First Respnse
by cathy nort
chapter 4
[reviews]
Willow made up much of the movie's storyline. The Chandlers wouldn't know the difference. She did it quickly because what was on her mind wasn't that. As she talked she kept stealing side way glances at Buffy who had withdrawn into her own world.
Groan!! Their near kiss. That was what Willow thought was the cause. Willow felt certain of it. She shouldn't have let the situation come to that. She should have be more in control of herself. Was there even an intent to let herself be kissed on Buffy's part? Willow felt as miserable as........ as Buffy looked.
But inside Buffy's mind the 'almost kiss' wasn't even in her thoughts. She was miserable because her secret had been exposed. What did Willow think of her? That she was a savage, a killer? She was very fond of the red head sitting beside her and she felt so completely comfortable with Willow. And their budding friendship, Buffy believed, was now in jeopardy of being shattered. Why had she not left the stakes at home? Why had she been so foolish?
But Buffy knew why. Walking home at night didn't frighten her the least bit. But if the undead had attacked while she was with Willow.........? She had to be prepared. Nothing must happen to Willow.
The feelings inside her were so strange. Where had they come from? What had happened in the back seat before her purse had been knocked over? Now, looking back, Buffy wasn't sure if......if it really happened. Was she going to kiss Willow? Oh god, what would Willow have thought? This whole night is so unreal.
As Buffy was drifting in thought she felt the car come to a stop.
In front of her house not in the Chandler's driveway as it always had before. There wasn't going to be the soft luxury of a walk back home with Willow.
Willow looked at Buffy, a tinge of panic in her eyes. She tried to decipher the Slayer's thoughts but Buffy just looked confused.
"See ya around Buff," Connie said from the front seat.
Buffy's mouth hung open and her eyes never left Willow's. but what was there to say? Nothing as long as the Chandlers were there with them.
Buffy looked at Willow. "See you at school."
Willow felt tears form but she shrugged them off. "Yeah, see ya in school."
She watched Buffy climb from the car. She was standing at the curb when they pulled away. Willow managed a weak, pitiful wave as the car pulled away. So much had been left unsaid between her and Buffy. "Oh Buffy, I need you," she said to herself.
Willow felt the worse that she ever felt in her life. And the truth was, so did Buffy.
* * * * *
A bad, unfulfilled situation turned badder. The weekend was lousy enough for the two. Each was left with their own fears and those fears made their embedded thoughts even worse, Each, for her own reason, came to grips with the realization that something precious had been lost forever.
On Monday when Willow took the path to Art class that would lead her past Buffy's locked the blond wasn't there. Lowering her head Willow moved past. The vacant hall her only companion.
Buffy at the time had been held over by her math teacher to help him carry some books to the storage room. The delay that caused wasn't major but it was enough to make her miss the chance of meeting Willow.
Tuesday and Wednesday another road block. Dawn was home sick and since Joyce had to work so there would be a pay check, Buffy had to stay at home with her little sister.
For nearly a week the uncertainties grew and festered as they often did with young, teen girls.
Then Thursday it was Willow who missed the connection. She took her original route to Art. She was convinced that Buffy was avoiding her and it was just too painful passing Buffy's locker and seeing no one there. It was the longest, saddest week of Willow's life.