A Small Creature Who Can Barely Walk
by zingrrrl
4. i've got the gift of fear
[reviews]
The disclaimers remain, except it was time for a soundtrack change. The song belongs to bangs, Sarah Utter,and Maggie Vail.
Thanks go to Valyssia for the beta. Extra credit to her for fixing the fight scenes.
4
i've got the gift of fear
Sick of your ceiling, and tired out of my mind. I've got this feeling, that you and i aren't fine. Don't mean to shut you up, but I can't listen anymore. I need to shut you out. I want to close the door. Full of preconceived notions that I don't want to live up to your lame expectations. But I'm still here. Do you want to know what you're thinking? Do you know it's not fair? For once I'm feeling fucked up and scared. Don't mean to shut you up, but i can't listen anymore. I need to shut you out. I need to close the door. Full of preconceived notions, but I don't want to live up to your lame expectations. But I'm still here. Your same situation, long I've stood accused. - baby's day out - bangs
I wanted to stop crying, but too much had happened and it was all my fault. Why did I keep making things worse, for me and Willow? Faith, well she could handle herself and the crap I dealt her. Sure, she's—well, 'pissed' pretty much described it. And I couldn't blame her. But Willow, would she ever be able to forgive me? Did I want her to? Every time I started to feel a little better about myself, I'd find something to make her hate me just a little more. How much more love was left for me in her heart? How long would it take for me to turn it into absolute hatred?
"Come on, B., we gotta hurry," Faith urged, trying to snap me out of it. "Red's just up ahead, but you gotta feel them."
"Huh?" I gasped. Feel them? What was she talking about? Feel who? Oh, hell. Them! I finally paid attention to my body, the telltale signs of vampires triggering muscles and nerves to twitch. And a lot of them, too. Damn!
"The vamps," Faith yelled, exasperation filling her tone. "Damn it, Buffy. Get it together, or your precious little witch is gonna be some sucker's snack!"
She took off running down the dimly lit street, slayer speed eating up the distance rapidly. Shaking my head to clear it, I tore off after her, nothing close to my full speed, though. I didn't want to outpace her, get myself into a situation where my lack of focus might get someone killed. We ran about a hundred yards and then it sank in, Willow was in real danger! Damn! My introspective pity party might get her killed. Suddenly my thoughts cleared and I regained a focus I hadn't had since I'd killed Xander. Increasing my pace, I easily outdistanced Faith and headed toward the vampires.
We were heading in the direction of my house. I could smell Willow up ahead, maybe a thousand yards away. Her fear was palpable, a sweet and flowery scent that for once I didn't find pleasing. It was Willow's fear, and it was very real. She was in danger. And it was all because of me. Reaching deep inside, I focused on all the inhuman parts, tapping into the demonic. My face morphed into its vampiric form as I focused the extra power into my legs. It took me about ten seconds to cover the distance.
Willow stood in a pool of yellow light cast from an overhead street lamp, surrounded by at least a dozen vamps. They circled her, standing in place but posing menacingly. Maybe they knew she was a dangerous witch, though probably she'd already burnt some with the fire spells she'd kept prepared for me. How much magic could she use at one time without recharging? It wasn't something I really wanted to find out, at least not now. Her eyes were all black, but glazed and tired.
I charged into the vamps at full speed, a blur that pounded on faces and limbs, shoving my way through to stand beside my best friend. "Hey, Will," I greeted, nodding at her.
"Buff ... Buff," she managed between labored puffs of air. Yep, she'd been using magic to defend herself, and yep, it had taken its toll on her.
"Faith's right behind me," I said.
"Slayer!" one of the less gifted vamps yelled, glaring at me. He'd been the one I'd shoved. "She's a vamp?" Now he just sounded pathetic and confused. Yay me.
"I'm gonna clear a path through them," I continued telling Willow. "Run to Faith when I do. Got it?"
