Loving Willow Til Death Do Us Part
by Rin
4
[reviews]
"Hey...what're you doin' here? Aren't ya supposed to be at home?" Faith walked up to Willow, who was currently nursing what looked like a non-alcoholic beverage, though one could never be too sure.
"No...Buffy's supposed to meet me here after she's done patrolling. What are YOU doing here? Aren't you supposed to be patrolling with her?" Willow was confused. Buffy was supposed to be here at the Bronze for their date an hour ago. They'd been talking about this for a month, ever since the last botched date, and Buffy's mom was released from the hospital. Buffy stayed at the Summers residence more than their home, and Willow wasn't sure if she was supposed to follow Buffy unquestionably, or make sure their home was still running when she decided to return.
"Really? We got done patrollin' about two hours ago. She said she was just gonna go home, and sleep for days." Faith sat down beside the redhead at the table, and nursed her own drink. Non-alcoholic...she was already in the doghouse with Tara. No need to make it worse by calling her drunk later.
"Really? She didn't call...I've been here for over an hour waiting." Willow was beyond upset. This wasn't the last straw...but it was awfully close. This was all Buffy's idea tonight, to go dancing at the Bronze, be together as a couple...just be together in general.
"She didn't mention anything..." Faith was frightened by the look of anger on Willow's face. "Hey...maybe she just forgot. It happens. It was a hard patrol tonight."
"She was the one that said to meet here. She's been talking about it for weeks!" Willow was trying to hold back the tears but she was so angry, she felt she could magick her fist through a wall.
"Hey, Will. Cut 'er some slack. She's had it hard lately." Faith didn't want to take sides but she too had noticed the lack of attention Willow was getting in the relationship. That's what caused the brunette to be extra clingy to Tara lately...except the past two days. She was in the doghouse big time for sneaking into her dorm window at 4 in the morning when Tara had a major midterm at 8.
"I've been cutting her slack for four months now! Can't I have a little slack, too?" Willow lowered her voice when she noticed a couple people staring at her outburst. "It's just...she doesn't even come home lately, and when she does...it's like she's not there. She's always on the phone with her Mom or Dawn...or Giles! She talks to Giles more than she does me!"
"Hey, no need to get upset. She's tryin' to deal." Faith realized she'd better change the subject fast.
"It's like we're not even in a relationship anymore. I'm just a tagalong anymore. She hardly acknowledges me when I AM there. We haven't...ya know..." Willow blushed. "...in over a month, and even then she was too tired to finish...um...with me. It's like I'm just a burden. An unwanted chore she's trying to avoid."
"Don't think like that, Will. B's just tryin' to figure some things out. She almost lost her mom." Faith almost lost Joyce...though she wouldn't voice that out loud to anybody but Tara. When they took Joyce to the hospital, that night was the first time Tara (or anybody for that matter) had seen Faith break down in tears. "Plus, she's on edge tryin' to protect everyone from this Glory chick. We still haven't found anything on her."
"I've been working so hard, too. Yet, she doesn't say anything about it. No 'thank you' kiss, or anything."
"Is that what you want? A thank you kiss?" Faith smirked a little. Willow was so cute when she wasn't trying.
"Yes, no...I don't know. Maybe. I just feel like...like she's ignoring me on purpose. Doesn't she know I'm by her all the way?" Willow sighed heavy, and grabbed her arms, a sudden chill coursing through her body.
"I think she does. I just think that...with everything that's goin' on...she's forgotten. Don't take it personally."
"How can I not take it personally?! We're supposed to be partners!" Willow blushed deeply again, when her outburst had more onlookers. She started to hyperventilate.
"Willow, deep breaths...okay?" Faith patted the redhead's back, scowling at the nosy people. "It'll be okay. You'll see."
"How can you say that? You don't know how much I crave Buffy every second! It's so hard going from all kinds of loving...to none. It's hard to explain...and I'm not sure that I want to..." Willow was blushing more than having trouble breathing now.
"B's a spitfire in bed. You've been with her more than I have. You would..."
