One Last Shot
by Whedonist
Chapters 8 thru 9.5
[reviews]
A/N: Angst and gratuitous sex ahead. Be warned...or I guess this is your warning.
Rin believe it or not there is usually motive to my madness...have some faith...
Disclaimer: blah...blah...blah...*cough* Joss's.
Chapter 8
"So that's it Buffy, you're just going to cut me out? We're through. Less than a week?"
Buffy looked into the cold eyes of a witch and the look she saw frightened her.
"I...what are you talking about?"
Willow's words were tight and clipped, "I didn't mean to eavesdrop, but you were giving off some pretty harsh vibes. And then the words 'tell her to go away' filtered through and I heard the rest of it. So that's it uh? You think you're what to evil for me? That's fucking lame Buffy and you know it. What the hell is wrong with you? Do I mean so little to you that you would just throw in the towel so quickly?"
Buffy's eyes were pointed at the tile in the bathroom; she couldn't seem to meet the other girl's eyes.
"Answer me Buffy? Tell me you don't love me; tell me that you only wanted a quick fuck and that I was going to be kicked to the curb at the end of my visit?"
Willow was shaking. She hadn't meant to eavesdrop on Buffy's thoughts. She was in the kitchen making coffee when a wave of what could only be described as remorse made her breathless. Her throat constricted and she had to find out where it was coming from. That had prompted her to probe the area and resulted in her listening to Buffy's thoughts.
"You can't can you? I'm tired Buffy. What do you want? Do you want me to go or stay or just have a quick screw and then fly away and comeback in another year?"
Buffy shuffled her feet and was unsure of how to respond to Willow's accusations. The next few moments surprised her the most. She felt Willow's hand grip her upper arms, the redhead's nails dug into her flesh. Willow began shaking her and forced Buffy to look at her. The blonde raised her head and met the witch's gaze. Tears were streaming down the faces of both girls.
"Say something!"
Buffy pulled away scared and upset. She had never seen Willow like this; this was beyond the magic addicted, grief ridden witch she had faced off with several years ago. This was a far different beast and she had no idea how to handle it.
"I...I...no..." Squaring her shoulders she met Willow's gaze and kept it there. "I don't want that, but Willow let's be real about this for a moment. I can't be with you. It's too much. I'm not...you don't...shouldn't be with me. "She struggled to find the words. If she came out with her true feelings, Willow would know. The witch would end up hating her for what she was feeling.
"What are you running from? What have you been running from?"
"That's rich Wills; I've been here stationary for the past two years. Where have you been? Globe trotting, not staying in one place for more than a week. I've kept tabs. I wanted to make sure that you were safe. What do you want me to say Willow? Do you want me to tell you that now that we've come clean about how we feel that everything is going to be ok? Do you want me to tell you that being the slayer hasn't damaged me? You don't need my shit and you certainly don't fucking deserve it. So just back the fuck off. If you were listening so damn close than you heard the hardest part of what I've got to tell you."
"What?"
"Go away Wills. I've done nothing but fucked your life up since I became a part of it. You could have had some type of normal life without me there. You should try to do that now. So just go the fuck away! You have for the past two years might as well keep up the good work"
Willow's eyes narrowed and she clenched her fists. "I've been trying to find SIT's that we created. You remember the spell that you asked me to do that changed the slayer line? I've been trying to clean up that mess. This isn't about me anyhow Buffy. This is about you and you wanting to shut me out...again. So closed off and shut down you don't even see what I'm offering you. I've talked to Giles. I'm staying in New York. I am not leaving. And another thing Buffy, I'm not leaving you. You can shut me down and tune me out, but I'm staying so deal with it slayer. I'm not the 16 year old girl that can't defend herself anymore. You can't protect me."
Willow's words sunk into Buffy's enraged mind and she used every once of control she could gather not to hit something.
