crazy kids were doing," he explained and stayed where he was. "I brought donuts." He held out the pink box and Buffy gladly took it and started opened it up. She snatched up a jelly filled one and then offered the box to Willow but she turned it down and then Buffy offered one for Xander but he refused as well, saying that Anya had fixed a very filling breakfast. "So, how's Emily doing? She's not all traumatized after what happened is she? You two have been out of commission for so long she hasn't had as many near death experiences as the rest of us." Buffy frowned and then looked up towards the bedroom window. She saw Emily looking down at them, tears running out of her eyes and she quickly closed the curtains and a few seconds later they could hear her music blasting.
"And I hope she never will," Buffy said and looked over at Willow. They gave each other a worried look and then glanced up at the window again. They sat up a little straighter and scooted over to make more room for Xander and he sat down next to them. Buffy took another sip of her coffee, shivering at the disgusting coldness. "She seems to be doing ok. She hasn't talked about it, but she hasn't been acting any different. At least not in front of us." Buffy's frown deepened and she looked into her mug, zoning out a little bit as she thought about the conversation that they were going to have later on. She felt Willow's hand rubbing on her back, trying to comfort her, but it just wasn't working.
"Why? Did something happen? Do you want me to go up and talk to her? I'm sure you guys got it covered, but most of the time teenagers won't talk about certain things in front of their parents. Come on, we were teenagers not so long ago, I'm sure you guys remember." He smiled and they all noticed when the music got a little louder. Buffy stood up, followed by Willow and Xander and they made their way towards the house. Neither of them answered his question and they were all silent as they walked up the steps that lead to the second floor of the house, and they stood outside the teenager's bedroom door. Buffy tried to open it, but it was locked. She knew that yelling would do no good since she could barely hear herself think. She used a little of her slayer strength to force the door open and she saw Emily lying on her bed, staring up at the ceiling, the bedside table drawer was open, and the teen seemed to be zoning out big time.
Willow covered her ears and walked over to the dresser where the stereo was. She turned it off and was relieved that the loud music had died. There was a ringing in her ears and she couldn't really hear anything. She shook it off though and tried to force her hearing to get better. She and Buffy walked up to the bed, Emily had rolled over onto her side, facing away from them. Buffy reached down and gently rolled her over onto her back, and she seemed to be fighting to keep her eyelids open. They noticed that she was having some trouble moving, and she couldn't control her movements very well. They didn't smell any alcohol so they knew she wasn't drunk, but what the hell was going on?
"Get out, I'm sleepy," they heard her mumble. Her words were slurred a little bit. She closed her eyes and drifted off a little, but then she caught herself before falling asleep. She forced her eyes opened and tried to focus on her parents, but they could tell that she was having trouble doing that too. "Mom said I could sleep, I wanna go to sleep. I wanna forget." She closed her eyes and started to drift again. Buffy sat down next to the bed, fear was running through her body as she watched her daughter slip away from her. She patted Emily on the cheek startling her a little bit. She tried to open her eyes but it was becoming increasingly difficult.
"What do you wanna forget?" she asked and gently used her thumb to hold up one of Emily's eyelids. The girl tried to swipe her hand away but she was so uncoordinated that she missed and just let her arm slump down, as if it weighed too much to lift. "Baby, what do you wanna forget?" She couldn't help the tears that started to form in her hazel eyes. This was almost as scary as watching Spike hold that knife to her throat. Buffy thought she was going to loose her then, and she thought that maybe she would loose her now, only this time she doesn't know what to do to make things better.
"I'm dirty," she heard her daughter whisper so faintly that only her slayer hearing detected it. She watched as Emily fully relaxed, unconsciousness claiming her as its own. Buffy tried shaking her, and calling out her name but it wasn't working, and she had to stop or else her emotions would get the better of her and she might accidentally hurt Emily with her slayer strength. Buffy took a step back, she could feel herself about to become very overwhelmed and if she didn't try to calm down now she might do something she'll regret later. She watched as Willow sat down on the bed and frantically tried to wake the teen, but it was no use.
"Guys, look at this," they heard Xander say. Buffy turned around to face him and she saw that he was holding a plastic, orange pill bottle in her hand. It still had the prescription label on it. She stepped forward and swiped the bottle out of his hand. It was almost empty, and Buffy wondered how many of the pills she had taken. She read the label, the name the bottle was prescribed to was scratched out but the name of the drug was still in tact. Where the hell did Emily get a bottle of Vicodin? Buffy allowed Willow to take the bottle from her and the redhead looked it over for a few minutes. When she dropped the bottle to the floor, spilling the ten or so white pills onto the dark carpet, they instantly went to work. Xander picked up the passed out teen and Willow ran down stairs. Buffy ran into the bedroom and got dressed before she ran outside to the car and they made their way to the hospital.