"WHAT?!" Willow turned sad, betrayed eyes towards Faith, and it took the brunette a minute to comprehend the reason for the look.
"I just assumed you knew...I'm sorry, Will. I didn't mean any...Look, it was before you even got together. You were still with Fred. The last time was back in high school before that crystal thing got outta hand. It was nothin' really...just sex." Faith backpedalled. The redhead had fire in her eyes.
"The last time? How many times were there?!" Willow was on the verge of a mental breakdown, she decided. She felt like she was losing Buffy, and to top it off, she'd kept secrets. Important secrets...like former lover secrets. She'd been with Faith, too. It wasn't like she'd get terribly mad...but all this time? Not knowing? It was beyond shocking and more than her sensitive system could take at the moment.
"Um...a few? I don't know...I didn't count." Faith shrugged, and offered apologetic eyes to Willow, though there wasn't anything really any need on her part to apologize.
"Sorry, Faith. I just...it's too much. Why wouldn't she tell me something like that? I mean...I was with you, too. She knows that..." Willow trailed off, unsure what her mind wanted her to do...other than get really drunk and pass out.
"I don't know, Willow. Maybe she was just so happy with you, she never even thought about being with me in that way." Faith offered some help, at least. "Maybe that's a compliment on your part...though I'm not so sure how I feel about that..."
"Sorry..." Willow stood up, and grabbed her things. "Can you walk me home?"
"Sure thing, Red." Faith didn't argue. She would've followed the redhead home anyways. It was obvious Willow wasn't thinking clearly, and that always made a person vulnerable for attack in this town.
------------------------
When she walked in the bedroom, she noticed Buffy already fast asleep. Willow decided she'd take Slayer, and sleep on the couch tonight instead. She didn't feel like she was ready to face her lover. 'If you can even call her that anymore...'
As she picked up her pillow, Buffy made no movement. Instead of getting angry, the redhead decided to sleep on it. Cool down a little before confronting the blonde about everything that happened tonight. Making her way to the couch, Buffy's voice stopped her in the doorway.
"Will?" Buffy was beyond tired. All she wanted to do after that massive patrol was crawl into bed with Willow...but the redhead was nowhere to be found.
"Hey..." Willow wouldn't look at Buffy. She knew she'd be a goner, and she needed to steel herself. Stay strong. Keep her resolve. No need to crumble until she's had time to think about things.
"Where were you tonight?" Buffy sounded so lost. Willow had to close her eyes to strengthen her resolve, and not get angry and start yelling.
"Bronze. We had a date." That's all she said before she made her way to the living room. It took ten minutes before Buffy appeared at the end of the couch.
"I'm Sooooooooooo sorry, Will. I forgot." Buffy had to recall in her still sleepy brain what her girlfriend was talking about. "Are you sure that wasn't tomorrow night?"
"Positive." Willow tightened her jaw, and refused to cry or yell. "Go back to bed. We'll talk about it in the morning. I'm not in the mood to talk right now."
"I'm sorry. Patrol was hard, and I ran into Glory again...and I needed to call Giles and Mom, and I just wanted to crawl into your arms and sleep...but you weren't home. I was scared. I called everybody trying to find you. I should've remembered, and I'm sorry..."
"I said not tonight, Buffy. Go back to bed." Willow turned on her side, away from Buffy.
"Aren't you coming?" Buffy stood, and waited for Willow but the redhead wouldn't budge. "Will?"
"I SAID NOT TONIGHT, BUFFY!!" Willow buried her head in the pillow, and refused to let the blonde see her cry.
"Bu-...I..." Buffy was at a loss for words. Willow had never yelled at her before; it was new...and scary. The blonde didn't hesitate, deciding that Willow was right. They'd just talk in the morning once the redhead had time to calm down. She was obviously still upset. It wouldn't do good to get on her bad side right now.
The rest of the night, Buffy couldn't sleep because all her slayer hearing could pick up were Willow's muffled cries from the other room.
-----------------------------------
a/n: I'll get more later. I had inspiration to write this story again, so I hope to stick with it again, get some longer updates!