She nodded, still breathing hard, but looking better. Her eyes returned to their pretty shade of green and she kinda smiled at me. How I wished the smile was for me and not just relief that she'd survive another brush with badness in the hellhole of a town. Better than nothing, I suppose.
The vamp who'd yelled was first; I smashed my fist into the side of his head, crushing his temple. He collapsed, unconscious. Yanking the stake from my pocket, I hammered it into the chest of the next closest vamp. I didn't wait to see him fall to ash. Instead, I kicked the vamp on my right under the chin, snapping his neck. I wished a broken neck meant decapitation, but it didn't. I followed up with a quick jab of my stake to his heart. He exploded into a cloud of dust.
"Now!" I yelled. Willow flew through the break I created. She headed for Faith, who was running full tilt about fifty yards away.
Suddenly I found my self swarmed over by six of the vampires, all attacking at once, fists flying toward my head and kicks aimed for my ribs and back. Their eyes were full of madness, yellow and slitted, yet purposeful. Did my eyes say the same about me? Was I mad? Just what was my reason for being? As I quickly ducked a blow meant for my temple, a pair of vamps grabbed me from behind, a shoulder each, tearing at me and pulling me down. I caught a glimpse of the remaining three vamps, heading straight for Willow and Faith. I didn't have time to see if Faith'd handle the sitch as one of the vamps nailed me in the tummy with a meaty, hammer like fist. Damn, it hurt, even if I didn't need the breath I forcefully expelled. Could Faith protect them both? Sure. But the vamps could also overwhelm her, especially since two of the vamps fighting me left to follow their buds. Time to end this before someone that mattered got hurt.
Two of the remaining vamps went low, grabbing at my legs. I kicked one in the chin with the tip of my right foot, shattering the bones of the lower part of his face. As he fell to the ground twitching, I threw my right shoulder forward, using the momentum to toss the vamp holding it off balance. He flipped him over me, landing on top of the vamp I just kicked.
As I staked the vamp on top, the one holding my other shoulder let go. His fist slammed into the back of my head as another one crushed my knee. I screamed as tendons and ligaments shredded. I quickly repaid the damage with a stake to the chest. Rolling away from a blow to my head, I swept the one standing vamp onto his ass with my good leg. After quickly hopping to my feet, I turned around just in time to see the other vamp to take a swing at my temple. Duck, stake, clean up on aisle twelve, please. The last of my playmates unsteadily stood up, favoring one of his legs. I don't have time for you. We all know the game: stake to the heart equals one more dead sucker. Class dismissed.
I looked in Willow's direction and saw Faith staking a vamp. He exploded when another vamp lunged for her back. Willow crept up behind the vamp. As she drove her stake through his back, Faith spun around. He exploded and I stood frozen. I couldn't move or even scream. Faith's momentum carried the blow through the dust cloud. Her stake buried into Willow's chest.
When the scream finally tore from my throat, it was inhuman and deadly. Willow crumbled to the ground. Suddenly, I was able to move. Willow hadn't even had the time to cry out. Faith's strength insured her heart or lungs had been pulverized. Grief, rage, hatred ... clawed at me. I sprinted for Faith.
Tears streamed down my face, leaving wet tracks in the ash on my cheeks. Not the same tears—not from self-pity or self-loathing like all the others. Willow ... I wanted to say 'Oh God,' but really, considering everything, that seemed more than a bit morbid...and sorta a wasted effort. Without Willow—well, all the trying—no matter how much in vain—to be good, it was totally pointless. Faith's death loomed, seconds away.
When I reached the Slayer, she faced me. Her expression locked in a mask of shock and stunned disbelief. As the hatred in my eyes registered, her features twisted with terror. I slapped the stake from her hand with a quick flick of my wrist. She tried to step back, to get away from me, but there was no fucking way. Uh-uh. I snatched a handful of her hair, yanking her head back. She didn't have time to scream or throw a punch. Burying my face in her neck, I sank my fangs in.