"Get over it slayer. I know you...I think I know you better than most and certainly better than you know yourself right now. So you're scared, big deal. That's one thing that hasn't changed. So am I, but I'm not going to run away. Anything I have is worth fighting for and you are worth going to hell for. I'm sorry for the way I brought you back. I didn't know and a part of me has regretted that decision since the night you came back, but I'm done paying for it. I'm glad you're here. You think I don't know why you went to Spike? I'm not that naïve. Your tryst with him was what you couldn't have with Angel. It was dark and brutal and probably sated some long standing itch you've had since becoming the slayer. He's not here, I am. I hope I'm the one you want. What you think that you can't do that with me. That I'm too fragile to deal with your dark side. Fuck what are you some Jedi knight that got a taste of the dark part of the force. Bullshit, bullshit and wait more bullshit. You want to do dark Buffy? Try letting the god of the underworld invade your skin to get your best friend back. You're a warrior Buffy, the good and the bad are in all of us. It's your choice to give into it or not. It's weakness plain and simple. I never pegged you for weak. Me, I'm stronger than I look. Being the slayer's witch gives you a whole range of skill sets that you didn't think you could ever have."
As Willow continued her rant, the tension in the room built. Buffy wanted to run away at each word that was spoken, but her legs wouldn't move. Again the witch surprised her; Willow moved back into Buffy's space and grabbed her hair at the nape of her neck. Forcing Buffy's head up, Willow stared into the hazel of eye of the slayer, her slayer, and made a decision. If violence was what it was going to take to get through to the other woman then so be it.
Willow held tightly to Buffy's hair and pulled her in. She crushed their lips together. Hard and demanding. It wasn't about love, need, or passion. It was dominance pure and simple. Willow wanted Buffy to know that in that department Willow could not only match her, but probably surpass her. Willow bit and sucked at the slayer's mouth breaking the skin of the top inner lip. Releasing the blonde's lips, she licked at the blood she had drawn. Using as much force as necessary she yanked Buffy's hair and threw her up against the wall. Not leaving room for any retaliation, she muttered a few words and her clothes tore apart. She kept eye contact with the blonde and pushed herself into the smaller girl. She took Buffy's arms and pinned them to the wall above her head. Forcing her knee between the slayers legs, she pressed her thigh into Buffy's sex. She ground herself into the blonde forcing a response from Buffy. Her other hand moved in and grabbed a fistful of hair. She pulled Buffy's head forward and covered the slayer's lips with hers again. She demanded entrance into the mouth and was granted quick access. She bit down on the bottom lip and felt some of the skin give away. Blood mingled with saliva and both girls moaned. The witch sucked Buffy's tongue into her mouth biting on it. As the need for air became too great to ignore, Willow moved her mouth to Buffy's neck. She bit down on the pulse point and sucked the soft flesh into her mouth. Working her way around to the hollow of Buffy's neck, the witch left a series of bite marks at the base of the neck and moved up to Buffy's left ear. She sucked and bit on the earlobe.
Buffy was panting. The anger behind Willow's ministrations and the message she was sending came in loud and clear to the retired slayer. She arched into every sensation the redhead was causing. Her hips rotated on the now slick thigh of the redhead and her nipples were so hard that they ached. Her pussy throbbed and swelled with the onslaught of sensations. She had lost most motor functions and could only let Willow do what she wished.
Willow was working her way down Buffy's shoulder biting and sucking her way to the left breast. She sucked in the turgid nipple and flicked the nub with her tongue. Treating it like she would Buffy's clit, she rotated her tongue around the hard point and then sucked it into her mouth. Using more force than normal she bit down and was rewarded with a sharp intake of breath and a please from Buffy. Willow moved her way across the small girl's chest and roughly ran her tongue over the right breast. She nipped at the soft flesh surrounding the nipple. Teased the area with her mouth and then rolled the tip of her tongue across the swollen flesh. Willow began to move south and then stopped. She pulled Buffy's arms down and began to drag the slayer out of the bathroom.
Willow practically tossed Buffy on the bed. She crawled up the slayer's body and straddled her waist. She needed Buffy to understand. She grabbed her chin and held on. She forced Buffy to look at her. Sliding up to get a better angle, her sex pressed into the blonde's tight stomach.
"Slayer, look at me. There is no more running. No hiding. No pushing me away. You've done it for too long and I'm not taking it anymore. When it comes to me, I'm the boss. When it comes to us, WE make those decisions TOGETHER. You do not get to decide what's good for me. Nod if you understand."
Buffy's head moved a fraction of an inch up and down and Willow smiled. It was almost cold and predatory to Buffy. The way Willow was looking at her she couldn't describe. This was definitely a new side to the witch Buffy couldn't have imagined existed. Briefly her mind flashed back to the vampire they had met wearing her friends face and realized that maybe who she thought her friend was wasn't exactly the person that Buffy had always pictured. This Willow was a different animal and one that wasn't unwelcome in Buffy's world.
"Now since we have that cleared up. I have a few more ground rules to lie down."
Willow waved her hand over Buffy's torso and her arms snapped up above her head. The redhead had magically immobilized her. The ex-hacker moved down to sit on Buffy's mound pressing their sex together. Willow could feel the wetness dripping from her center mingling with Buffy's. She smiled and raked her nails down the other girl's rib cage.
"Where was I? Oh yes, ground rules. First and foremost: you and I are in this together. We do not get to shut the other out to try and protect one another from ourselves or the outside world. We can deal; after all isn't that what being an adult is all about? Two: you do not get to go and sit in the shit that's in your head. You need to let it out and if it involves dark and demented sex or other activities fine, but do not not come to me to scratch that itch." To make the point clear, Willow ran one of her nails up through Buffy's slit and scraped her clit. The moisture on Willow's finger was brought to her lips and licked clean. "Third: quit blaming your self for the decisions that Xander and I made. We knew the risks. We made the call. Sure I was young, but give me some credit, I knew what I had signed on board for and between you and me, I would do it all over again. Now since, you've been compliant in all of this; I'm going to give you the first lesson of the day. Should I continue?" Willow pushed her self down on the slayer as she waited on a response.
"Yyesss," it was the only response that Buffy could manage. The blonde looked into the eyes of her girlfriend and swallowed hard. Maybe agreeing so readily wasn't the smartest idea she had that day.
Willow slid off of Buffy and forced her self between the girl's legs. Willow ran her tongue over Buffy's center, not spreading it open just cleaning off some the girl's juices. She moved to Buffy's inner thigh and left two bite marks on each leg. Moving to Buffy's opening Willow let her tongue open Buffy's sex up. Penetrating the girl, she rammed her tongue in and out of Buffy's hole. Not wanting to draw this out much further, Willow moved north and roughly licked Buffy's clit. Adjusting her body, Willow's hand moved to the other girl's center. She thrust in three fingers and pumped hard. Testing the elasticity, she moved a fourth finger inside her lover as her tongue and lips continued to suck and lick at Buffy's engorged clit.
The only sounds that could be heard in the room were the wet smacking of Willow's mouth, her fingers, and Buffy's moans of pleasure. By nature the blonde had never been a screamer. She was quiet in bed, but Willow was driving her to a mind shattering orgasm in record time. Willow thrust harder as she felt Buffy's muscles begin to tense. Concentrating on the girl's clit, Willow steeled herself for Buffy's release. It came sooner than expected. Buffy's back arched up and her legs went ramrod straight. Her muscles clenched around Willow's fingers, but the redhead continued her movements. A hoarse cry escaped Buffy as she felt every portion of her body constrict and then relax with her orgasm.
Chapter 9
Willow allowed Buffy a moment to rest, but she was by no means finished. The redhead was on fire in ways she didn't think were possible. Pulling Buffy down, she crawled up to Buffy's face and straddled her neck. She saw Buffy inhale the scent of her arousal and noticed the blonde lick her lips. Grabbing a fistful of hair, Willow thrust her hips forward while pulling Buffy's face dead center with her own aching core.
Buffy's tongue immediately lashed out and pulled in some of the witch's cream. She buried her face into the slit and licked at every piece of flesh she could touch. Willow did not allow her that much control as she was using the fistful of hair as a steering wheel. Willow's hips bucked against the slayer's mouth and Buffy, although struggling for breath, would not relent. She sucked and licked at the dripping folds unable to satiate the need for more. She buried her tongue in Willow's channel and curled it up collecting as much of the ex-hacker's arousal as she could. She felt Willow tug on her hair and she smiled. She moved up and began lashing at the distended clit. Feeling her arms free up, she maneuvered her and Willow so that she could slip three fingers into the other girl. Buffy pumped her fingers in and out as Willow directed Buffy's tongue and mouth. Willow's orgasm came too soon for both girls liking. She arched her back and pressed harder into Buffy's face. Not wanting to disappoint her lover Buffy reached up and began playing with Willow's nipples as the redhead's release pounded through her.