There was nothing sensual or even remotely sexual about the bite. It was all about death. Ariael become flesh. Faith's life poured down my throat. As I suckled the wound, her heart pounded slower and louder. I'd been forced to listen to Spike ramble on about the qualities of Slayer blood when he'd helped me defeat Angel, but her blood might as well have been ash. It was nothing more than a means, representing her mortality.
"A bit presumptuous, don't you think, Buff?" Xander said, his voice suddenly next to me. Xander? What the hell? I'd killed him, so there was no way he could be there. No way I was gonna look either. Uh-uh. Why couldn't it have been Willow?
Fingers wrapped around my ankle and tugged at my foot to the side. "Buffy, don't," Willow implored. Her voice was weak and shaky. Oh, she was real! I could tell because I felt her touch. She wasn't dead! If I had a heart it might've leapt in my chest. I was instantly relieved—almost happy. If she wanted Faith to live, so be it. I stopped and withdrew, releasing Faith.
The look in her eyes as she stumbled backwards ... well it spoke of abject terror and a deeply rooted hatred. Her face was pasty with shock and blood loss. The flesh around her eyes was ringed with a deep blackish purple from what had to be exhaustion. She appeared to be trying to say something, but couldn't seem to get her dry, cracked lips to move. Death had claimed her. Her reprieve was owed completely to the redhead at my feet.
I turned and looked down at Willow. She lay on her side, struggling with shallow, raspy breaths. Blood trickled from between her bluing lips. Looking at her chest ... huh? I'd expected to see blood soaking through her shirt, spurting from a jagged, uneven wound. Instead, there was nothing, no wound, no blood. But the blood from her mouth said bad things. She was in trouble.
As I kneeled next to Willow, I heard Faith run off. Her staggering footfalls echoed lamely in the cool night air. Her memory faded as I slowly traced the edge of Willow's face with my fingers. "Oh, god, Will. I thought ... I saw ..." I stammered, unable to finish the thought.
"Magic," Willow said with a sharp intake of breath. Wracked by a fit of coughing, she sprayed my arm with blood. My eyes grew wide. I had to get her to a hospital. She needed medical help. She might not have a chest wound, but something inside her was in a bad way. "I used a spell," she continued, "Had it ready"
I reached into her skirt's pocket, hoping she still had her parent's cell phone. She'd been carrying it since she started staying with me. Luck. My hand wrapped around the phone and I pulled it free. Flipping it open, I quickly dialed 911 and held it to my ear. "My friend just got hit in the chest real hard," I told the woman who answered. "She's coughing up a lot of blood." I told the operator where we were.
"It stops the cutting. It's a one shot deal. Y'know, in case you tried to bite me," she continued once I was done. I took her hand in mine and held it tightly to my chest as we waited for the ambulance. "But the kinetic energy's still there. It has to go somewhere, so being stabbed; it's like being hit with a baseball bat. And by a slayer? I think she broke a couple ribs. And one musta, y'know, punctured a lung." She nodded when she finished and gave me a weak smile.
I smiled back at her, used my free hand to brush the hair from her eyes. I'd wanted her to talk to me for days, but this ... not like this.
"She's gonna die, Buffy," Xander said, his voice behind me. Not again. I still wasn't gonna look. "You need to turn her, if you don't want to lose her."
"No!" I shouted.
Willow looked at me like I'd lost my mind. Well, what did you know, I had. "Huh?" she asked.
I shook my head to clear it. It worked, no more Xander voice. "Nothing Will. It gonna be alright."
The ambulance's siren wailed in the distance, drawing slowly closer. I heard Willow's heartbeat, strong and steady. She was bleeding inside, but hadn't lost enough to die. Not yet. If she died, I'd have to kill Faith slowly and painfully. But I didn't think it would come to that. The ambulance arrived. They had plenty of time to save her.
CONT