Willow fell over in a heap. One leg was bent almost underneath the blonde while the other was resting across the heaving slayer's chest. Minute's passed as both tried to regain some composure. Willow was quicker to respond. She repositioned herself so that she could look at Buffy and play with her boobs. Willow propped her head up on her bent arm. She soaked in the look of her lover and decided to help clean the girl up. She kissed and licked her own juices from the slayer's neck and face. This only caused a groan from Buffy. The witch smirked as she finished up her job.
"Consider that lesson number one."
Buffy turned her head to look at Willow, "Uhm, not to get you upset, but I'm not sure the lesson was entirely clear."
Willow's features relaxed and she snaked her arm behind Buffy's head and pulled the girl close. "The lesson's is this slayer: In the past few years, I've grown accustomed to getting what I want. Willow get's what she wants. I want you. That is lesson number one. I have you and the more you try to push me away the harder I push to get back in. If I have to say it ten times a day for ten years, I AM NOT GOING ANYWHERE. Are we clear?"
"Well, if I get confused on that again I will, uhm, let you know." Buffy smiled mischievously and wrapped Willow up in her arms.
Willow felt the wetness before she heard the quiet sobs. She tightened her grip on Buffy and let her cry until she was calm enough to talk.
Pulling back to look at her lover, Willow wiped the tears from Buffy's eyes and said, "Baby talk to me."
"I just...Will I don't want to hurt you. I'm terrified ok. I just couldn't deal if anything were to happen to you or if you were to leave. You need more than what I can offer. You deserve better." Buffy let out a shuddery breath and rested her head on Willow's shoulder.
"Would it make a difference if I said the only things I want you can provide. It's ok to be scared. It's smart, but don't cut me off because you think I won't like what I see. I haven't had time to prove to you that I'm gonna stay, but for now can you take me at face value?"
"I don't know."
"I can't guarantee the future baby, but I know that I love you. All of you. The slayer part and the Buffy part. I've reconciled that one can't exist without the other and that makes me love them both. Why can't you? You like rough sex, big deal. A lot of people do. I like it when the timing's right see the past half hour for exhibit A. Faith's carrying Xander's kid so ya know he's not a vanilla guy. If Anya didn't tell us a million times then his choice in mother to his child should. It's ok."
"Yeah, but it's different with me. I can hurt you. I wouldn't know what to do if I went too far. I have before."
"You'll have to trust me to let you know. I trust you."
"Will there's stuff you don't know about. About Riley, Spike, and a guy you don't know. Things went too far with them."
"Well, you can tell me, but I don't need to hear it. The past can't be changed and something tells me you've learned a lesson."
"Why are you doing this?"
"It's something I should have done a long time ago. Tara tried to tell me once about you and she thought you had feelings for me. I got upset told her she didn't know what she was talking about. We were buds the best of but we weren't anything more. She did know there were moments I lusted after you but after a ginorrmous fight we had she stopped bringing it up. I can be kinda slow sometimes. We should have done this awhile ago."
Buffy wiped at her nose trying hard not let her current bout of insecurity ruin what Willow just did for. She was sore in places she forgot she had and everywhere Willow bit was on fire and in pain, but she loved the feelings that lingered. The pain caused by her girlfriend soothed the slayer inside her. Made her quiet and allowed Buffy to just be.
"Wills, this, I don't know if I can do this."
"What this?"
"This this, you and I. A relationship. I've never had any luck with them. What makes you think it's going to work?"
"Hmm, well, the way I look at it is this: You and I have never had the luxury of planning for the future. Waking up in the morning was about as planny as I've ever gotten; so why start now? I say we take it a day at a time and when we get used to the daily then we move to the weekly and then well who knows, but I can't not try."
Willow shrugged her shoulders and began wiping away Buffy's tears. She wanted to let what she said sink in.
Buffy raised her lips to Willow and placed a soft kiss on her cheek. Whispering a small thank you to the red head, Buffy drifted off to sleep.